Why are YOU Fat?

[Vikki 2]

well, i am fat because i cant just have a "little" bit of food. i have massive quantities at once and eat well beyond the feeling of fullness. i hope all this is in the past after my surgery

Yes it will pass and I soooooo understand what you are feeling. This is the exact reason why I got the band in the first place. This is what will happen to you. I am almost at my year anniversary and I barely eat anymore..................and I am totally okay with it. I mean compared to the portion size I used to eat it is amazing the difference in my life style. I used to wake up and get a Breakfast burrito......I do miss those.......then go to lunch and super size it......then have dinner with garlic bread a side salad and dessert. Don't forget the many Snacks threw out the day. I tried so hard to have will power but the will power was not helping me get the weight off it just seem to go up and up and up. I felt the only way to get in control was to FORCE my body to stop sabitoshing myself and then deal with the guilt of bad choses threw out the day and eat way too much. I had a huge appitite and would feel full for a very short time. Once you get your band you will not feel very hungry at first but as soon as your stomach heals from the surgery your hunger will start creaping back. You will wait about 6 weeks for your first fill. You will feel a little discouraged at first because once your stomach heals you will start to eat again and not feel too much of a difference and think to yourself I thought this was going to change. It won't until you get the correct fill for your body. Some feel the restriction the first fill and others it takes awhile. I didn't feel true restriction until my last fill and I really feel the restriction now. It took me awhile to change my head to be okay with just a few bites. Your body to your brain makes you change your mind about eating because now it is hard to get food down. You are hungry but you can only eat few things that will go down with out pain. I still struggle with it and just start eating something and start to feel the pouch above my band start to feel tight and you instantly STOP what your eating and wait to see if it is going to go down. It it does not and sits on top of the band you will start feeling like you need to get it back up and have to be by a bathroom or something in case. Believe me you have this happen many times so start feeling like its not worth it. Food is not worth the hassle. You start thinking a lot different about what you need in your body and to give it nutrients not just food satisfaction. A protien shake or a yogart for your meal. And feel full and okay with it. I don't struggle with that little voice beating myself up anymore that I was a bad girl and ate that garlic bread or bag of chips because it is a no no now. I can eat chips but I have to eat them slow and chew chew so after about the sixth chip I feel that i am done and put them down. I could never have done that before...............................It will be better but it does take awhile to get to the place of peace with in yourself and that the light is close at the end of that tunnel. Good luck to you guys that are going to get your band. It is the best decision I have ever made for myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[kathystrick 3]

Wow Vikki...thanks for being so honest. You hear so many people only saying in a lot of the threads how great the band is but not talking about their continued struggles with and because of it. Thank you for opening up.

Kathy

[Vikki 2]

Wow Vikki...thanks for being so honest. You hear so many people only saying in a lot of the threads how great the band is but not talking about their continued struggles with and because of it. Thank you for opening up.

Kathy

Your very welcome. I instant message others on the threads sometimes asking how the have gotten 100 off and kept it off. What has worked for them. This whole year since my band has been like a re birth of me. It is like you reach rock bottom and getting the band is hope to get better. That is the way I felt anyway. It is not the quick easy answer to loose the weight and keep it off at all. You can eat ice cream and chocolates all day and still gain the weight. It is a matter of figuring out what works for your body and everyone has there own suggestions but it might now work for you. The thing people don't understand is it is not easy by any means to get the band then loose weight and poof you look just like Pamela Anderson..............NOT!!! You still struggle everyday to stay on track with calories and exercise. You just can't eat and eat and eat so easily that you used too. When something is a hassle it really makes you rethink it. Train yourself to just skip it completely and be okay with it. That is the great thing about the band when it comes to becoming a better you is finding that inner peace to be rid of the food addiction. I started off with overeater annonomous and that helped too.

I struggle with being bitter about why others can eat a whale everyday and be a size 2 and I struggle just to be around my weight range on eating very little. I know I am from an obese family so that is not in my favor but when you have to work so hard at something that others don't even think twice about can make you a tad bitter. I live in So Cal so there are sticks all over the place and I just look at them in their size 2 jeans and think to myself........WHY ME!! But I have gotten a lot better and that is part of the inner peace with being happy with ME!!

Have a great day!!!!!!

[BJean 16]

kathys: you've gone to your seminar, I guess? I hope it was a good one and answered a lot of your questions.

