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feel like a failure already!



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:frown:Hi everyone. I am set for surgery on NOv 15th and I was doing well pre op with shaled and one small no carb meal and then it happened this weekend , My husband pissed me off and and I started eating! I did not go to crazy but enough that I feel like a failure and if I can not do this how can I manage the band. I have been so hungry that at times it has been so difficult....i will crave chicken thats how hungry I have been getting..and I get in a good amount of Protein. I know today I need to get back in the right state of mind and I still have another week but I feel 1- like i screwed up already and 2 like I am not even benefiting from the pre diet weight loss ......

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You shouldn't feel like a failure....this is a learning process. Right now without the band you don't have all the tools yet to make the big changes. I am getting banded today and I did cheat a few times. It wasn't a lot, but, I still felt bad. Then I realized that the other 95% of the time I did great! Look at the positive side!

I also eat whenever I am mad at my hubby....I used to actually hear myself saying that I will show him and get even fatter! Just need to find a different way to deal with feelings. I have started a journal and it does seem to help.

Hope all goes well for you.....give yourself a break!

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You know its funny how one thing (like your husband pissing you off) can open the door not only for you to eat things that are bad for you, it causes you to doubt yourself with you future band.

Don’t let…what happens is the devil finds a hole like your hubby making you mad. And he uses that to attack you in other places of your life. You are not a failure, one has nothing to do with the other. You WILL BE A SUCCESS with your band. You recognized that you made a bad food choice this time.. maybe next time it won’t be so much food and the time after that maybe you will be able to turn it down.

Keep trying, think positive and Good Luck!!!

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I agree with what everyone else has said but I just wanted to comment on your comment about not benefitting from the pre op diet. You have lost 13 pounds! That's amazing! You are definitely benefitting. When I was on my preop diet (it was 3 weeks of liquids only), seeing the pounds melting off was my motivation to stick to it. So think about how well you're doing and how much weight your losing and use that to motivate and excite you! Congrats on your success so far!

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I should change my ticker b/c some of that weight I lost before the liquid diet and just working on the process of being banded from my highest weight. I have onlt lost about 5 on th eliquid diet...i know 5 is 5! I have been bank on pre op track today though! salad and tuna for dinner and shakes the rest of the day!!! I am trying to be strong despite the very real physical hunger. Thanks all for the support!

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Hang in there, if you fall just pick yourself up and get going again! We all have our moments!

Cheri

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Hey buddy, your doing great. You had a set back oh well, don't keep feeding on that issue because your mind set needs to be in a good place. Regardless of your husband and that situation thats his problem dont make it yours. When I get pissed I either go for a walk or read the forums they help so much. Keep your head up forget that fried chicken and make your shake enjoy each sip your feel better after the shake.

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I am going to try to keep myself very busy during the day when I start my pre-op diet tomorrow. I seem to go looking for something to eat a few times a day when I'm home alone.

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You definitely have to find a way to deal with the stress...but you should realize that just RECOGNIZING that you have that trigger is the first step toward changing it. RIGHT ON! WAY TO GO! Now, the next time he pisses you off (and it will happen cuz face it...married people make each other mad at time...that's life) you will go for the kitchen as an impulse and then you will stop and say....wait...there are other ways to deal with this...

I dream of throwing a roll of TP at his head and saying..."clean up your crappy attitude" I never do it...but thinking about it makes me laugh anyway. :)

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please don't be so hard on yourself, everything will be fine...tomorrow will be a new day and we just need to start all over again, this is not an easy process, but it is worth the hard work and effort.....goodluck and welcome to the loser's bench!!!:)

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LMAO I like the throwing the toilet paper roll at his head idea!!!! My husband and I have such a rocky relationship that at times I wonder if this relationship is much of my continued battle with food. I really need to separate myself from his stuff like you guys said and not let him get to me. He is very moody and I am a people pleaser as most of us who tends to take it personla dn want to make him better while forgetting about myself. When he upsets me i stuff it down with the food . Anger is a real issue for me because I never really allow myself to feel it or respond to it. Maybe I will also start a journal and when I am really pissed write about it to get it out...I am willing to try anything. I would love ot be able to go and exercise when mad but with 2 kids it is not always an option and the food always seems to be readily available...damn the food LOL

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I think you're doing great! Keep going. Those emotional triggers will get you everytime. I don't have the answers yet. I'm new in this battle too. (11/22 is my date) and so I am learning as well. I started the liquid diet yesterday and the worst part is the Halloween candy still in the house. I feel guilty throwing it away because it's my sons, but I'm know it can't stay in my house.

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Hi Purple!

When i was reading your comment about wondering if you husband is part of the problem, I was thinking the same thing about mine. Much like you, I am the type of person who is always worring about others and doing what needs to be done to make sure that they are happy, before making sure I am! I honestly do believe that is part of why i have let my weight go. Don't get me wrong, I love my husband but I also know that I have to learn to walk away from his moods and the kitchen! I love the idea of starting a journal. I just have to make sure i let myself have the time to write in it. Just remember that you are not alone. I to have fallen off the pre-op diet and felt like you did, however, tomorrow is another day and always a fresh start! Best of luck to u !

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You mentioned journaling to get your frustrations out! I recommend Blogging! I started reading some girls blogs from here and found a whole community of support and frustration release just from starting a blog! If you are curious my link is in my signature and I have loads of different bloggers on my page! Good luck!

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