Breaking up is hard to do!

[skiddles 66]

After my 1st meeting with the nutritionist and she told me all the things I couldn't do-Everything was focused on " No more BREAD!" I'm like the Forest Gump of Bread! Yeast bread, French Bread, Bread pudding, Bagels, Stuffing.

Everything she said I couldn't have is everything I love. Even all the fruits and vegetables I like she said I couldn't have. I got up and said No Thank You Lady!

Luckily I have a great Dr. and his assistant that called me the same day and everyday for 2 weeks and talked me through it!

I now have a new positive nutritionist When I went to the psych, she said I have an eating disorder and needed a year of counseling before I get surgery! WTF! No sh*t doc! I not getting a lap band because I don't have an eating problem!

Then again my Drs crew talked me through it and I went to see another Psych.

Has any one else had to go through this much crap?!

Lets see? the other foods I'll miss the most- pizza will be the hardest to give up.When my husband and I go out to dinner it's always Chinese or Seafood buffets. We eat Pasta 3 times a week and fried chicken and steaks. My favorite part of a meal is dessert! I love love chewy candy like caramels and swedish fish.

I have Diabetes. Right now I'm just on pills. I put a picture of my mom on the wall to remind me why I need to do this. I watched her lose a toe to diabetes. her blood wouldn't clot so a week later she lost her foot. That didn't clot, so 2 weeks later she lost her leg above the knee. After all that, 6 months later she had a diabetic stroke and was in a coma for 10 days before she died. So I want to do this for me so I don't go through what my mom did.

So I have a choice do I want to give up a leg to eat bread? or get healthy. I'm gonna do it.

This web site is the best thing to help me get through all this. I d other people just like me and some worse. and after seeing their accomplishments, I know I can do it. BTW The Dr.s Assistants have all been banded!

I've slowly given up soda and coffee and started drinking Protein shakes for Breakfast. I'm getting psyched, but still cheating.

Thanks for letting me vent!

[Nechama L 4]

The thing you do need to realize is that yeasty breads and pastas will likely get stuck by your band. And, I hope you do not take this the wrong way, but you don't exactly have a healthy relationship with food. Your weekly intake didnt sound like it included anything good for you, fried foods being a prime example. I know that you found a nutritionist who was less a "no" person and a psychologist who gave you a green light, but you should also take a step back and realize that they were not saying what they said to be mean, but because they really believe that there are things you need to address before you take such a drastic step in life.

My mother is 600 pounds in a hospital and I would never want to end up like her. As much as I love breads and pastas, I realized that I had to accept that what I was doing to myself was not the key to longevity and instead of finding loopholes or someone who would take my side in my battle with good foods vs foods I loved, I needed to face my reality. I see so many people on here who get the band and then "cheat" and follow that up with complaining that the band doesn't "work". We all need to realize that obesity is a disease that is both psychological and physical and address all the elements together.

Good luck to you on your journey.

Nechama

[LB4Me 35]

I have to admit, when I was told no more swedish fish (by the psychologist - not the doctor) I had second thoughts about the surgery.

[skiddles 66]

You would be surprised at the foods I was told I couldn't eat compared to what I can't eat. I was told no more bread, no more steak or beef, no more fruits are vegetable with skin, no more carbonated drinks, no more pizza, no more Pasta, no more nuts.

I think that all of these foods have the potential to cause problems in banders, but they don't apply to everyone. I can't eat white doughy bread, but rye, wheat, and grain breads are OK. pizza doesn't seem to be a problem, steak is a problem. I have had no problems with any fruits or vegies. Carbonated drinks don't seem to be a problem either. Pasta seems to be no problem and the same with nuts and seeds.

No matter what it is you have to chew it up until it is like paste, if you can't chew it up, you won't be able to eat it.

That being said I eat very little bread or pasta because of the carbs. I have pizza only on special occasions. I don't really like carbonated soft drinks, but I have been known to have a beer once in a great while.

Congrats to you on your success! You're the reason I love this web site. I can be honest and get encouragement!

[bluekerry 3]

I think a food addiction (like mine) is comparable to an alcohol addiction. I am only speaking for myself here not others. A friend of mine who is a recovering alcoholic told me one time that she abused the privilege of drinking alcohol so she lost that privilege if she wanted to survive.

I think of it the same way with food. Because I abused the privilege of eating anything I wanted by overindulging, I lost the privilege of eating all the "good stuff". If I want to survive to see my grandchildren I HAVE to give up some of the "good stuff". It's a choice. I would rather give up some of the "good stuff" than give up a foot or leg due to complications of diabetes.

It's a hard choice but I choose to live a healthy life and give up the "good stuff". I still on occasion have a bite of the good stuff but only a bite and as a treat.

You have a choice too. I am sure you are aware of all the complications of diabetes. If you continue on this path insulin is in your future. But again, it is your choice.

I hope I didn't ramble but my point is changing your eating habits and lifestyle is very hard and very complicated.

Good luck not matter which road you choose.

[mandilou 1]

Skiddles -

First of all CONGRATS TO YOU for coming to the realization that you have to make a change.

As you get closer to surgery, you will have to take a very, very hard look at what you're willing to avoid in order to live your best life possible. I am not a therapist, so I cannot speak on whether you have a food addiction. But as someone who went through TWO YEARS of hoops and spent nearly FOUR YEARS thinking about this surgery, I can tell you DON'T RUSH IT. Do not try to seek out a therapist who will give you a go-head without an MMPI or a few counseling sessions. So many of us are in this position because we made food choices based on emotional or life situations. And it really can be helpful. Find a bariatric center of excellence or other full hospital-affiliated program who has a team of surgeons, nutritionists, dietitians, PA, etc. - so that you can receive all of your care in one location. Do lots of research to see what your best options are for a lot of support pre and post surgery.

