Why are YOU Fat?

DeLarla · February 26, 2005

Mother, sister, cousins, grandmother on father's side - all obese. A couple of our guys struggle with weight, but not one morbidly obese guy in the whole bunch, just women. Every 5-10 years all the cousins get together, and nobody every weighs the same as the last time. You never know who the fat one will be this year, or who the super skinny one will be. This year, my sister is the super skinny one and I'm the one that lost the most, while my cousin who stayed slender all these years is the chunky monkey. A great big familial yo-yo.

Nykee · February 26, 2005

test.......................

Nykee · February 26, 2005

dang it, I made a huge long post and it didnt work..

awww

I gotta go now

BUT I do wanna tell my story

and I wanna tell you all I just found this board and I like it alot and cant wait to be a part of it.

Loves

princess_n_thep · February 26, 2005

Well, I wish I could come up with some reasons. But all that happens when I do it all comes back to me. I eat. And then I eat the wrong foods. And then I eat some more. I am more of a boredum eater. Not because I am hungry but because it is habit. A bad one. Not going to post much more as I already blame myself so much for what I have done to my body over the past years. I am seriously disgusted in my lack of self control.

vinesqueen · February 26, 2005

Why am I fat? 2/25/05<o =""></o>

What a loaded question. I come from a fat family. My mother was/is MO, my father was, both his sisters are, his grandmother was, half of my mother’s aunts were MO… That’s 115 linear years of being fat… Neither one of my brothers is fat, but I think their serious cocaine and meth additions had something to do with that. <o =""></o>

<o =""></o>I love food. I love to cook, to feed people, to nurture them through food. I love to create new recipes, modify old ones. I love to eat good food. And I’ve always been able to eat large quantities of food, I’ve almost always had a difficulty feeling full. Saity is not part of my understanding. Heck, I can’t even spell the word close enough to Word to spell it for me!<o =""> </o>

<o =""></o>Abuse, mental illness, bla bla bla, my mother was a lunatic, and not in a good way. Drugs, booze, pain. All part of the mix. Same as so many others. <o =""></o>

I was always built solidly. Drop me into a pool and I would sink. In high school I always thought I was gi-normous, the scales said I was fat, my family was always telling me how fat I was. But I look at pictures from my year-book, and I was the same size as all the other girls. Bigger than some, smaller than others. <o ="">

</o>When I was small, I was forever getting serious cases of poison oak to the point where my skin looked like it was melting. I would need heavy doses of steroids and I’m sure that caused me to pack on the muscles. When I was 19 I was working out 5 hours a day and I loved every minute of it. My fighting weight was 190, and I thought I was terribly fat. I was a size 11 and I could bench press close to 300 pounds. My warm up was 100 push up (not modified), 100 sit-ups, 100 jumping jacks, and 50 judo push-ups. Then I could get down to my real work out. <o =""></o>

<o =""></o>That lasted a couple of years until I developed asthma. It hit me hard and fast. I was spending a week in the ICU every month for close to a year. Really hard to get any exercise when you get out of breath trying to catch your breath. And then when you add the steroids on top of not being able to move… recipe for disaster. <o =""></o>

<o =""></o>I developed carpal tunnel so bad I had to have four surgeries on my hands. For several years I only had partial use of one hand. (turns out, I can’t do simple arithmetic left handed…) The drug they put me on gave me back nearly full use of both my hands, but I gained 50 pounds in 3 months. Not fun, like so many others here, I decided being fat was the lesser of two evils. <o =""></o>

<o =""></o>I’m concerned that I won’t do well with the band because of the steroids, and the weight I always gain and can never seem lose. I worry that this too will be just another gimmick that I’ve tried. But I know now that the scales lie. They are dammed liars. I don’t have a goal weight, I only have a goal size. <o =""></o>

<o =""></o>“the best fried pickles?” ERk! <o =""> </o>

babsyintx · February 26, 2005

Hi ,

I can think of lots of reasons why I got fat. I was born a preemie and weighed about 4lbs. That was pretty small in the 1960's. I was thin until I was about 10 or so. I was always forced to eat everything on my plate. I came from a very dysfunctional family and I had low self esteem problems because of an abusive mistrustful father. I remember weighing about 120 at age 10/11 and then I remember 160 at age 15 and the last recollection I have of being under 200 was when I was 19. Then I started drinking heavily and of course with hangovers I would have the urge to eat whoppers or chicken wings at 12:00 midnight. I also drank and ate a lot in my 20's.

