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I wish I had kept my lapband a secret.....

Do you ever wish you had kept your lapband surgery a secret? I know people are curious and I love the support, but I am getting exhausted from all of the questions that I keep getting asked at work.

People have gone to the extent to ask me how many ounces of Fluid I have taken in per day and I don't understand why they care. Today my boss, who is really competitve when it comes to fitness/weight loss, wanted to know how much I needed to lose and what my goal was long-term. She basically wanted to know what my weight is now and that's my business and all my business only.

I had my surgery nearly a week ago, but didn't know questions would start this quick. I am very open and don't mind curious minds at all, but there is a difference in people who just want to know for other purposes. I guess I just need to kindly learn how to say I'm doing good and leave it at that.

I am not one to flaunt weight loss or act like I'm "all that" and I never have been.......I guess people just get worried that after surgery I'm going to get smaller than them. I think it's ridiculous. It's okay though because I'm doing this for me and my health! I hate situations like this because I'm really kind to everyone and don't want to appear "secretive," but issues with weight are sometimes touchy.

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  • I onytold my husband and the woman I work with...and I am SO glad! I have only lost 6 pounds since surgery (almost a month ago). I can tell the woman I work with looks at my lunch so I am glad no on

  • phatgirl 2011
    phatgirl 2011

    @ Jerseygirl and NJgirl These are the reasons I only told my immediate and close family members and about 3 or 4 friends and that was only because about 2 of em had the surgery themselves and the ot

  • Sistersue
    Sistersue

    I've told everyone. In part because I live in a small town and if they don't know what's gong on they make it up but also because I want people who are overweight to know. I know now that most of th

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Honestly, there are a TON of people I didn't tell. I only have told my nearest and dearest about the surgery. Obviously, people know that I'm losing weight; but the methods that I use to do so are my personal business. Really, it's no different than any diet / exercise program, except that I have a little tool to help me eat less. :)

I'm sorry that people are asking you so many questions and pestering you. I think you have every right to tell them that it's your personal business and you don't feel like talking about it. I don't think it's being secretive at all; I think it's a matter of personal boundaries and comfort level.

  • Author

You're smart for keeping it quiet!

I started out telling family and close friends, but then one lady at work overheard me on the phone and it spread like wild fire. It was my fault for not telling the doctors office I needed to call them at a later time.

Like you said, it's actually just another diet plan. I don't care because at the end I know I will be healthier and much happier! I am positivie this is going to work for me!

It's so awful how news spreads like that!! Sometimes I wonder if people have anything better to do! I think you have a really positive attitude about it, and yes, it will work for you! It's just too bad that people have to be nosy sometimes... best of luck!

I haven't told many people. 3 people at work know and my immediate family. I'm a very private person. Peopl obviously know I'm losing weight. And I've been asked a few times how much I've lost. I say I'm keeping that to myself. A couple times people have been like, you must've lost at least _ #. Really? If I said I didn't want to tell you (in a nicer way) why must you guess.

I didnt tell anyone that I was having surgery in March (Work people I mean) After surgery I didnt care who knew but I didnt plaster it around the workplace. However my frustration comes in when people assume it is easy because I have the band. It is not easy. Everyday I can eat all the junk I want. The band doesnt keep me from eating a gallon of ice cream. There is a lot will power involved but people dont see that.

  • Author

It's still a diet and it still requires will power and lots of it! I never thought I would make it through two week post op diet and I did. It's amazing what happens when you set your mind to something!

I onytold my husband and the woman I work with...and I am SO glad! I have only lost 6 pounds since surgery (almost a month ago). I can tell the woman I work with looks at my lunch so I am glad no one else knows. I guess I wouldn't mind as much if I had a good weight loss, but that's no the case yet. I don't need the food police around me-I have enough stress! I look at it this way...it's my journey and I own it. I guess sometimes it would be nice to talk to others about it-someday, just not yet!

I have to say if I could do it over I would only tell immediate family/bf. I didn't shout it from the rooftops or anything but I did tell a few people @ work, a few friends here and there and now everyone knows. I get self conscious I feel like people are looking @ me like "she hasnt lost much weight or looking @ me funny everytime I put something in my mouth.

@ Jerseygirl and NJgirl

These are the reasons I only told my immediate and close family members and about 3 or 4 friends and that was only because about 2 of em had the surgery themselves and the other 2 are thinking about the surgery. I don't want people looking and watching what i eat and whether secretly or openly judging my food and weight loss. It's my business and it's still going to be a battle. I'm fightig it now. I've gained 12 of the 30lbs. i lost! :blink: being on solid food of course. smh. But it's a struggle. I'm hoping for my first fill tomorrow. But keeping something like this close to your heart is a better idea.

