The first part of this post is copied from the About Me part in my profile. I decided to use it here because I would like some feedback please.

I was banded in March 2009. I came home, somewhat in discomfort and over the following days I progressed into agony. I ended up back in hospital having emergency surgery at 2am five days after the placement. I had been nicked in the first surgery and had an infection. The band was removed and I spent four days in ICU and then another four or five in the ward. It was the most PAINFUL experience in my life and it wasn't too good emotionally either.

After I returned home there was a long recovery period and I initially thought I could not face hospital again with rebanding. My surgeon explained that I may have to be opened up again (I have a huge scar down my middle because of the emergency surgery) if it proved impossible to do it keyhole. I had to gather up all my strength and return to try again in August 2009 because I didn't want all that pain and money wasted... with no outcome except a scar to show for it. Fortunately the second banding went without a hitch and it was a keyhole op.

It hasn't been an easy journey. I can't seem to tolerate a decent fill without severe reflux and choking during the night etc. So, I only have enough fill to make sure I don't suffer those symptoms but then it means I can fit way more in than I would like to. I initially lost a decent amount... but only after low carbing combined with 3 or 4 days at gym every week. I have the metabolism of a slug!! Over the past 12 months I have regained 10 kgs (22 lbs).

I am just beginning again to try to start from scratch in my mindset. Force myself to eat less, chew more, don't drink with meals etc.

People who look at banding as 'cheating' and 'easy' have NO IDEA. Us banders still need colossal willpower and determination. It is a life-long struggle and the trick is to remain proactive in our journey and not give up. I always knew banding was just another tool in my arsenal and not a magic fix... I just have to sharpen this particular tool at this point in time and make it work for me.

Don't get me wrong though I WISH THIS BLOODY BAND WAS A MAGIC FIX and I didn't have to diet or exercise!!!!!

Now... first of all I am not vying for sympathy here or wish to put off any potential banders. I am just saying it as it is for me. The band has been a wonderful tool for many on this site as the many glowing posts attest to and I wish all you newbies the best of luck.

I would like to hear from others who have been on a similar journey. Having a fairly successful honeymoon period... putting in the hard yards with diet and exercise... and then grinding to a halt.

I would like to know how others who suffer from severe reflux and choking from having the band at a level where restriction is effective but need to unfill it enough so that those symptoms don't occur... and therefore can eat more than they should on the band.

I have considered changing to a sleeve but from what I have read they too have a honeymoon period of losing and then the same problems can occur... starting to eat more etc. I don't want to change one set of problems for another... I want the band to work for me... I want me to work for me.

I am at bit of a standstill. I am still having the same problems that I have had all my life. I hate people harping on about willpower. I have lost 1000s of pounds in my life and put them all back on. The periods of self denial and exercise are far more than most people ever endure. I have also enjoyed the times when I have got into the zone and eating well and going to gym etc has been easy and something that has become a pleasant daily ritual... and I believe that 'yes, I can do this for the rest of my life'. But life long habits are insidious... and creep stealthily back... and before I know it... here I am... asking for some advice from you guys because I honestly don't know what to do anymore.

I wish I could get my band filled more without the painful and scary side effects.

I wish I could maintain control as an ongoing thing rather than in spurts.

I wish I wasn't failing... and no matter how you dress it that's what I'm doing.

I know I have to climb back on the will power horse and just do it.

I just feel like I'm on this endless cycle. I hoped before I got banded that I would be able to break the cycle. I was wrong.

Thanks for listening.

SkyLily, we are in agreement. That was exactly the point that I was trying to get across initially although it seems some may have misinterpreted that.

Research can have good and bad points as well. There are many things I have learnt from this site that I did not learn from my Dr. Some good , some bad.

One thing I kept coming across here that led to some very unrealistic expectations was the term " sweet spot". Personally I think this should be banned. The Quest for some elusive magical "sweet spot" is what often causes people to have there bands overfilled which in turn leads to other problems. I do not believe that it is possible to eat 1/2 - 1 cup of food 3 times per day and not be hungry in between. I eat far more than that and still need a snack in between. If more people realised that being hungry 3 hours after a small healthy meal was quite normal they may not get so despondent.

I sure do agree about the sweet spot. Chasing that is like looking for a pot of gold at the rainbow's end.

