Is not just an Iron Maiden song, lol. ?

• 27 yrs of marriage, now closing in on 5 years as a widower
• finding my way in facing the ever-present painful loss, yet continuing forward
• 9 yrs post op from gastric sleeve
• emerging from isolation and stepping out from the cave into the world around me
• interested in living again...enthused about it, in fact.
• interested in meeting people and possibly dating.

Things have changed over the last few years.

For example, Facebook. When I was mildly active on there before my wife became terminally ill it was more or less updates from friends on the goings on in their lives.

Fast forward to a couple months ago when I reactivated my account I quickly discovered things were way, way different. Bombarded with fakery and insidious marketing schemes.

I guess being naive (aka FB ignorant) had a quick learning curve. For example, I had an inbound messenger from a recently added "friend". She'd invited me out for a meet. We met the next day at a coffee shop. I almost didn't recognize her when she arrived. She walked over and introduced herself. Her profile pictures only vaguely resembled her. I am quick to joke about stuff, but resisted the impulse. Otherwise I'd have asked if she was involved with a witness protection program.

It was difficult to get comfortable with someone whose first move was a disguise. Now, perhaps there are legitimate safety reasons why she would take such precautions. I can understand the concerns. The next half hour was a conversation that revealed a number of incompatible views on things.

Mentioned the meet to a buddy. He laughed and told me that FB is, in fact, a minefield.

Working long hours and rotating shifts doesn't lend itself well to dating. I suppose it will be an obstacle that I'll figure out.

Certainly expanding my in person outings beyond just work & the shooting ranges.

Who knew that the supermarket was a place to meet and chat ? Not me.

Who knew that swapping over from a barber shop to a different place for haircuts would also be a meet & greet spot ?

How about a doctors office visit for annual physical....new nurses...another coffee shop invite.

Or another unexpected introduction & follow up....when buying cologne...for the first time in forever....

I guess the best way for me is to simply live life.....show up in person for any shopping needs vs no more online shopping.

Get out there in the daily grind and simply be real.

Anyway.....open for suggestions from folks who have been there and found success.

Good morning from New Mexico! I went through regain also. I started at about 340, down to 175 and now at about 210. Instead of feeling down on myself for that, I need to celebrate the "triggers for celebration". I LOVE that phrase! Thank you so much for your positive energy. It can be a lonely road. Hoping this forum will be a place where I can share the positivity.

You're an inspiration! Say hello sometimes

Best.

Angie