I remember weighing about 247 at age 23. Then I moved to Holland and my weight stabilized for a while because of smaller portions and less processed foods in Europe. I stayed in the range of 250 - 260 for a while and went to a dietician to see if I could lose some weight with a well balanced diet. This did not work very well. After my first child, I got up to about 300 lbs, stayed there for lots of years. Ballooned up to 327 and went on Atkins and got my weight down to 279 over an 8 month period. Then I got pregnant again in 2002, went back up to 320 and after my baby was born I dropped back down to the 290's. I was nursing my son for a year and did not gain or lose any weight. ONce I stopped, I ballooned up to 334 about 3 days before lapband surgery. THere is some obesity in my family on my fathers side, mostly the women. None really on my mothers side. My mother was anorexic at one point when she was married to my father. She weighed 82 pounds at her lowest and did not go above 100 until she left my father. She is 5 ' 2 " , so she is much shorter than me and my brothers and sisters. My sisters and my brother do not have a weight problem.

I did not try to diet often. I think I made two serious attempts to get the pounds off. I was always so hungry all the time and I loved junk food. I was never a sweets eater, but I loved bread, cheese butter and Pasta.

So I would say in my case, there were a lot of causes for my weight gain.

Babs in TX

334/180

-154

New goal: 170

Alexandra · February 26, 2005

There's definitely a genetic component to my obesity from my mother's side. It popped up in my grandmother and my aunt, but no one else is significantly overweight. (I also share my thyroid dysfunction with the same aunt.) My mother and another aunt and an uncle were slender, but everyone was raised the same way and fed by the same grandmother. To me that's as clear an argument for a genetic component as if the three of us had green eyes while everyone else's are brown.

DeniseG · February 26, 2005

I am so glad someone brought that up. I was an adopted child and I grew up with a family where everyone was small (Short and thin). I was tall and big. When I met my birthmom and sisters, cousins etc. Some were big. All were tall but one. I am built like my birthmom who is stocky. I wouldn't say we are big boned, but, we both have that Norweigan woman look. So I think genetics plays a big part in it vs nurture. I grew up with family members who were on me about it, so you would think I would stay small in weight like them but, I guess it did the opposite. Of course the only good thing about my genes vs theres-------they have no butts lol and my weight is very proportionate (sp) to my body. I am heavy all over. They gain weight in the middle.

I wonder for those of us who were born heavy. (I weighed close to 11 pounds when I was born. ) if our parents may have had diabetes and didn't know it. The parents who were heavy. They say those with type 2 diabetes usually have big babies.

claraluz · February 26, 2005

Babs, I'm glad you mentioned the social component. Anyone see Supersize Me? . It's a movie in which a thin guy, as an experiment eats McDonald's for Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. No snacking. And he limits his exercise. He gained a huge amount of weight in a month and his skin turned grey and his liver got dangerously sick. But the amazing part was that the first time he ate McDonald's, he vomited. But by the end of the month, he was addicted to it.

I think there are many sociological reasons for obesity:The proliferation of fast food restaurants. The way our lives have gotten so busy with both husband and wife working usually (who has time to cook?). The way all of our modern conveniences have eliminated the need for even tiny, tiny bits of exercise (remote controls, elevators, moving sidewalks in airports, etc, etc). The fact that many of our cities are built around the automobile, not walking (there are precious few sidewalks or biketrails in Houston and one side of the city is 50 miles away from the other). Restaurant portion sizes. I could go on and on.

Certainly the sociological factors alone are not responsible for anyone's obesity. But throw in the genetic, psychological, and other factors and I do think they contribute to the overall perfect storm of obesity.

Nancy

ladiebird · February 27, 2005

Hi All

ive tried to think about when i became fat. what was it linked to? what caused it?

well i didnt have a great childhood. had an very abusive relationship with father of my kids (who i dumped years ago) and have a kid with adhd which is very stressful...am i stress eater?

After giving it a lot of thought i have to be honest and say.....

The reason i am fat is because i ate too much and didnt exercise enough.....

cant blame anything other than myself for loving food so much and in big portions....