I come across this link http://drsimpson.net/fills/Lap-band-eating/lap-band-not-restriction/lap-band-and-restriction.html in another post on the site which I found a worthwhile read and whilst I don't agree with the whole article there were some points that I found very helpful to consider.

After the past few days on the five day plan I have decided to proceed like this... eat a small amount whenever I am hungry. I agree with you.... 1 cup of food three times a day is unsustainable. I'm just gonna have half to a full cup when my body tells me to... not my mind lol. I'm gonna listen properly and make sure I am really hungry. I am not going to let myself become ravenous just to stick to three times a day because that to me is self defeating. I am doing a food diary now and as long as I stick to about 1000 cals a day give or take a bit, then I will be doing well I think.

SkyLily, we are in agreement. That was exactly the point that I was trying to get across initially although it seems some may have misinterpreted that.

Research can have good and bad points as well. There are many things I have learnt from this site that I did not learn from my Dr. Some good , some bad.

One thing I kept coming across here that led to some very unrealistic expectations was the term " sweet spot". Personally I think this should be banned. The Quest for some elusive magical "sweet spot" is what often causes people to have there bands overfilled which in turn leads to other problems. I do not believe that it is possible to eat 1/2 - 1 cup of food 3 times per day and not be hungry in between. I eat far more than that and still need a snack in between. If more people realised that being hungry 3 hours after a small healthy meal was quite normal they may not get so despondent.

mmmmmmmmmmmmm pizza

yes one kilo = 2.2 lbs... so I lost 6.6 lbs

Thanks for your kind words, you're such a sweetie.

I agree, it's much better listening to somebody who has walked the walk... not some skinny minny with the metabolism of a hummingbird. (I just googled which animal has the fastest metabolism and it is that beautiful little bird... there you go, a bit of trivia for you lol).

Don't let miss cat bum lips put you off from getting a fill though. You're STRONGER than that.

Hope you're feeling a little better when you wake up and read this.

SkyLily xox

Hey SL

3 kilos...wow, that's more than 6 pounds, isn't it? That's great and it's just the beginning. In just a few months you will get to have that chin/neck work done, and I've heard it's not nearly as painful as the face. I will try to get back on it tomorrow or Monday...am taking a variety of antibiotics, anti-virals, prednisone, etc. for this surgery, and I think it is plumping me up even more. I just ate pizza, because I was too lazy to cook tonight for my husband and me. Not a good thing to eat, for any reason. I want regular reports on how you're doing...your courage and strength will help me and others. I may even get another fill toward the end of July, but I have to lose a few pounds first, because I don't like the looks of disdain I get from the RN who does my fills, when I gain weight. She looks like Olive Oil, and I want to hit her, because she has to drink those damn shakes to GAIN weight. It's difficult to listen to someone like that preaching about losing weight. My doctor's office is full of young, low-paid clerks who have never been over weight either.

Anyway, good luck this week; I know you will do well. Let me hear from you.

Sincerely,

Your very swollen and bruised friend, Grandy.

Dear SkyLily,

Thank you for your words of wisdom. I thoroughly enjoy reading your posts! I am going to a local support group to listen and gather information this week. I'll be sure to send an update! I wish you the best!

Hi SL

Well, I look even better this morning...the bruising completely covers the area below my eyes. I told my husband that if he didn't act right, I was going to tell everyone he beat me up!!! 6.6 pounds in 5 days is wonderful. You are getting back on track and I am proud of you. I know that if we work out more, we too, can be like the little hummingbird, since workouts increase the metabolism. Let's shoot for that...I have to wait a week, but after that, I will have no good excuse but laziness!!! It is Father's Day in the US and I am taking my 85 year old dad a walker that has a seat on it. He is getting frail and gets faint when he stands or walks for long periods of time; this will stabilize him and help him not to fall. I know he will be too proud to use it for a while, and then he will have no choice. Old age is so sad; even if you're thin and in good shape, you still can't stop the effects of it. Well, I'm off for now...need to do something with this hair that I have ignored for a couple of days; my husband keeps threatening to take my picture and put in on FB, if I don't comb it!!!!

Take care, work out and lose that weight, SL. You can do it!

Grandy

mmmmmmmmmmmmm pizza

yes one kilo = 2.2 lbs... so I lost 6.6 lbs

Thanks for your kind words, you're such a sweetie.

