I went to my regular dietician today because I am still waiting for my first appointment date. We talked a lot about what to do when hunger strikes and you know you shouldn't really be hungry.. She said I needed to have a "basket full" of things to sidetrack my thoughts. Things that make ME calm and happy, reading, walking, scrapbooking etc.. We also talked about the EGO part of the brain,, the voice in your head that makes you worry or overthink things, obsess about food and diet to a point where you just give in.. She said when you are in a relaxed mood, doing something calming that makes you happy that voice stays quiet and in the back of your mind. I have come to recognize that its anxiety and stress that makes me overeat. I clean when angry and shut down and sleep when depressed,, but when I am worried or anxious I head to the fridge. I have had a lot of stress in my life for the past 15 years with little to no refuge from it at all.. Yesterday I was worried about my husband driving in bad weather to take my daughter to Grandmas, and pick my son up and bring him home. Our vehicle started having issues and hubby made the mistake of telling me. I was worried all afternoon for the 4 hours he was gone.. I had just eaten a Lean Cuisine meal, and had a horrible time staying away from the fridge. Once they got home we had dinner and I inhaled my food and felt like total crap, and then had a bad case of reflux.. I don't want to keep going through that so I am getting my "basket" prepared and writing my alternatives down in a journal.

She mentioned that a study done on gastric bypass patients showed a large percentage of people who were not counseled before surgery or who never dealt with their inner eating issues turned their need for food into a need for alcohol, drugs, sex and other addictions. That is a very scarey thought and I don't want it to happen to me!

What is your new Focus??

I try to keep myself busy. I too am an emotional eater. Stress triggers my "snacker". The best way for me to fight it is to talk to myself. Literally. I had a knife getting ready to cut a piece of carrott cake, and asked myself, "Leslie - do you REALLY want this or are you just bored?" I didn't cut it...I wasn't really hungry.

....She said when you are in a relaxed mood, doing something calming that makes you happy that voice stays quiet and in the back of your mind. .....What is your new Focus??

Wicked, My nutritionist practically said the same thing--however she did focus more on being active--and told me to watch for anything that may turn my focus to those bad things you mentioned.

My focus has been going to online sites such as this one. I really love the interaction you can have with some of the people on them. There are a lot out there. This is one of the easiest ones to use, but there are others out there that are different. It is really a personal choice.

My best advice is for you to read, read, and then read some more about your new lapband. There is a lot of information out there and there are a lot of informative people that are more than willing to share their experiences and knowledge. But more importantly, keep the lines of communication open with all of your Drs and nutritionist/dietician. They are the experts and can help you the most.

I find if I suddenly get bit picky, if I can distract myself for 20 minutes (there's ALWAYS housework to be done) then it does pass.

My focus has turned to pleasure reading (I used to love reading, but didn't read much for 3 years after my daughter was born), and exercising to help replace food. I'm a major boredom, stress, and emotional eater.

Unfortuantely, I have noticed a new behavior. When I used to go out grocery shopping or whatever, I would "reward" myself with some type of sweet food item. Now that I can't do that anymore, I find that I am buying a lot of little non-food items to get that same instant happy feeling. I've come home with a million shades of nail polish, and a lot of other crap I don't need, but made me happy at the time of purchase.

On the other hand, I have basically ignored myself and my wants for the past 5 years, and now that I'm focusing on myself and taking care of myself maybe that could be why I'm buying little nail polish/hair brush/barret type items for me...

I'm an emotional eater as well...but talking to myself helps open the door to do other things besides go grab a snack like I used to. I keep a jug of water with me at all times to drink if I feel hungry. I've learned sometimes when we don't drink enough water, our bodies sense "hunger" when it's really thirst. I also try to write down what I'm feeling, why I want to eat, and what will happen after I eat. Usually it's not good. And after pre-op I lost about 10lbs before surgery, and I was thinking if I eat like this again I will gain the weight back. So I focus on the new clothes I want to buy, the shoes I want, and how eating like I should will help get me there. Now every now and then I will have a small cup of ice cream, or a cookie, but only after I balance my meals for the day so I don't overdo it. It's hard to say, but you start to feel different about food.

Hopefulmom,, I have been getting an pedicure and manicure about every 6 to 8 weeks.. its not always in the budget but I too have ignored myself since having kids. I also started wearing makeup daily again, and because I hate spending time on my hair (and don't have time to) I got a short messy cut thats easy to deal with and still a little stylish. I also used to reward myself with food items for things accomplished, (inherited from my mother) I stopped doing it with my kids last year, but just realized lately I was doing it for myself... I grab a magazine or a book instead of something to eat..

Enigma... Someone else told me recently to start dreaming about what you want to do when you lose the weight, or a wish list of things you want to do or accomplish. Like a pair of jeans that fit, go dancing without being self conscious,, playing with my kids without wanting to die!!

You have all done amazing things,, thanks for the feedback!

This is a really good thread! I am going to try to put together some things to shift my focus to before my surgery. I am an emotional eater also and I have been trying to think about better ways to handle this besides eating when I am stressed.