One of the things they told us, over and over and over, is that the band is just a "tool" and that we still have to exercise self-control. I didn't really listen. I thought that it would be easier. I am disappointed that after a year with the band, I am not slimmer. Another thing they told me, over and over, is that this is a two-year process.

Well, I have to stop feeling disappointed and start realizing that I am way ahead of the game than when I started this process. Although you hear many of the same things over and over on this forum, it is interesting to know that we really are individuals with different approaches and success rates.

It's important that we not judge ourselves by other people's progress - just be inspired by them.

Good luck to you on your journey. Believe in yourself and take good care of yourself and in spite of past failures in weight loss, have faith that you will be normal again. Allow yourself 2 years in which to accomplish your goals. You can do it, honest you can!

I don't mean to sound preachy, just supportive and sharing. It is a journey filled with many ups and downs. But for practically everyone who posts here, we're glad we have the band tool.

[BJean 16]

Vikki- that was a great post! Thanks. Living in So. Cal has to be tough if you're overweight. Everyone is trying so hard to look like movie stars. I just got back from L.A. and felt the discrimination, that is very real.

[Chrisann 0]

I am fat, not because of overload on Snacks, Cookies and soda. I am fat because I have no willpower.

Sure, grill the chicken, I'll have 5 or 6 pieces. Oh, rice, give me a salad bowl full, oh, now I want more. Ice Cream, who needs a bowl, I can eat out of the container.

It took me 3 days of eating out of an ice cream container to finish a half gallon and eat that instead of dinner. I could eat 3 cups of rice. I could eat on occasion, a can of pringles. But generally, just keep eating more than a regular portion size. Consistently.

Every diet failed for me because I couldn't stand measuring stuff. I didn't like the taste of the packaged foods, Nutrisystem and Weight Watchers for example.

A co-worker buys a whole bagel and only eats half. The other half is wrapped, I would get it. lunch in the kitchen on one of our clients? I would get 2 or 3 sandwiches.

It was there. I saw it, I smelled it, I wanted it.

[taybarrera 0]

I was born fat, I think... I see pics of myself as a baby-- I could hardly walk straight because I was chubby. It continued into my youth.... by 5th grade I weighed 125 lbs and gained 5-10 lbs each year from then. I dislocated my hip at age 13 (during Middle School - a time hen everyone is struggling to fit in, I never could), stayed on crutches for two years after that, and learned to eat my way through sorrow. By age 14 ,my older brother was murdered.... Now at age 30, I'm facing a total hip replacement.... I never thought about all these things until now.... but I guess, I too, have my reasons....

I

[kathystrick 3]

BJean - You didn't sound preachy! You are saying the things I have been thinking and in a way fearing I guess. I have been to my seminar and all I need to do to get the ball rolling is call my insurance and verify coverage, then make my first appointment. But you know what? I am scared to death to do that. :help: I keep finding reason after reason not to. I am so afraid I will once again not have the willpower to succeed, after putting myself through surgery and all that entails, to still look in the mirror and see this fat person. I want to lose the weight, I really do. But how does one go about dealing with the head issues that got you where you are in the first place? Personally, I know a lot of mine is self esteem issues. Growing up being bigger than most of the boys in my class. There was one who even called me "Big Momma" who lived in my neighborhood, so I heard it all the time from him and his friends, who would always laugh it up when he said it. :cry I see him around town sometimes now and I still remember him saying that and wonder if he recognizes me and thinks that name still. Getting the weight off always takes care of the self esteem part of the problem, at least until it starts creeping back on. :faint:I read and read these forums and the success stories are awesome and very motivational, especially the pictures. I just have to decide that the fear of what might happen isn't as strong as my deisre to make it not happen, if that makes any sense. The skinny woman in me is ready to be set free!!!! :clap2:

[katiep2003 0]

I am fat because...

Most of my family is overweight, because I'vehad two babies in 2 years, and in between those babies I was on thebirth control shot that shot my weight up by 60 lbs. And since then nothing has worked to get the weight off. I have stopped eating out, only make baked chicken and baked pork chops with a healthy side dish, and I only give myself the portion I give my 3 year old. I excercise for 30 -60 minutes a day... stairs are a great thing to run up and down. We take a 2 mile walk every night. And in the span of 4 months since we've moved I have lost 5 lbs. And I am tired, I need extra help...

[starryeyed 0]

Several possible reasons why I am fat:

1. Obesity runs very strongly in my mother's side of the family.

2. Two kids 17 months apart.

3. And sadly, an emotionally unfufilling marriage to a husband with flat affect, who never gets excited or happy or shows much enthusiasm about anything.

