Do you ever wish you had kept your lapband surgery a secret? I know people are curious and I love the support, but I am getting exhausted from all of the questions that I keep getting asked at work.

People have gone to the extent to ask me how many ounces of Fluid I have taken in per day and I don't understand why they care. Today my boss, who is really competitve when it comes to fitness/weight loss, wanted to know how much I needed to lose and what my goal was long-term. She basically wanted to know what my weight is now and that's my business and all my business only.

I had my surgery nearly a week ago, but didn't know questions would start this quick. I am very open and don't mind curious minds at all, but there is a difference in people who just want to know for other purposes. I guess I just need to kindly learn how to say I'm doing good and leave it at that.

I am not one to flaunt weight loss or act like I'm "all that" and I never have been.......I guess people just get worried that after surgery I'm going to get smaller than them. I think it's ridiculous. It's okay though because I'm doing this for me and my health! I hate situations like this because I'm really kind to everyone and don't want to appear "secretive," but issues with weight are sometimes touchy.

I didnt tell anyone until 2 weeks before the surgery. i worked at a school and we were going onto Christmas break so I knew i was going to work my butt off so when i got back to work everyone would notice....i did and it was great. then i swiched job to a catering business... I told my boss only because he wanted me to try everything from the kitchen and so then word got out and they watch everything i pull out of my lunh box. I find it keeps me acountable and when I swich out my uniforms every 2 weeks for a smaller size they are right there to ask what size are you now??? I can say I had to have this done due to my BP I was on 5 rx's a day and it was still over the stroke level.....2 weeks after the band I am off everything but a Water pill... I dont care who knows or what they say this was a LIFE saver for me and I would do it again ..... I let them ask me questions till they are blue hoping that maybe I can help someone with the info...I have one supervisor man 26 who is very stupid and cant understand why i would do this to myself (stupid) but I am so happy with me !!!! first time in a LONG time..................<3<3<3

Amy

Hello

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wish my lapband was a secret. If it did all the work for me and was a magical cure than I wouldn't care who knew but because the weight loss journey is an everyday battle of will power, figuring out the right formula of carbs and cals and what my body responds to... and because the band is not a wonder tool for me.... than yes, I wish nobody knew.

I started out with only my family knowing but because I ended up with a horror start of a stomach perforation and nearly dying then my mother told EVERYONE in her existence. I know she did so out of worry and because of how serious it all was so I try not to make her feel bad about it BUT what that means is that every single relative and friend of the family knows and I am well aware that people judge WLS as being an easy way to lose weight etc

The weight I lose I claim all to my doing. The strength, the wins, the losses, the ups and downs, the continuing struggle all belong to me.

I am a very private person and it mortified me when I knew that everyone knew LOL.

ahhh well, what's done is done.

I just got home today and had surgery yesterday. I am a teacher and so I don't have the problem of anyone at work knowing about it. I go to teacher related things all the time so I told my immediate family that I had a conference to go to overnight. I just happened to come home with the flu. The only one that I told is my husband and one friend at work since I don't want anyone to find out. The Lapband is just a tool and I think this will take a lot of work. I don't want people talking behind my back or watching what I eat or thinking I took the easy road. My parents, kids and siblings have no idea. It is my little secret and I want to keep it that way. That is why this forum is so nice.

I've told everyone. In part because I live in a small town and if they don't know what's gong on they make it up but also because I want people who are overweight to know. I know now that most of the people I thought did it on their own actually did it with surgery. If I had known that I would have done this years ago. I don't give everyone the details of what I eat or how much I've lost, I onlyreallygive details to those who are close to me or I think could benefit.

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I just got home today and had surgery yesterday. I am a teacher and so I don't have the problem of anyone at work knowing about it. I go to teacher related things all the time so I told my immediate family that I had a conference to go to overnight. I just happened to come home with the flu. The only one that I told is my husband and one friend at work since I don't want anyone to find out. The Lapband is just a tool and I think this will take a lot of work. I don't want people talking behind my back or watching what I eat or thinking I took the easy road. My parents, kids and siblings have no idea. It is my little secret and I want to keep it that way. That is why this forum is so nice.

I am the same way-I don't care much about peope at work knowing but I ony told 1 person there. No one in my family knows (not my mother, kids, or even my best friend). I feel perfectly fine without my family and friends knowing!

TOTAL AGREEMENT WITH YOUR POST - MY SENTIMENTS EXACTLY, I TOLD NO ONE BUT FAMILY AND DO NOT PLAN ON IT!