I agree, it's much better listening to somebody who has walked the walk... not some skinny minny with the metabolism of a hummingbird. (I just googled which animal has the fastest metabolism and it is that beautiful little bird... there you go, a bit of trivia for you lol).

Don't let miss cat bum lips put you off from getting a fill though. You're STRONGER than that.

Hope you're feeling a little better when you wake up and read this.

SkyLily xox

awwww you're welcome... thanks. xxx

PLEASE DO keep me updated.

xox

Dear SkyLily,

Thank you for your words of wisdom. I thoroughly enjoy reading your posts! I am going to a local support group to listen and gather information this week. I'll be sure to send an update! I wish you the best!

Hi Grandy, what did your dad think of his chair?

You're right, old age is mostly just sad, that's why we need to live in the moment as much as we can each and every day.

I love life and hopefully shedding some weight and getting fitter will give me a few extra good years to enjoy it.

Do you still look like a panda today?

Hope you feel a bit brighter today.

xox

PS I put back on 300 or 400 grams (half a lb or so) when I weighed this morning... what did I tell you about hitting the stupid starvation mode ultra quick. My body gets used to low calories tooooooo fast. Over the five days I was doing between 800 and 1100 cals a day. Yesterday I did 1200. BIG DEAL lol. So today I am just doing liquids again. Ridiculous! I know I probably shouldn't but this is what happens when you get your mind set again.

Hi SL

Well, I look even better this morning...the bruising completely covers the area below my eyes. I told my husband that if he didn't act right, I was going to tell everyone he beat me up!!! 6.6 pounds in 5 days is wonderful. You are getting back on track and I am proud of you. I know that if we work out more, we too, can be like the little hummingbird, since workouts increase the metabolism. Let's shoot for that...I have to wait a week, but after that, I will have no good excuse but laziness!!! It is Father's Day in the US and I am taking my 85 year old dad a walker that has a seat on it. He is getting frail and gets faint when he stands or walks for long periods of time; this will stabilize him and help him not to fall. I know he will be too proud to use it for a while, and then he will have no choice. Old age is so sad; even if you're thin and in good shape, you still can't stop the effects of it. Well, I'm off for now...need to do something with this hair that I have ignored for a couple of days; my husband keeps threatening to take my picture and put in on FB, if I don't comb it!!!!

Take care, work out and lose that weight, SL. You can do it!

Grandy

Hi Sky!

I STILL look like a Panda today, more specifically, a panda that has been a few rounds with Mike Tyson. Dad liked his Rollator/Walker; he will probably use it when he goes to the store. I ordered one today for his 88 year old sister; she is only 4'11", so we had to get her a Junior Walker!!!! Old age is sad, but they are real troopers! It is a blessing to me that they live together and look after each other; I don't worry about them as much.

It's normal to gain some ounces back after such a drastic diet as the one you were on. I hope you are doing better today. So much of that 5 day thing may be some Water weight, but it will balance out; you are doing so well! I will get back on it in a day or 2...kind of distracted and hoping that my bruising goes away before I go back to the office on Monday...didn't want to have to answer any questions...

You should be able to eat more than 1200 daily calories and not gain weight...unfortunately, our metabolism and hormones play into these things more than men. It sucks big time too!

Let me hear from you, girlfriend...I know it's Thursday morning in Australia and I hope it's a beautiful day for you. We had rain for the first time in a very long time here in Houston, so it was a welcome relief.

Take Care of yourself, and don't overdo that liquid thing...

Grandy

Hi Grandy, what did your dad think of his chair?

You're right, old age is mostly just sad, that's why we need to live in the moment as much as we can each and every day.

I love life and hopefully shedding some weight and getting fitter will give me a few extra good years to enjoy it.

Do you still look like a panda today?

Hope you feel a bit brighter today.

xox

PS I put back on 300 or 400 grams (half a lb or so) when I weighed this morning... what did I tell you about hitting the stupid starvation mode ultra quick. My body gets used to low calories tooooooo fast. Over the five days I was doing between 800 and 1100 cals a day. Yesterday I did 1200. BIG DEAL lol. So today I am just doing liquids again. Ridiculous! I know I probably shouldn't but this is what happens when you get your mind set again.

