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Husband hurt my feelings....

For those who have followed my posts you will know that I was banded in Aug '10 and have lost 50lbs to date!!!

You would figure that is a wonderful thing, until your husband comments:

"are your gaining weight again? you look flabby"

WTH!!!! what a way to really hurt someones feelings! :(

I just hate men sometimes :angry:

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  • Sometimes the idiotic things men say astounds me!!!!

  • Men often don't know how to word things. He may have simply been saying that you are looking looser (this is a good thing, it means you're losing weight) and oddly, that extra skin can make someone l

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Men are jerks at times! Do this for you, not for him!! He may be jealous...

i am such a witch with a capital b.. i would have probably said something ugly right back at him.. guys, don't think when they open their mouths.. I really don't understand it.. I haven't really gotten much support from my husband during my journey.. Do what makes you feel happy..

We think long and hard before we open our mouths. We know that anything we say can get us in trouble, even if we didn't mean anything by it. Is your husband overweight too? If so he doesn't sound too happy about you losing weight.

The big stinker! Makes you wonder why people say stuff sometimes......

You should just totally forget father's day this weekend (I'm hoping you guys have kids) and then when he asks why you didn't get him a card/gift just say "I was too flabby to go out and get one!"

Hopefully he realizes what he said and give you a genuine apology. Keep your chin up!

TOTAL agreement with men do not think before they speak.

Tell him your admirer at the "book store" thought you lost weight ! :D HAHA

Sometimes a little reminder of what they have is all they need to realize how stupid the things they say are! SMILE!:rolleyes:

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The big stinker! Makes you wonder why people say stuff sometimes......

You should just totally forget father's day this weekend (I'm hoping you guys have kids) and then when he asks why you didn't get him a card/gift just say "I was too flabby to go out and get one!"

Hopefully he realizes what he said and give you a genuine apology. Keep your chin up!

Shelley's post just made me laugh so loud!! Lol

I agree with Allie, by saying someone else noticed will really ruffle his feathers! My husband HATES when I say someone compliments me, he's always like "No one should be looking at my chocolate drop!!" lol...men! #RollsEyes

That was a crappy thing for him to say, but as I always say "men are VARMINTS'. lol! Sorry, all you great guys out there. lol!

Just keep doing what you are doing. I have not had Lap Band, yet, but plan to in a few months if all goes well. HOWEVER, I have dealt with those kind of comments from my dad over the years. I lose weight all the time, just to gain most of it back so he feels he has to comment on it. It's very frustrating because unless someone has been in our shoes to know what it's like, they Just DO NOT know. I always feel like this is a type of addiction just like an alcoholic in an ABC store. That's the only way I can describe it best. That's why I don't do well at buffets, no matter how good my intentions are. Something in my brain just goes haywire with all of that good food around.

Many blessings to you as you continue your journey. Don't allow his comment to bring you down.

I'm not going to generalize men, since I know a lot of men who think about what they say, my partner included; but I am sorry to hear that he said this to you. My guess is he feels insecure about his own weight or appearence, and is jealous of your weightloss.

Don't let it get to you unless he does it on a regular basis. Just try to look at the accomplishments that you have made. I think you're doing awesome, 50 pounds! You ROCK!

Well that was a crappy thing to say...they really don't think sometimes..my husband has done the same thing! Just keep looking towards the future and how great you will feel!

Aww, I'm so sorry he said that to you. That's so hurtful. ((hugs))

My husband said to me one time "Geez, your really getting fat!" He said it 2 weeks after I had given birth to our daughter. Let me rephrase that....my EX husband said it!! Men can be such asses!!

Gag! I am so sorry your husband said that to you! Men...what can ya do...

Just a few days ago, after losing 30+ lbs, I was able to fit into a summer dress that I had

previously bought two years ago. I was getting ready to go to my brother's graduation and my husband

takes one look at me and goes, "UGH! Don't wear that to a graduation! All the high school boys are

going to look at you. Can't you just put something more casual on...like old jeans and a t-shirt?"

I gave him the evil eye. I think now that I am losing weight, he's insecure that I might get big headed and

not want him anymore. It's cute in a way, but more so frustrating.

Keep your head up girl!

Ugh- men can be so dumb! Just tell him that after your done losing and you get your TT you won't have any flab

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We think long and hard before we open our mouths. We know that anything we say can get us in trouble, even if we didn't mean anything by it. Is your husband overweight too? If so he doesn't sound too happy about you losing weight.

As a matter a fact he is overweight I think he is just jealous.....He has been banned from my room and bed LOL

Wow, I don't even know how to respond to that. My husband has to much of a sense of self-preservation to ever say anything to me. Even when I was 265 pounds he didn't say a word. I love him for that.

A comment like that has nothing to do with him or even coming up with a proper pay back. What it is is an invitation to really examine your self-esteem, self-worth and the ability to love yourself no matter what size you are as well as give yourself props for how far you've come. Take that comment, ask yourself why it hurt, and look deep within to find proper perspective. You'll find it, it's in there. You may just find that the comment hurt because you weren't quite 100% loving yourself yet. When we know we are fabulous it doesn't matter what other think. I recently blogged for my doctor at www.realresultswls.com on just this issue.

Even though I'm no hardbody I prance around at the pool now knowing how fabulous I am because of where I've been and how far I've come. No one else knows this but I do and it shows. So, sure, people probably look at me and think wow, her thighs giggle or her arms are a little flabby but I don't care because I know how awesome I am.

Read my blog Share Your Fabulousness and you'll see what I mean. It might just help you realize how fabulous you are and any future comments from your hubby or anyone else will just roll right off your awesome self!

P.S. Congrats on the weight loss. You are awesome.

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