Okay I'm looking for your tips and personal experiences on the best approach to ordering in a public place. I am not telling my co-workers and my family (I have close friends that support me in a positive way) so when the time comes and we go somewhere, how to I do I order without a zillion questions? I don't want to attract attention but yet I don't want to come home with mega leftovers. Has anyone called the restaurant in advance and told them to be prepared that you would be ordering small quantities and have they been able to adjust the order? I know that there will be times when it's "doable" to order appetizers but what if I'm out with family at christmas and I want the grilled salmon, veggies and baked potato but can only eat a third of it - I have NEVER left with a doggie bag, oh my....red flag situation. Then the gals like to go out for cheesecake and drinks - would anyone actually order 1/2 a slice of cake? Please share your ideas with me, thanks :biggrin2:

Okay I'm looking for your tips and personal experiences on the best approach to ordering in a public place. I am not telling my co-workers and my family (I have close friends that support me in a positive way) so when the time comes and we go somewhere, how to I do I order without a zillion questions? I don't want to attract attention but yet I don't want to come home with mega leftovers. Has anyone called the restaurant in advance and told them to be prepared that you would be ordering small quantities and have they been able to adjust the order? I know that there will be times when it's "doable" to order appetizers but what if I'm out with family at christmas and I want the grilled salmon, veggies and baked potato but can only eat a third of it - I have NEVER left with a doggie bag, oh my....red flag situation. Then the gals like to go out for cheesecake and drinks - would anyone actually order 1/2 a slice of cake? Please share your ideas with me, thanks :biggrin2:

Are you telling people your "dieting" at least ?

Your going to have to try a few things I think . I dont know that I would call ahead .

btu this is what I do .

1. Order from the kids menu .

2. Order a "Regular' meal and get the 2 go box WITH The meal but half the meal in the to go box before you even eat it .

3. order an appetizer .

4. eat wht you can / want from the regular menu and leave the rest.

If you do that i would HIGHLY Suggest as soon as your finished telling the waiter to take your plate !

Honestly Its none of anyone's business if you take a doggie bag home or not . But they are going to see that your losing weight. So saying something like " Im tryhing to eat less or eat better" is a good option for ordering differently . Would i go order half a slice of cheesecake ?

If that's ALL we were eating ? Probably . But I would not make a habit of it .

HTH

Mindy

I too fooled myself from the start that I would pull this off... However, everyone has noticed lol. I would order a club with fries and a coke and eat it all.. Now I order a Soup and eat 1/2 of it and no bread LOL They only buy it so many times.

You can try the

1) Oh I just ate

2) I am not that hungry

3) I am dieting

4) My stomach doesn't feel that great

really how long are they gonna buythat for?

I found out right away at the place I go out to eat if I told them up front I had the surgery they make me a plate for $2! I love it.. The owner asked all kinds of questions about my band and she couldnt weight 100 pounds lol.

I Just decided to embrace it as I have nothing to be ashamed of "getting healthy"

if you can order a half-portion, that's always good. i've notced a lot of the restaurants with HUGE portions are now offering half portions right on the menu (claim jumper comes to mind), and although these half portions are what a normal person MIGHT be able to eat, cute that in a third or half, and that's it. kids menu might be an idea, but honestly, most kids menus are all crap food, so it's deep friend or macncheese or whatever. not to say you shouldn't give it a try though.

on the idea of not telling people... i have pulled this off for almost 3 years. a couple of people i know who have the band know about mine, but family? nope. friends? nope (with exception of one). new people i just meet here and there? nope. i have on occasion tested out my "telling" people with newer friends, and have had an ok response... but honestly, some people are still weird about it. i figure that's their problem. my body and my life is my business. so i keep my band to myself (that's just me).

ALL my friends, family, coworkers, etc... know i watch what i eat "very closely" but more in the areas of portion control and not having soda and stuff like that... and everyone knows i have lost a bunch of weight. but that's where it ends.

anyways, you'll figure out what works for you. honestly, when i go out to a lunch or dinner, which i have to go out to quite often, i usually order like normal, for the most part, and toss the rest. i eat only a little bit. i know this seems like a big waste of money and food, but after a while, you won't feel guilty about leaving the food... you'll be happy it's there on the plate, and not on your booty! :thumbup:

almost forgot... people around you WILL start to ask all the "how'd you do it" questions... i tell them that i watch what i eat and exercise, that i only drink Water and tea (no sugar), and that's it. there doesn't seem to be a lot of argument or questioning of that, as the people around me can see this is true.

best wishes! :thumbup::thumbup:

I would just order a small regular meal & eat about half if u can, then get a doggy bag for the next day.