Hi Grandy

I hope you're feeling and looking quite wonderful at present.

Have thought about you the past few days and have sent positive wishes across the ocean.

Thanks for being such a lovely and encouraging person.

SkyLily xox

Hi Sky!

I STILL look like a Panda today, more specifically, a panda that has been a few rounds with Mike Tyson. Dad liked his Rollator/Walker; he will probably use it when he goes to the store. I ordered one today for his 88 year old sister; she is only 4'11", so we had to get her a Junior Walker!!!! Old age is sad, but they are real troopers! It is a blessing to me that they live together and look after each other; I don't worry about them as much.

It's normal to gain some ounces back after such a drastic diet as the one you were on. I hope you are doing better today. So much of that 5 day thing may be some Water weight, but it will balance out; you are doing so well! I will get back on it in a day or 2...kind of distracted and hoping that my bruising goes away before I go back to the office on Monday...didn't want to have to answer any questions...

You should be able to eat more than 1200 daily calories and not gain weight...unfortunately, our metabolism and hormones play into these things more than men. It sucks big time too!

Let me hear from you, girlfriend...I know it's Thursday morning in Australia and I hope it's a beautiful day for you. We had rain for the first time in a very long time here in Houston, so it was a welcome relief.

Take Care of yourself, and don't overdo that liquid thing...

Grandy

Hi SL

I sent you an email previously today through another site, but not sure you got it. I clearly still don't know what I'm doing. Thanks for your well wishes. I hope you're doing wonderfully well on your diet...I am still not focused yet. All of the possible, but rare complications appear to be hitting me, quite literally, in the face right now. The bruising is down, do I don't look so much like Panda anymore. The swelling, visual disturbances and now a small scar tissue tumor behind my left lower eye lid are quite troubling. They are supposed to work on the "granuloma" next Wed. They also told me not to fill my eye glass prescription yet, because changes in vision often occur. When one signs the list of complications on the release form just before surgery, one seldom has to worry about all of these things...It's just like the lapband was to me...I seem to encourage odd and unusual occurrences, Sky

It's July 4th -- Independence Day here in the U.S. There will be fireworks and celebrations tonight, but only in the places that aren't under a ban because of the drought we are experiencing. We have forest and grass fires in multiple locations. It seems like the whole world is experiencing natural disasters and tragedies of one kind or another.

Take care of yourself, my friend, and do well on your high Protein, low carb. I know you can succeed. let me hear from you!!

Grandy

Hi Grandy

I hope you're feeling and looking quite wonderful at present.

Have thought about you the past few days and have sent positive wishes across the ocean.

Thanks for being such a lovely and encouraging person.

SkyLily xox

Hi Grandy, I have read this and found your other message.

Sorry to hear about your complications... what to say... it's just CRAP!

Hopefully in a few weeks you will be saying how glad you were to get it done after all... I sincerely hope so!

As to my DIET. I'm so over it all lol, but am plodding along. Not losing. Had to get out of the extreme mindset. It's not healthy to live like that. Yes you lose weight but at an expense to your health - mind and body.

I'm glad I did the five day thingy though because it did help decrease my appetite and I do eat less.

So I think I will actually do the first two days, just the liquids, every few weeks anyway.

I went to the appt to other surgeon but that was just a waste of time and money. He wouldn't give me any fill because I wasn't 'his patient'... I wanted to try a tiny one. He wanted me to go to his real clinic and do another swallow etc and see his dietician but it's way too far away. Anyhow, I have appt with my usual surgeon (haven't seen him for a year!) on Friday (stll an hour away) and will get him to give me a tiny fill so I can test the reaction etc.

I've actually had an awful past four weeks and have had to deal with some other stuff. I had a contraceptive called Mirena inserted a month ago and I had some terrible side effects. Depression and then extreme anxiety. Really scary stuff. So I had it removed yesterday. I think I'm getting to a point... like you... thinking bloody hell, can something just work for me like it's supposed to!

Anyhow dear woman, chin up... you will get through this current set back and will emerge looking gorgeous.

Your friend.

