I have found in the last few months i am consumed with my weight lose. its like i just cant just enjoy the weight that has been coming off. I take my weight lose 10 lbs at a time. Im 247 lbs right now and i started out at 389 or 86 i cant remember any more that was at my time of pre band diet. I kicked butt to finally get to the 240's and now that i am there, i am going crazy trying to keep from going backward to the 250's. once i get to 245 or lower than I will go crazy trying to make it to the 230's. It has been going like that now for over 9 months. this cant be healthy, I would love to just be happy with where I am right now but im not sure I will be happy until i hit my goal and than I just dont want to go crazy trying to stay at that weight. When do we start being happy? Dont get me wrong I am happy with my weight lose but it like never enough. i send most of my time trying to not go backwards and still keep moving down on the scale. Right now weight is still coming off but what happens when it stops again. im not really going crazy but i am starting to be concerned about my need to not gain weight.

Papa.....hide your scale of throw it out if you have to. Make a commitment to yourself to not get on the scale more then once a week....pick a day to weigh in...and then stay away from the scale the rest of the time. You deserve to ENJOY your life, not spend it obbsessing (sp)about your weight either being fat or losing weight.

Your doing GREAT!!!! Now go out and enjoy your success!!!

Bigpapa,

I didn't have as much to lose as you have, but I do get where you're coming from. I weighed myself everyday, and despite doing well, I never really was happy with any loss I'd already had, I only worried about what I still had to lose. I knew I would not be satisfied until I got to goal.

Then I got to goal and I still wasn't as satisfied as I would have liked to be. I started to worry - was I ever going to stop obsessing?

I didn't seem to enjoy my successes, only focussed on the next goal, the next number I needed to strive for.

But in the last few weeks, I'm actually starting to get comfortable with having reached a point where I don't want to lose anymore.

It takes your mind some time to catch up, and I think that's normal. Wanting to reach goal, and being single-minded about it, in one way, though obsessive, also shows your incredible commitment to this change in your life.

Try to take the time to smell the roses, but I actually admire your determination, and I think these last few lbs will be gone in a matter of months, and you will have the time then to adjust and allow your psyche to catch up with your success.

Boy, did I need to read this thread!!! I am one month post surgery, lost 15 preop and 10 in the first week after surgery, and have been maintaining ever since.

I've been obsessed about the scale numbers as well. I know this is a time for healing, I've read it on the boards for months, but then I see others at about the same stage as me and they are losing and I think what am I doing wrong??? (First fill scheduled for next week). I finally put my food scale and journal away - I was obsessing about how many calories I was eating, how much Protein I was getting in, how much Water, etc. BUT I haven't been able to get away from daily weigh-ins.

I think Monica's (sp?) post said what I needed to hear - you deserve to just enjoy life and quit obsessing. So I'll continue with my smaller portions until I have more restriction, be more dedicated to faithful exercise, keep off the scale except for once a week, and just enjoy the changes I have already noticed.

Thanks so much for posting this BigPapa - and congrats on what you have accomplished!!

Bambam....I'm sooo happy to hear that something I said stuck a cord. I was also jumping on the scale every day atleast once.....Always a little disappointed that it was moving down everytime I got on. I think we should pick a day and weigh and then not touch the scales the rest of the week!!

We all made this decision to CHANGE OUR LIVES.....so I say lets do it...lets stop being so obsessed, yes be

conscious and vigilant about what we are eating, but not to the point of obsession. This is supposed to be our chance at freedom....lets not let it slip through our fingers....going from being unhappy about being fat to unhappy about not losing weight fast enough....faster is not always better, and there are folks here that can atest to that.

So when't our weigh-in day....we'll start a thread for all the other obsessors that deserve some freedom from the scales....lol

Maybe think short term instead of long term. I thought I would be obsessive with it too but since I am a slow loser I have gotten over it already. I get so excited when I go to my monthly appointments and I have lost. This past 2 months I have only lost 14.2lbs my office had me so excited I didn't know what to do with myself and I thrived off of the accomplishment that I did make, if I were you (as I started off at the same weight as you) I have only lost 60lbs in 10 MONTHS! But I am content as you should be too! Toot your horn baby you have come along way quit worring about the future live the present and be happy you have done a GOOD JOB!!!!!! GO big PAPA!!!!!!!!!

Big Momma I too only weigh once a week it's on MONDAYS and yes the scale is right in the bathroom I see it everytime I go in there, but I have such a good will power of not jumping on it everytime I think aobut my band, I just wished I had that will power with eating but oh well...I do'nt think about the weight loss as much as I thought I did, it's not my number one priority anymore it's weird...I do think of all the things I wil be able to do later like rides the rides at the amusement park with my grandson, and going on trips I think that is what keeps me going...