PEOPLE THINK THEY CAN SAY TO MUCH, IF THEY OVER STEP THEIR BOUNDS DO NOT BE AFRAID TO PUT THEM IN THEIR PLACE LADIES!!!

@ Jerseygirl and NJgirl

These are the reasons I only told my immediate and close family members and about 3 or 4 friends and that was only because about 2 of em had the surgery themselves and the other 2 are thinking about the surgery. I don't want people looking and watching what i eat and whether secretly or openly judging my food and weight loss. It's my business and it's still going to be a battle. I'm fightig it now. I've gained 12 of the 30lbs. i lost! being on solid food of course. smh. But it's a struggle. I'm hoping for my first fill tomorrow. But keeping something like this close to your heart is a better idea.

Today was a day I wish I had kept my band a secret. My mom has basically told everyone in my family (even members I haven't spoken with or seen in 20 yrs.). I know she is doing this because she is excited and proud of me but.....this is my journey. I want to tell people in my own time....oh well!

lol, mum's hey!!!

Today was a day I wish I had kept my band a secret. My mom has basically told everyone in my family (even members I haven't spoken with or seen in 20 yrs.). I know she is doing this because she is excited and proud of me but.....this is my journey. I want to tell people in my own time....oh well!

Sister Sue....we sound like we have similar situations. I live in a town with less than 1,000 people and if you tell the preacher then the whole congregation knnows so to speak! In a way, people knowing is my motivation to show them that it CAN work! Thanks for the feedback everyone.....forums are pretty helpful!

I only told my husband and my father. It has been three months and even my best friend doesn't know. I would not change a thing. I didn't need extra eyes or whispers while i journey towards my goal...

These are the reason why I dont want anyone to know about my band and more. The reason why I got the band is because I constantly being asked about my weight. Co workers Asking me.. "Have you weigh yourself lately?". It hurted my feelings that I wanted to cry on the spot and so I told them.. "Well Im planning to do the lap band thing"

Well after a few days they kept asking me about it and bugging me if Im gonna do it. I told them yeah. And guess what they said? "Well you you know If you loose weight by exercising, you will get more respect"

I know what you feel. They dont want you to loose more weight than them.

So from then on when they ask me about if Im gonna do the band I just tell them, "No I dont have money so Im just dieting." and any other personal questions I just ignore them and dont reply back.

I wish I would have just told my hubby, daughter and best friend but my family and managers at work know. The only people that are the problem is family especially my mother, mother in-law and sister in-law. they are always asking my questions and looking at what I am doing. I had to tell the managers because I had to give them a doc note to use my extended illness time off. No one else at work knows and if the found out someone would be in trouble because that means they looked in my medical file (I work at a dr's office).

~Kris

I have found that NOT keeping the secret has been amazing.

Yes sometimes, i feel like people are judging me... jeez, that girl has a band... what is she doing putting THAT in her mouth??

Even if I haven't had something for 6 months!

I think people will say that whether they know or not, cause i'm still a big girl.

I have found that because people know, i am getting support from unexpected places. Friends at work, and family of course.

It has helped me stay true to my goals and work as hard as i can

But i know this isn't for everyone........ I just love the support and understanding from most (you'll never get everyone on board)

The first time around, I told everyone. That was a big Mistake. I was Judged, told things like don't you have control, You can do it if you want,Just skip meals or don't you have any willpower?

I heard them all. We were instructed to spread the word. Now I know why? It drummed up business for him, but ripped me down to the ground.

I never heard congrats ! That took nerves to do.

So when I got refilled again this year, my lips are sealed ! I still don't think Society is ready for selective surgery. Even face lifts are still criticised.

brbm6 ... I sooo understand! Same thing happened to me and my own mother was one of the culprits!

I told only close family and a couple of friends. I assumed they would all keep it to themselves. BIG, wrong assumption. Some of whom I told, had no problem telling the world. I should have asked them to keep it to themselves rather than assuming that they would, although that may not have even stopped the gossip.

Simple sad fact. If you don't want anybody to know, Don't tell anybody. A secret is no longer a secret once it is shared.

On the other hand, after the initial shock of learning that everybody in my life now knows my business .. I don't really care. Ok, I care sometimes, like when I see people watching what I eat. It makes me want to do things just to shock them. Like fill a plate like a volcano with Desserts. Of course I wouldn't eat it and I've never done it, but I DO have that urge.