SkyLily xox

Hi SL

I sent you an email previously today through another site, but not sure you got it. I clearly still don't know what I'm doing. Thanks for your well wishes. I hope you're doing wonderfully well on your diet...I am still not focused yet. All of the possible, but rare complications appear to be hitting me, quite literally, in the face right now. The bruising is down, do I don't look so much like Panda anymore. The swelling, visual disturbances and now a small scar tissue tumor behind my left lower eye lid are quite troubling. They are supposed to work on the "granuloma" next Wed. They also told me not to fill my eye glass prescription yet, because changes in vision often occur. When one signs the list of complications on the release form just before surgery, one seldom has to worry about all of these things...It's just like the lapband was to me...I seem to encourage odd and unusual occurrences, Sky

It's July 4th -- Independence Day here in the U.S. There will be fireworks and celebrations tonight, but only in the places that aren't under a ban because of the drought we are experiencing. We have forest and grass fires in multiple locations. It seems like the whole world is experiencing natural disasters and tragedies of one kind or another.

Take care of yourself, my friend, and do well on your high Protein, low carb. I know you can succeed. let me hear from you!!

Grandy

PS

Happy July 4th to all my fellow American lapbanders.

Skylily,

Thanks for the Independence Day message!!! I hope your holiday was great!!! I noticed you mentioned the Mirena.. I had mine placed in February... I was a nut for about 2 weeks, after that, SMOOTH sailing!! I'm sorry it didn't work for you... I can understand where you are coming from!! I've had tons of recent respiratory problems that have nothing to do w/ my weight!! Go figure!!!! However, we must remain positive and find out what will work for us!! Something will and we will do GREAT!!! Changing a lifestyle is a huge undertaking!! But I believe you can do it!! One step, one moment, one day... at a time!!!

Hi Grandy, I have read this and found your other message.

Sorry to hear about your complications... what to say... it's just CRAP!

Hopefully in a few weeks you will be saying how glad you were to get it done after all... I sincerely hope so!

As to my DIET. I'm so over it all lol, but am plodding along. Not losing. Had to get out of the extreme mindset. It's not healthy to live like that. Yes you lose weight but at an expense to your health - mind and body.

I'm glad I did the five day thingy though because it did help decrease my appetite and I do eat less.

So I think I will actually do the first two days, just the liquids, every few weeks anyway.

I went to the appt to other surgeon but that was just a waste of time and money. He wouldn't give me any fill because I wasn't 'his patient'... I wanted to try a tiny one. He wanted me to go to his real clinic and do another swallow etc and see his dietician but it's way too far away. Anyhow, I have appt with my usual surgeon (haven't seen him for a year!) on Friday (stll an hour away) and will get him to give me a tiny fill so I can test the reaction etc.

I've actually had an awful past four weeks and have had to deal with some other stuff. I had a contraceptive called Mirena inserted a month ago and I had some terrible side effects. Depression and then extreme anxiety. Really scary stuff. So I had it removed yesterday. I think I'm getting to a point... like you... thinking bloody hell, can something just work for me like it's supposed to!

Anyhow dear woman, chin up... you will get through this current set back and will emerge looking gorgeous.

Your friend.

SkyLily xox

Hello favoredone

Thanks... I'm actually Australian so we don't get that holiday... but we did get a long weekend not long back for the Queens Birthday so I guess it balances out LOL. Not that it was her real birthday 'they' just give us a particular day.

Yeah, the Mirena... I did try to ride it out and gave it a month but it escalated and I thought NO WAY JOSE, GET THIS THING OUT!!! It's a pity it didn't suit me but oh well. I had actually been using implanon for several years with no side effects so may go back to that. Strange though, I think it uses the same 'substance'.

You poor thing suffering the respiratory problems... do you know what may be causing it?

Thanks for your positive words! I am a great believer in thinking positive... every now and then I have a lapse but I always bounce back, life's too short to mope.

SkyLily xx

Skylily,

Thanks for the Independence Day message!!! I hope your holiday was great!!! I noticed you mentioned the Mirena.. I had mine placed in February... I was a nut for about 2 weeks, after that, SMOOTH sailing!! I'm sorry it didn't work for you... I can understand where you are coming from!! I've had tons of recent respiratory problems that have nothing to do w/ my weight!! Go figure!!!! However, we must remain positive and find out what will work for us!! Something will and we will do GREAT!!! Changing a lifestyle is a huge undertaking!! But I believe you can do it!! One step, one moment, one day... at a time!!!