It's EASY to eat yourself to a happy place and that's what I have been doing. Loneliness can be a great recipe for fat.

4. I like food, no doubt about it.

5. It's easier not to exercise, even though I enjoy doing so.

starryeyed

[mejr62 0]

Growing up being bigger than most of the boys in my class. There was one who even called me "Big Momma" who lived in my neighborhood, so I heard it all the time from him and his friends, who would always laugh it up when he said it. :cry I see him around town sometimes now and I still remember him saying that and wonder if he recognizes me and thinks that name still.

Kathystrick.....

Your post brought tears to my eyes. I can remember being teased about being big in Jr High and High School and it was painful.

At that time I was only about 15 pounds over normal. Kids can be so mean. My first reaction was to come to your home town and go kick that guys butt!!!!!!! I am not a violent person at all although, that was my first thought. We will teach him about Big Momma's!!!!LOL LOL:biggrin1:

Guess I still have some anger over those stupid boys and their comments. I believe that is where I first started having the fat issue...

I became so self conscience and would come home from school and eat my way to feeling better. Suppose I could go on and on.

Just wanted to let you know I could relate and to tell you that you are worth it!!!!! This is the first thing I have done for just me in a very long time. Please let me know how you are doing with progression toward this. Take care of you!!!! :whoo:

[kathystrick 3]

Guess I still have some anger over those stupid boys and their comments. I believe that is where I first started having the fat issue...I became so self conscience and would come home from school and eat my way to feeling better. Suppose I could go on and on.

Just wanted to let you know I could relate and to tell you that you are worth it!!!!! This is the first thing I have done for just me in a very long time. Please let me know how you are doing with progression toward this. Take care of you!!!! :whoo:

Thanks for understanding. I guess we've all been there at one time or another. I just wish we could have realize when we were young how ignorant those boys were before they had such a negative impact on our self esteem. I know mine surely suffered. I shrank a little more everytime he said it. And now, over 20 years later, I am still suffering because of his ignorance.

I have been to my seminar, but that's as far as I've gone. I haven't been able to find a job since moving to Georgia, which I am also blaming at least in part on my size, so we just don't have the money for all of the pre-testing and co-pays and stuff right now. Looks like I am going to have to wait a bit, but I'm not giving up!! Good luck with your surgery and keep me posted on how it goes. I will be thinking about you!!!

Kathy

[BJean 16]

The band is not something that will solve all our problems. It makes very few decisions about food for us. It does some, of course, but most of it is up to us. We still have the same issues after surgery as we did before surgery. What we have to do is figure out a way to care enough about ourselves that we fight our way to reaching a point where we enjoy having healthy bodies and healthy self esteem and being happy, more than we like eating fat-laden, super rich, super foods and being depressed.

I believe that nature is going against us all the time. I believe losing is complicated and keeping it off is a never-ending problem. But I also know that being obese is killing us, killing our self esteem and robbing us of a better way of life.

We can get the band and get a reminder that we're overeating and have a tool to help us find our way. But the work, both mental and physical, is up to us.

We have to enjoy what we can accomplish in our road to success. We have to pat ourselves on the back when no one else has a clue how hard it was for us to not eat a hot fudge sundae, or bag of chips, or our kids' Halloween candy. Each and every time that we do NOT eat something that we know would make us feel good, we have to congratulate ourselves and tell ourselves that we are worth it!!

[insubordination 0]

we fight our way to reaching a point where we enjoy having healthy bodies and healthy self esteem and being happy, more than we like eating fat-laden, super rich, super foods and being depressed.

That choice should be a no-brainer, shouldn't it? The problem for me is that food is so delicious and enjoyable that I have fooled myself into thinking that I'm spoiling myself and being good to myself because it's so delicious and comforting. Some pleasurable things are harmless (massage, bath, laughing, being with loved ones, being in nature). food can be deceptive in that way.

[badmadmama 0]

I'm a SUGAR ADDICT. Portion Control is no problem. Choosing the right foods to eat (fish, etc) is no problem. I can have just a few bites at a meal and I'm satisfied. But put a bag of candy or some Desserts in front of me, and I eat them until they are GONE, no matter how much is there. Ice cream? Whole carton. Candy? Whole bag. God forbid they bring a birthday cake into work - I'm fighting for the corner, and sneaking everyone else's leftover frosting that they thought was "too sweet" to eat.

Eileen

One year out - 240 to 180, but creeping back up!!!