As someone who was just banded a week ago today - it is NOT worth the pain, the surgery, the healing, the emotions that crop up... unless you are fully prepared and ready to use the lapband as a tool to create a successful future for yourself.

Skipping steps before the surgery can lead to long-term lack of success, due to not being completely prepared. Definitely take advantage of this site - I've been a member for four years, and it has been an excellent place for me to read about every stage of the process and really ask myself some tough questions.

GOOD LUCK!!!

[skiddles 66]

Maybe I should elaborate on getting a second psych eval; After 30 mins of chatting and asking me general questions, she told me because I like certain things done in a specific way, I have OCAD! Because I don't go to bars or parties or socialize alot, I'm reclusive and anti-social. Because I usually the lead in in organizing different types of functions, I'm narcissistic!Then because I have anxiety attacks I need to get off my meds before I have surgery. So she had to go. So I wasn't looking for a Dr. that would tell me what I wanted to hear. My Bariatric Dr. and all the office people said they never heard of anything so ridiculous. Since then she's been taken off the referral list.

And I also know how to control my diabetes I have brought my A1c from 11 to 7.1 I eat the right things, just too much!. I went from drinking sodas to diet sodas to crystal light. My point was getting hit with "never again" for everything I like was alittle too much to swallow! LOL. The never again included strawberries, grapes, apples, cheese not just the unhealthy stuff.

[Rachel412 116]

I'll tell you that the nutritionist warned me about a lot of foods but as of yet, I haven't come across one thing I CAN'T eat. That may change as I get more fills. On the other hand, I know that I am very much a carb addict, so for me to lose weight, I had to cut way, way back on my carb intake.

The reason I say this is: you may not believe it, but after a while you really won't crave, or miss, the breads you're so addicted to now. Yes, garlic bread still looks good to me and I can have some if I really want it, but it doesn't much seem worth it anymore. I've switched from having sandwiches on rolls to making them on a low-carb, high Protein wrap. Instead of regular crackers, I eat whole grain flatbreads with Protein and seeds and stuff in them. Instead of having regular chips I get soy chips. Popcorn- I still avoid it as I'm paranoid about having a kernel skin get stuck in my stoma. Cereal... it's my big trigger food so I have a little Kashi in my yogurt.

[Rachel412 116]

A lot of times I will just make a wrap with a leaf of lettuce and forget the bread. I have tried popcorn, but not on purpose. We were at the movie and my wife had a bag of popcorn and I suddenly found myself eating it. It wasn't until she asked me if I was suppose to be eating it that I remembered what I was doing.

Isn't it funny how that happens? If I'm at a restaurant and they put Water in front of me, I drink it while I'm eating without even thinking about it. My husband has to point it out to me.

[mandilou 1]

Maybe I should elaborate on getting a second psych eval; After 30 mins of chatting and asking me general questions, she told me because I like certain things done in a specific way, I have OCAD! Because I don't go to bars or parties or socialize alot, I'm reclusive and anti-social. Because I usually the lead in in organizing different types of functions, I'm narcissistic!Then because I have anxiety attacks I need to get off my meds before I have surgery. So she had to go. So I wasn't looking for a Dr. that would tell me what I wanted to hear. My Bariatric Dr. and all the office people said they never heard of anything so ridiculous. Since then she's been taken off the referral list.

And I also know how to control my diabetes I have brought my A1c from 11 to 7.1 I eat the right things, just too much!. I went from drinking sodas to diet sodas to crystal light. My point was getting hit with "never again" for everything I like was alittle too much to swallow! LOL. The never again included strawberries, grapes, apples, cheese not just the unhealthy stuff.

AHH - this makes way more sense. Thanks for the clarification.

To the others - I agree that the band seems to really be finicky depending on the user. There seem to be some TRENDS, but I haven't seen any "absolute no" for anyone on here. I'm interested to see (once I can handle solid foods) what personality my band has.

[skiddles 66]

I have heard the one thing nobody could handle was apples. I thought I would miss soda, but after not having one for so long, I had some, and couldn't stop burping! Funny, it's easy to give up certain food you love if it hurts you to eat it. I had a partial done 9 months ago, and since I've had to give up gum, anything with seeds, nothing real chewy. I don't miss it as much as I thought I would, I know if I eat it or drink it it's going to hurt.

[skiddles 66]

So- to generalize- The band has a mind of its own and wait and see what I can tolerate. I hope I can't eat bread or any variation. since that's my weakness.

[kll724 3,055]

Hi Skiddles and all,

I was reading this and thought i would join in. Skiddles, you are a lot braver than my husband. I am afraid that one day he might end up like your mother. He is afraid of surgery, and he has lost 2 siblings during the same.

Anyway, back to the topic. I don't eat much bread. I can tolerate toasted bread, and bread sticks. I can't tolerate steak of any kind. I eat my fruit as part of a smoothie. I eat some veggies, but they have to be well done. Can't eat veggies from a restaurant, as, usually, they are crispy. I can eat the tops of asparagus, and broccoli. I can not eat diced tomatoes. So, if we are having chili, I have to ask my husband(who is the cook), to not use the diced tomatoes. I can't eat salad at all. I have found that there are some things that I chew and have to spit out into a napkin. You are not condemned to never eating things you like, you just have to find what your band and diet will tolerate. AND stay away from your food triggers. They can be your biggest enemy. Mine is chocolate. I can't eat it as it cause me to overeat it. Good luck to us all. Karen