You all have such great ideas!! I think I will try a variation of all of them and see which works best, depending on who I'm eating with. I like the idea of getting appetizers but sometimes this doesn't work when you want to get chicken/fish into the meal, I think it would break my heart to throw food away (but may do so if there is only a small portion left say from an appetizer versus a main meal) so I would definately try to talk with the hostess before then with my smaller meal I could take a doggie bag home. When it comes to my co-workers they know I've been on weight watchers but have "fallen off the wagon" so I know I'd start getting the usual response when I'm eating my brown bagged lunch or smaller portions - "oooh your so good". But for family some of them have done the weight watchers thing and have been successful, (so have I but then the weight comes back with all its little friends). I know family will not be supportive, at least in the begining, but if I can casually brush off the odd situations at least for the first year then perhaps they will be more understanding when they see the results and how it has changed my life. Luckily I have learned some great avoidance techniques from weight watchers, like "oh, I ate something beforehand so I wouldn't pig out" or "i'm really trying to cut back", usually these work. As for cheesecake, YUM, I hope that I will still be able to handle the rare treat and the girls only do this maybe once a year. All in all I think people will just guess that I've finally decided to get healthy again or have rejoined weight waters, so that is in my favor, as I am not yet comfortable sharing this part of my life.

You all have such great ideas!! I think I will try a variation of all of them and see which works best, depending on who I'm eating with. I like the idea of getting appetizers but sometimes this doesn't work when you want to get chicken/fish into the meal, I think it would break my heart to throw food away (but may do so if there is only a small portion left say from an appetizer versus a main meal) so I would definately try to talk with the hostess before then with my smaller meal I could take a doggie bag home. When it comes to my co-workers they know I've been on weight watchers but have "fallen off the wagon" so I know I'd start getting the usual response when I'm eating my brown bagged lunch or smaller portions - "oooh your so good". But for family some of them have done the weight watchers thing and have been successful, (so have I but then the weight comes back with all its little friends). I know family will not be supportive, at least in the begining, but if I can casually brush off the odd situations at least for the first year then perhaps they will be more understanding when they see the results and how it has changed my life. Luckily I have learned some great avoidance techniques from weight watchers, like "oh, I ate something beforehand so I wouldn't pig out" or "i'm really trying to cut back", usually these work. As for cheesecake, YUM, I hope that I will still be able to handle the rare treat and the girls only do this maybe once a year. All in all I think people will just guess that I've finally decided to get healthy again or have rejoined weight waters, so that is in my favor, as I am not yet comfortable sharing this part of my life.

After you have been banded for a while you WILL be able to throw food away TRUST Me . I know its hard to believe now but after your banded food is just food. Its no longer the SCRUMPTIOUS peice of cake or fish or what ever, its just food. you eat to live not live to eat.

So telling the waitress, take my plate im done when half of it is still there is not a big deal .

I know this wont make a difference but Stop caring what others think or feel or say ! your not doing this for them , your diong it for yourself.

People get use to being around us fat and we are the "fat friend" and EXCPECT us to be the piggies at the table. When that changes THEY are the ones that are uncomfortable it makes THEM self concious. SCREW THAT ! You are not having lap band surgery for your friends , your doing it for yourself. So if you want to eat half a plate of food and tell the waitress to toss the other half screw everyone else and what they think .

People will notice TRUST ME . But who cares. Does not mean you have to tell them you had surgery . But does not mean you have to hide weight loss success either !!

Good luck

Love

Mindy

Most of my friends don't know I have the surgery. Only my close family and about 5 friends are in on the secret. When I go out to eat, I usually try to order a regular meal with a take home box. I've been on a perpetual life long diet so no one questions me on getting the "to go" box. I Then put most of my meal in th box and leave enough on my plate to have a decent sized meal.

I still have problems with throwing food out. I find that I "collect" food now when I go out. For example, I went to a BBQ yesterday and saw lots of things that I wanted but knew I couldn't fit into my pouch. I ended up taking food home and having some for lunch today. I will probably get 3 or 4 more meals out of the leftovers and I won't have to cook anything but veggies to go with it.

If your going to do the take home box thing at restaurants , especially when newly banded, I really recommend getting the to go box WITH your meal , when it comes out and taking only what you can eat , putting the rest in the box and putting it a side. If you do not , early on , its REALLY easy to over eat and get stuck and getting stuck in public is NOT fun , Espically if your trying to hide it .

I still do this just do i dont sit there and "pick" at my food when im done .

HTH

Minedy

Great advice Mindy. I know that I'm having the surgery for ME but I've always had difficulty with getting acceptance from others and don't like it when people don't like me.....it reminds me of that funny episode of Friends where Monica fogot to invite Rachel's mom to the baby shower and she ran around trying to get her forgiveness :tt2: I think because I've lived with the fat struggle my whole life, that my self confidence is not as high as it should be, and I am really trying to do what is best for ME and let go of what others think.....I'm a work in progress but will eventually turn into that grand picaso painting. I appreciate the lending ear and sharing my thoughts/feelings on this site. With regard to the food I simply loooove the BBQ idea and taking a variety leftover plate home! Next time I go to a family thing I will most definately take a doggie bag so I can enjoy a few more meals :thumbup:

Good Advice Colton. I was at a restaurant the other nite with another friend who also has a band. We picked at our food after knowing we were full. We both ended up getting a doggie bag but we should have gotten them at the start of our meals. I have to try to remember to follow this rule every time I go out because it saves us before we can go over board.

Another thing I always liked about having a "to go" box....It reminds me the next day of the great meal I had the day before!

It makes alot of sense to get the box with your meal and I'm sure I would be one of those people that picked at it, even though I would already be full. I like the idea of having leftovers, yeah no cooking and no dishes!