However even though i am brutally honest about my own obesity i do understand that for many people there is a trigger to their weight gain and this post is in no way meant to upset anyone who have a very real trigger

i just trutfully cant blame anyone for the size of my hips other than myself..

love tracey

BeachBabe(soon) · February 27, 2005

Not a single person in my family is obese. A little heavy, maybe. I wanted love and acceptance. I have 3 older sisters and had an oler brother(o d on drugs). When I was little I would watch my mother kiss, cuddle give I Love You's to my brother and wait for my turn. But It never came. I was never invited to sit on my Mothers lap. Than my opinions became "stupid". I made no sense, "you don't know what your talking about". She made fun of me when I cryed. My brother was also an alcoholic and would put me down and tell me how fat my thighs were.(i was only 120lbs) He would tell me I don't deserve to eat the food in the frige or have the eye glasses on my face. Oh, the joy of family. When I was little, I use to sleep with my mother, you guess it, my father left us to be with his other Family. But would pop in with treats of FOOD. Any way, my Mother would make us, her and I, special bologna sandwiches @ nite. She would cut the crust off, spread the mayo just so, and cut it in perfect little squares. We would sit in bed wacth TV and drink milk and eat. Gee I wonder why I like to snack at night? And think so little of myself. Or why I have a screwed up relationship with men.

Our eating comes from the same place inside us, how do we "fix" or "fill" that place?

DeLarla · March 18, 2005

Bumped for Trop.

Kimber-lilly · March 19, 2005

Wow. Amazing eye opening stories--finally cementing in my head that I am NOT the only one who feels the way I do. A huge relief.

I have always been fat. I can remember as a little girl offers of "rewards" from my grandmother (I was her favorite, inspite of my size)--new clothes, anything if I would just lose some weight. I have a cousin who was/is overweight like me, and I remember that my Grampa took us to a movie one summer night, then to Big Boy's for dessert. I didn't order any, but my cousin did--one of those fab brownie and ice cream concoctions--and I remember wanting one on one hand, but relishing for the rest of the summer, the accolades and praise I got from both Grandparents for "resisting".

I can remember eating an entire loaf of bread with butter by myself that summer, too.

I have been banded since Sept. '04 and truly missed, I mean really GRIEVED over the loss of plowing thru huge quantities of food. I haven't identified specifically WHY I miss that, because I can't identify why I did it to begin with--all I know is that it felt GOOD. Of course, overeating now doesn't feel physically good at all....

I was thin for a short period of time, but abusing alcohol and myself at the same time....bad time for me looking back. It's like I traded the booze and the men for food....My sister doesn't over eat, but is a true blue high functioning alcoholic. My mother is sort of a binge eater. She was a widow with two little girls by the age of 28--she remarried when I was ten and I think most of our evening meals were take out/drive thru or grazing throughout the night. Tough habits to break!

I don't physically feel hungry anymore (much) and often forget to eat because of this...if only I could get a handle on the emotional part of it.....

Emmy27 · March 19, 2005

I am not fat because I am miserable. I am fat because I WAS miserable and developed habits at that point that will take me a lot longer to break than it did to learn them. I had a dysfunctional family to the point where my mother and I had to leave and change our identities and move from place to place. I was thin then but my obsession with food began as we had none... I remember going to a neighbors house and they had rice a roni - it was like a jackpot. But, these days it seems "dysfunctional" families is the norm, unfortunately. So why am *I* fat and not the girl nextdoor who had a similary horid childhood??? I honestly think part of it is genetics, though certainly less than 50% of the issue. The other 50% are the ridiculous habits I formed...

I snack - especially at night. My kids go to bed and I head for the fridge/cabinets and then to the couch where I remain there until I go to bed (or, subsitute couch for computer). I guess this can be attributed to "hording" - I had to hord food as a child in order to have some the next day. I used to hide packs of pudding powder and eat it in the bathroom.

I never feel full unless I gorge myself - think Thankgiving dinner. If I don't feel like I am going to bust then I don't feel satisfied. Not sure why this is...

I eat so fast I don't "hear" my body saying it had enough... or that I had something that will make me sick, until it's too late. Again, goes back to the having to hurry it up so no one would see what I was able to sneak or just because we were always going somewhere.

Preband, as an adultm eating is like autopilot (as I mentioned in another post). Almost like I don't even realize I am doing it.

The band is helping - feel full sooner than gorging myself... still snacking but less often and it's a decision I make vs. an automatic behavior.

There is obviously more to all this but if I keep writing I may as well write a book, lol.

I am on the road to recovery.... changing the way I look at food is my biggest challenge - it's for nurishment and nothing else. Changing how fast I eat is the other. My portions are much better, my food choices are where they should be....

Anyway... thanks for posting this - great to read others stories and think about my own.