I think we all obsess once we start to lose the weight and want to reach that goal that we have set for ourselves. I am 3 pounds short of hitting the 100 pound mark and when I went for my fill this week I was so disappointed that I only lost 7 pounds. I mentioned to my doctor that we have been socializing more lately and if I didn't have those glasses of wine or drinks I might have lost the extra 3 lbs and reached my goal. My dr thought I was being too hard on myself and she said that what I am doing is living my life and if I didn't satisfy a craving or have that glass of wine I will go back to the way I was before. As long as I am aware of what I am eating and not overindulging and I continue to lose I am on the right track. So that be hard on yourself, look how far you have come. You are doing a great job.

That is exactly what my doctor said when I was disappointed when only losing 8lbs one month he said look at your accomplishments you have every reason to be happy not disappointed!

Thank you all for all of your support, i will try to enjoy the roses more, will try to not weigh my self every day but its hard because i just dont want to have a set back and not know it until i gain 5 lbs. If i start to gain I want to know it at 2 or 3 lbs. I have not weighed myself before and found out I gained 5 or more pounds and than I had to work even harder to just get back at my same I was at. I might of lose 140 lbs in the last 9 months but I have gained weight also and had to lose it again. So accourse in my head I would be even lighter if i hadden of gained those lbs when I was weighing myself every day.

Funny how our heads like to play those games with us isn't it Papa...lol

I understand where you are coming from, but at the same time you have to realize our weight fluctates *sp every day, I don't know the # for men but they say for women as much as 8lbs.....

You know you know how to eat right otherwise you wouldn't have had the success you have had to date. I think the hardest thing for all of us to do is learn to TRUST OURSELVES, trust that you are making wise food choices excersising portion control and remaining physically active. If you are doing all those things I truly doubt 5lbs of fat is going to sneak up on you, but it's not unheard of for 5lbs of Fluid to sneak up on you, and you shouldn't be beating yourself up for things beyond your control.

We are all here to cheer you on!!

Funny -- I just was thinking about the daily-weighing issue and posted about it on my blog. I think it's fine to weigh yourself every day. . but only as long as you can keep it in perspective.

Big Papa, I do a daily weigh-in for the same reason as you mentioned -- to make sure I'm not gaining (and to stay on top of how I am doing). But, I keep in mind that my weight bounces around a bit before I lose, and remind myself that when it stays the same for a few days, that means that the previous pounds are really gone for good. This is helpful for me because it keeps me from being anxious or feeling bad because I don't lose every single day.

Anyway, Big Poppa, you are doing great! 139 lbs lost is AMAZING!! :sneaky: You have already come so far, and I hope you will remember to give yourself the credit you are due for that!

Catherine

You've done fantastic! Don't get frustrated, trust me, other people are in the same boat as you are. Like say, me. I've dropped to a size 8, which is supposedly 'perfect' for my height, but I still can't even get past wearing baggy clothes. One of my friends had to lend me a shirt because mine got paint on it while working and she couldn't believe my shape...I still don't wear short skirts or even knee length skirts..I don't even think I own any! I still see myself as big and I just want to keep losing until I see myself as thin..I might have to go see someone, actually...o.o Good Luck!!

Thank you all so much for your replys, they have all helped me greatly.

Hi, papa -- i won't call you bigpapa anymore. You have done fantastic! I was banded 3/27/09 and am doing fantastic! I will be 70 years young next month. My starting weight was 305 and i am down to 277. I wanted to respond to you by telling you that one of the mind-set changes i know i had to make was to stay off the scale. I was a slave to the scale. And i allowed my day to be happy or depressed by what the scale reported. What a farce! What a waste of precious time and life! It is very rare now that i weigh once a week. Usually i weigh once every two weeks. That way you don't know what day it was that you stayed the same or for how long, etc., etc. Believe me, it has made a difference in my life. The scale is only a tool for me now, just as the band is a tool. I am the one in control. You take care and know that you are an inspiration to the rest of us.

Cheers,

pat (pattyrich)

BigMomma -

Thanks to your post I was able to get away from daily weigh-ins. My main weigh in day is Wed and to be honest I still weigh on Saturday, - midweek, just to make sure something crazy hasn't happened, but I had my first fill 2 weeks ago and am beginning to have faith in the process, so I see myself weighing only on Wed before long. I don't journal anything. I do keep an idea of my calories and Protein in my head, but to be honest I know about what I'm eating each day and while my food choices vary from day to day, I'm still eating about the same amount of protein, etc., so even that is a mute point.

It feels awesome not to be chained to a journal, etc any longer. And weighing only 2 times a week is a victory for me!!! Baby steps.... soon only weighing on Wed.

Thanks again!