Do you ever wish you had kept your lapband surgery a secret? I know people are curious and I love the support, but I am getting exhausted from all of the questions that I keep getting asked at work.

People have gone to the extent to ask me how many ounces of Fluid I have taken in per day and I don't understand why they care. Today my boss, who is really competitve when it comes to fitness/weight loss, wanted to know how much I needed to lose and what my goal was long-term. She basically wanted to know what my weight is now and that's my business and all my business only.

I had my surgery nearly a week ago, but didn't know questions would start this quick. I am very open and don't mind curious minds at all, but there is a difference in people who just want to know for other purposes. I guess I just need to kindly learn how to say I'm doing good and leave it at that.

I am not one to flaunt weight loss or act like I'm "all that" and I never have been.......I guess people just get worried that after surgery I'm going to get smaller than them. I think it's ridiculous. It's okay though because I'm doing this for me and my health! I hate situations like this because I'm really kind to everyone and don't want to appear "secretive," but issues with weight are sometimes touchy.

I am with you on this one. I only told two neighbors, two of my best friends and my family. One of my friends, not a close friend, asked what kind of surgery I was having because they knew I was gong to be off work. I just said a hernia. Which was basically true. I had what my doctor calls a BAF repaired (Big Ass Hernia). I am 6 days out from surgery. Still sore but each day gets better and better. My family and my best friends call and come over to see if I need anything. Instead of wine or food, which they normally bring, my one friend brought me yellow roses. I look at them and feel, my gosh, every celebration or illness does not need to revolve around food. I am glad I did not tell too many. At first I told two neighbors and they about had me in tears of how dangerous it was, how I'm not that big, why would I do something that drastic, etc. Needless to say, by surgery week I was ready to cancel. If not for the support of my husband, who was also nervous about me having surgery, I would have cancelled. He just kept saying you have come so far, and gone through so much just to get to this point, don't let others impact your decision.I am so glad that I did not. I have lost 11 lbs since pre-op diet. I feel better. I enjoy my food so much more. I have to tell you the Protein drinks mad me very ill. I threw all of them out today since this is day 1 for soft foods for me.

After all the hype goes away, they will forget you even had it done. If they are envious that you are smaller, time for them to get back on the treadmill. LOL

I only told my immediate family and one friend. Where I used to work, lots of people were banded, and got very little post-op education, so most of them barely lost or lost and then gained back quickly. I'd always hear people at work saying "I just saw her eat xyz" or negative things. I don't know why WLS has such a stigma, but it does.

At this point I don't have restriction from my band, so when I say I've lost with a combo of diet and exercise, it's totally true. If people ate like me, they'd most likely lose weight too.

I have NO problem with people who decide to tell everyone and be an open book- I admire that! It's just not the right choice for me.

@ Jerseygirl and NJgirl

These are the reasons I only told my immediate and close family members and about 3 or 4 friends and that was only because about 2 of em had the surgery themselves and the other 2 are thinking about the surgery. I don't want people looking and watching what i eat and whether secretly or openly judging my food and weight loss. It's my business and it's still going to be a battle. I'm fightig it now. I've gained 12 of the 30lbs. i lost! :blink: being on solid food of course. smh. But it's a struggle. I'm hoping for my first fill tomorrow. But keeping something like this close to your heart is a better idea.

I go for my first fill tomorrow too! Let me know how you make out! I know I need a good fill, although I know it may take a few to get to that 'sweet spot'

@ Jerseygirl and NJgirl

These are the reasons I only told my immediate and close family members and about 3 or 4 friends and that was only because about 2 of em had the surgery themselves and the other 2 are thinking about the surgery. I don't want people looking and watching what i eat and whether secretly or openly judging my food and weight loss. It's my business and it's still going to be a battle. I'm fightig it now. I've gained 12 of the 30lbs. i lost! :blink: being on solid food of course. smh. But it's a struggle. I'm hoping for my first fill tomorrow. But keeping something like this close to your heart is a better idea.

I go for my first fill tomorrow too! Let me know how you make out! I know I need a good fill, although I know it may take a few to get to that 'sweet spot'

I go for my first fill tomorrow too! Let me know how you make out! I know I need a good fill, although I know it may take a few to get to that 'sweet spot'

Banded 5/23. and when were u? I have nooo idea if i will be given a fill tomorrow or not but I hope i am cleared for the pool! I swim and do aqua aerobics for exercise so this is something I NEED! lol good luck to you and i will keep u posted.

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