Hello everyone,

I have my first appointment with a therapist (psychologist, psycho) this coming week and we all have bad experiences in our past. I have no mental issues but did survive my parents going through a nasty divorce in which I ended up living with grandparents instead. I do work in a stressful situation (but have a job thankfully), I'm over weight and have only 1 child who is in college in IA (17 hours drive from us). Yes, there are times I am down.

I have read other threads about how others said things that hurt them in the evaluation, brought up bad feelings from the past, did not get a Good To Go clearance and caused them to return for a second visit.

I have also read in other threads about people saying what the psycho wanted to hear even though it was not quite the truth.

I want to get a "Good To Go" letter from the first visit. What do I need to avoid in saying and what do they want to hear?

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

Cathy

Basically, when mine brought up possible bad experiences, my response was "life never goes the way people expect it will, but we deal with it and move on." When she started probing for 'trauma', I pretty much told her that people have been dealing with these issues for thousands of years and it's only in recent decades that we've made a big deal out of them and using them as an excuse to behave as victims. That I don't dwell about the things that have gone wrong with my life. I deal with them and move on. Life is too short to waste time on negativity.

My eval lasted for 30 minutes and she said she wished all of her patients had that outlook.

I am a clinical psychologist and knew that 'most' will take a tiny incident from your life and blow it out of proportion. The trick is to keep them from even starting down that path. Oh, and she didn't know I was a psychologist so that had no bearing.

.

Wow- thanks for the great advice.

That is exactly what I was looking for.

Cathy

I agree and endorse ElfiePoo's comments. Just play up the positive things in your life. You do this well in your post - you 'survived' your parents divorce. You have a stressful job, but you are 'grateful' for it.

I had to write a statement about 'me', which I ended by letting the psychologist know, that I have handled trauma in my life and come out of that OK, that I have a good life, a supportive husband and family. That I am mentally strong and the WLS was something that I was going to do for me.

He told me there and then that he thought I was a good candidate for WLS.

I wish you good luck - you will been fine.

The biggest don't I can think of is choosing a psych who's not among those recommended by your surgeon. I chose one closer to home--and while he is probably a good enough therapist, he went really far afield in my evaluation. He did approve me, but my anxiety was quadrupled by the extra hoops he had me jump through.

Otherwise, don't worry about it too much---even if you DO have some emotional issues (because who doesn't?), they will not likely stand in your way. The point is to identify people for whom psychopathology is a real obstacle to compliance. You'll do fine :redface:

Thank you guys for responding so quickly. My appointment is tomorrow evening at 7. I'll let you know how things go.

Thanks again,

Cathy

Good Luck!

Dont act like so many things in your life are perfect or just so wonderful because that will tip them off that maybe you are too happy and it may send a sense of deception. They want to know you are ready and it you have the right motivation and aduqute support. Don't answer anything they don't ask you. Part of most peoples problems is they talk too much! Just relax be real an it'll all go like it should! Plus one more thing, they want to make sure you are educatef on your decision. Good luck!

Mine went very easy. I have a past also. I was hospitalized a couple of years ago; however, it wasn't because I wanted to hurt myself. I told the therapist about that. She questions like "do you take medicine?" do you know why you want this surgery?" "do you have any health problems?" stuff like that. It really wasn't bad. When she asked a question, I answered it but didn't go into much detail.

Also, I think it's safe to assume that people overweight are more likely to suffer from depression than those who are average weight. I think you will do just fine! :redface:

My experience was not a problem, either. My surgeon has a psychologist on staff, and when I met with her, there was no "grilling", per se, or a long written test that some have to take. Rather, the conversation started with a simple question, "What led you to making this decision?", and went from there.

Take heart in the fact that I've seen studies that suggest that patients who have successfully navigated difficult, stressful periods in their lives, such as divorce/remarriage, tend to have more successfull results, due to the fact that they know how adapt to drastic life changes.

When asked, the psychologist told me that her main concern is to be sure that a prospective patient has a realistic outlook about what they are about to do, that they understand that 90% of their future success depends on them, and that having this surgery will not "fix" whatever other negative things are going on in their lives.

I'm sure you'll sail through with flying colors- best of luck!

Christine:thumbup: