Is not just an Iron Maiden song, lol. ?

• 27 yrs of marriage, now closing in on 5 years as a widower
• finding my way in facing the ever-present painful loss, yet continuing forward
• 9 yrs post op from gastric sleeve
• emerging from isolation and stepping out from the cave into the world around me
• interested in living again...enthused about it, in fact.
• interested in meeting people and possibly dating.

Things have changed over the last few years.

For example, Facebook. When I was mildly active on there before my wife became terminally ill it was more or less updates from friends on the goings on in their lives.

Fast forward to a couple months ago when I reactivated my account I quickly discovered things were way, way different. Bombarded with fakery and insidious marketing schemes.

I guess being naive (aka FB ignorant) had a quick learning curve. For example, I had an inbound messenger from a recently added "friend". She'd invited me out for a meet. We met the next day at a coffee shop. I almost didn't recognize her when she arrived. She walked over and introduced herself. Her profile pictures only vaguely resembled her. I am quick to joke about stuff, but resisted the impulse. Otherwise I'd have asked if she was involved with a witness protection program.

It was difficult to get comfortable with someone whose first move was a disguise. Now, perhaps there are legitimate safety reasons why she would take such precautions. I can understand the concerns. The next half hour was a conversation that revealed a number of incompatible views on things.

Mentioned the meet to a buddy. He laughed and told me that FB is, in fact, a minefield.

Working long hours and rotating shifts doesn't lend itself well to dating. I suppose it will be an obstacle that I'll figure out.

Certainly expanding my in person outings beyond just work & the shooting ranges.

Who knew that the supermarket was a place to meet and chat ? Not me.

Who knew that swapping over from a barber shop to a different place for haircuts would also be a meet & greet spot ?

How about a doctors office visit for annual physical....new nurses...another coffee shop invite.

Or another unexpected introduction & follow up....when buying cologne...for the first time in forever....

I guess the best way for me is to simply live life.....show up in person for any shopping needs vs no more online shopping.

Get out there in the daily grind and simply be real.

Anyway.....open for suggestions from folks who have been there and found success.

I don't think I have a whole lot to add @Dub, other than to say good luck in your search!

Actually, I guess I will throw out one thing?

Keep in mind I've been married 36 years, so anything I say may not apply in this day and age, but I was told by a wise man many years ago to seek a partner that has similar interests. He said the best way to do that is in social settings where people are pursuing those interests. Whether it's church, a bowling league, your local gym, or a book club, your shared interests help build bonds. Especially if an active lifestyle is important to you, things like your local running club can be great places to meet people. I mention running clubs specifically because they have a bit of a rep for actually being quasi dating clubs.

Thanks.

I'm open to any and all advice.

I'd likely die on the vine with the book club theme.....wonder if there are any women into Jack Carr novels, lol ???

My home away from home used to be the shooting ranges. There are a growing number of ladies shooting now. This is an awesome trend. Perhaps it'll be a future afternoon date venue .Regardless, it'll remain a place I visit weekly.

You are definitely onto something with pursuing the shared interest aspects. I will look for ways to do that. There is a local kayak group that a buddy told me about. He made a point to stress the number of women he sees when he's attended.

The gym has been a great place to meet women. Nurses, especially. I try not to let the fact they are bringing the heart shock pads over to me get in the way of good conversation. Just kidding. I haven't stroked out, yet. I simply go in and do my thing....mind my own bidness. I did have one hop on the treadmill beside mine, in a sea of open treadmills. I smiled, nodded and kept doing my thing. She laughed and began chatting...I was stunned,"Dude, ya still go it"....only to realize she was on a cellphone call coming through her earbuds.

No worries, no hurry. Everything has a way of sorting out.

Yea, honestly a lot of people just want to get in and out of the gym and not be bothered. One thing you might try though would be group fitness classes at the gym. As a general rule, people are a bit more open to talking to others in these classes and as a bonus, they tend to be dominated by women.

Yoga might be another option since most yoga classes are like 90% or more women. Just be aware, there may be a higher percentage in yoga classes that are vegan or otherwise won't be happy with your penchant to hunt.

4 hours ago, SpartanMaker said:

Yea, honestly a lot of people just want to get in and out of the gym and not be bothered. One thing you might try though would be group fitness classes at the gym. As a general rule, people are a bit more open to talking to others in these classes and as a bonus, they tend to be dominated by women.

Yoga might be another option since most yoga classes are like 90% or more women. Just be aware, there may be a higher percentage in yoga classes that are vegan or otherwise won't be happy with your penchant to hunt.

Man...you just had me laughing.

I did recently dodge an invite to a yoga class. She asked and all I could envision was my big arse busting a move on the yoga mat......and getting stuck. That first date could'e ended with me in traction.

I was able to redirect it to meet up for something less likely to have me be a total goof. Went well. I don't know how many yoga dodges I'll get, though. My ace card will be to ask her for some 1:1 private instruction first....to prevent embarrassing her in front of her class....although I think her point was to get me there and laugh her arse off as I contorted my way through it. Hell, I'd likely tap out during the warm up. And if they bring out goats....Im outa there. GONE.

Bachelor life. Whew....it is different

Goat yoga, now there's something high on my list to try... Not!

I'm thinking there's a blog in your future titled Dub's Dating Adventures. I'd read it for sure!

12 hours ago, SpartanMaker said:

Goat yoga, now there's something high on my list to try... Not!

I'm thinking there's a blog in your future titled Dub's Dating Adventures. I'd read it for sure!

I may use that title.

After all, OPERATION MIDNIGHT HAMMER was sorta taken.

You would be surprised, women like men who make errors or embarrass themselves, it makes them "vulnerable" and more lovable, adorable and fun to be around. If you can laugh with your friend, that friendship can easily develop into something more. I married my goof-ball husband who has two left feet that he freely admits, and we laugh more than anything else. Of course, I too have messed up a few times, on purpose and unintentionally and it made a lasting impact on our relationship. Been married 28 years this year.

59 minutes ago, WendyJane said:

You would be surprised, women like men who make errors or embarrass themselves, it makes them "vulnerable" and more lovable, adorable and fun to be around. If you can laugh with your friend, that friendship can easily develop into something more. I married my goof-ball husband who has two left feet that he freely admits, and we laugh more than anything else. Of course, I too have messed up a few times, on purpose and unintentionally and it made a lasting impact on our relationship. Been married 28 years this year.

Thank you.....and congrats on 28 years of marriage.

As far as the venues.....I find it highly ironic that these women independently picked two things that I hate. My no-wanna-do list is fairly short...and they nailed the a couple top 5's....right from the start. Irony or mind readers.

Thanks for the congrats.

So tell me what are those "no-wanna-do" things on your list?

Most women are not mind readers, lots tend to mold into what they think the man wants them to be, unless you find a solid woman that holds her own and is independent. My 28 years of marriage comes from being frankly honest, apologize later if necessary or start a conversation with "this might come out wrong, but..." Having open and honest conversation is the key to success in a marriage. Many women just want a wedding and don't think about the marriage. It takes work just like our new lives with surgery takes work. So be careful of those sneaky women just looking for a great way to have a huge party (the wedding).

21 minutes ago, WendyJane said:

Thanks for the congrats.

So tell me what are those "no-wanna-do" things on your list?

Most women are not mind readers, lots tend to mold into what they think the man wants them to be, unless you find a solid woman that holds her own and is independent. My 28 years of marriage comes from being frankly honest, apologize later if necessary or start a conversation with "this might come out wrong, but..." Having open and honest conversation is the key to success in a marriage. Many women just want a wedding and don't think about the marriage. It takes work just like our new lives with surgery takes work. So be careful of those sneaky women just looking for a great way to have a huge party (the wedding).

Lemme see here....what order to roll with....I'll start with the No-Can-Do List. Gonna sound cornball...but then again....cornball is my wheelhouse, lol.

Okay...here is the Top 5 that come to mind over my morning coffee:

• skydiving. hell to the NO. Added to that anything that involves heights. It wouldn't be cool for them to see me pass out from terror......although I did have a great conversation with a gal yesterday afternoon who has professional live saving medical skillz. So....she could probably take me to death's door....and bring me back. But no planes, roller coasters, wall climbing or the like. Wind tunnel is about the best I can consider.... Years ago she took me out for margaritas...took my arse out. We found solace as two souls in marriages that were struggling,
• no sharks. I grew up near the coast...snorkeling and scuba diving frequently.... continued it through college. At some point in my mid-20's I began to have sinus troubles equalizing the pressure when diving...made for painful surface intervals between dives. My Uncle had been through the same a few years prior. He tried surgical remedy....but it didn't help. My late wife, her brother, his wife and some other friends all took their diving certification stuff....and then for various reasons,...each of them dropped out of the class. I'd resigned myself to give the sinus surgery a chance....surgeon was also a diver and he felt like success was most probable. During my years diving I've been close....crazy close....to sharks a plenty. It was all good as I was most often near rocks, reefs, shipwreck structure, etc. Cover was close, if needed. The exposure and sketchy periods were when getting to the bottom & when resurfacing....there I sometimes felt like bait on a hook. Since then I have had some close calls when I was simply swimming on a beach day.....going for a swim to cool off from the sun. One time I had my early teenage son with us....We saw a sand bar a couple hundred yards off shore.,...there were surfers out there. He was deadset on making it out there. I finally caved in and told him we could go but he had to listen to me...currents and such. He agreed and out we went....all was well until it wasn't. I found out the scary way that baitfish were schooling in spots between the sand bar and the shallows. We were swimming amidst the schooling baitfish....joining them on the freakin menu. I saw one, two then three sets of dorsal fins surface in between waves. Then one came too close....got my son's attention and lied to him....told him to get in close with me and we were headed back to shore because I was cramping. He was pissed, but he did what he was told and then gave me a dose of ribbing later on...."Dad you wanna hand me a drink.....oh no...don't do it....you'll cramp up", "Dad....you want me to take the cooler back to the car....don't want you cramping up", etc.
  • My favorite kind of vacation is to sandy places. Don't want to become baitfish again, though....ever. Never thought it would be an issue until recent weeks. Met a gal who is a diver....kept my shark aversions quiet, lol
• No yoga....period. Could be the greatest thing ever.....but I'm sidestepping. Same could be said of other types of group excursive. I'm a no-class sorta dude. Not going to line up and get into some torture. I prefer to do my torture in solo....lick my wounds and gain the benefits results. I have to protect my shout out knees and right shoulder and keep pre-habbing them until I can get schedules aligned to have joint replacements done. My geriatric-bariatric sorta gym stuff would likely have younger womenz laughing their butts off. So yeah....the gym is where I need to go it alone....for now, at least.
• Nothing illegal...or at least keep it mostly legal. I'm not robbing banks...but if she asked really nicely and had a killer smile....I may be her getaway driver and lookout.
• Snakes are off limits. So if they are into snakes as pets.....it is gonna take a HEAP of Dr. Phil-esqe counseling to make that something I can ease up on. My time in the woods has me averse to snakes. The part of Georgia where I live has many varieties of rattlesnakes, copperheads, moccasins, etc, etc. I've had some sketchy moments with 'em all and I went to guns every time. Probably wouldn't go over well with a date who had pet snakes.

.........................................

Note that karaoke is now off the list. I'm averse to it. Averse as all hell......but developments yesterday have me sliding that one off my radar.

I met someone who sings. I mean, sings at a high level, in formal events, etc. When the subject came up in conversation I was coy....thinking, "here we go with the freakin karaoke silliness"....but I kept my mouth zipped as she was discussing things she enjoyed....music...making music via singing wasn't a hobby....but a passion. My coy arse ...when asked about likes...simply said something cornball regarding singing. "Well...it is highly ironic that we have met...you being a singer, and all." Winked and nodded...knowingly (even though I no nothingsss...strong is my ignorance). She bit and wanted to know more. I deflected and said something about having a small bit of singing experience.....at a professional level....but didn't want to bore her with details....wanted to find out more about her.

So it went for a few minutes until she went back to my singing and pressed the matter. "Well, young lady....here is the cosmic irony on this matter....you are clearly impassioned & talented with your voice.....so very odd that we would meet.....you see...you are now looking at the WORST singer on the face of the Earth.....or at least in this county.....I suck.....I've even been paid to NOT sing....had dollar bills tossed at me to put the mic down.....so there it is....I am in awe of your courage to stand up and rock your voice......I am in awe and I'm hardcore untrainable in that area".

She laughed and took it all in stride. "So what can you be trained to do....." Mr Cornball here replied with something dumb like, "For starters, I am housebroken...errr mostly housebroken. I can bark...or not bark...roll over, shake and play dead, fetch....you know, stuff like that". She laughed again...but not laughing in the way of "somebody come save me from this nerd....somebody, anybody". Humored laughing....dare I hope, acceptance laughter....is that even a thing ?

When I say we laughed....I mean throughout the afternoon and eventing we laughed. Either this gal is challenged or she was actually amused at my dipshyt self. I was intrigued of everything she volunteered about her life, likes, loves, views.

@GreenTealael had recently stated major bigtime advice that was THE SURE 'NUFF TRUTH. it pertained to core values being integral to compatibility. Not realizing it was occurring, this lady and I spent hours yesterday covering so much ground that it was unreal. By dawns light this morning I am still shaking my head in amazement. Without me realizing it had occurred....we'd checked off a pile core belief simpaticoisms....yep that is now a word. Simpatico-isms.

I was open and honest and simply went with it. Each topic was a new discovery of our views and feels about stuff.

Been down this road a good bit lately....and there were always stumbling issues or categories where divergent views may be a red flag. I'm not talking about politics or stuff like that. I couldn't give a rip about that. I appreciate different viewpoints. I mean the bigger issues...

Here are some of the hurdles or outright roadblocks that I've had recently in this bachelor living...and this is with even short term fun:

• No married women. As tempting as a couple have made it...No-Can-Do. I am NOT about to go there. DO NO HARM is the hill I will die on....regardless of the temptation.
• No coworkers...or at least within my work "zone". There is an engineer and another administrator in another "zone" where some interesting recent conversations have occurred. Even then, I waded much more cautiously than other situations.
• My sobriety will not be compromised. Long story...shortened version: haven't had a drop since February 2019. Quit for practical reasons to be a responsible caregiver 24/7. Considered myself a casual drinker...social drinker.....but in the years since I saw where I'd used alcohol as a crutch...a tool...a mechanism to distance myself from work stress....or marital stress... I later acknowledged it was a simply delaying those stress & ultimately combining them. So, after my wife passed in 2021...I maintained the sobriety...realizing it was in my best interest. Since then I have benefited hugely from it. I can go out with a girl and am A-Okay with her having a drink or three....I'll have my coffee, water and am just fine. I won't open a bottle or pop a top again, though.
• Matters of the soul. Didn't seem like this would be an issue for initial attraction and such. But I found that even in casual contact it can and does surface and diametrically opposing views are a non-starter....even if physical attraction is main the component the main draw.

Back to yesterday's first meet with lil' Miss Singer....it--was--wonderful. Wunnerfull....I didn't want to be pushy,....or forward....but....wow.

So refreshing,

I was thirsty for more....and it was shared, clearly. She even stated such....boldly. Stepped up and put it out there....interest demonstrated. She made the first commit.

I had been keeping my desires reserved...she was... different. I was having different feels and did not want to rush into anything. This was someone that, yes, major physical attraction is there...but all my no-can-do stuff were non-issues...taken in stride....acceptance. She probably has guys hitting on her all the time and I didn't want to be another schuck trying to come on to her. I mean...I DID want to...but there seemed to be "more than that" taking shape. Everything was.....different. Yeah, I know I said that already...having difficulty finding correct verbiage to accurately describe.

Your ever had the thought that you'd love to go back in time and slap the cowboy shyt outa your past self..and do so at a most specific moment and change the outcome and improve the trajectory of past self ????

Yesterday at some point after an hour or so...it was almost as if I felt a hand on my shoulder....a warning hand...it was telling me to slow the roll...be real....look at the bigger picture....and boy howdy, there is a strong hint there is possibly healthy structure for a bigger picture. The hand on the shoulder clenched down more than once....the physical desires needed to be reminded of the cosmic slap that was needed. Dumb as it may sound.....and for whatever reason I can be grateful for....I was calm and didn't blow it....wasn't "that dude". It was rewarded with hours more talking, laughing, disclosing, supporting, etc, etc.

---------------------------

So.... we have an actual, real deal, no kiddin' super official date next week...Wednesday. We had to plot through our work schedules to figure it out...but it is set. A date. Not a hook up.

1 hour ago, Dub said:

Lemme see here....what order to roll with....I'll start with the No-Can-Do List. Gonna sound cornball...but then again....cornball is my wheelhouse, lol.

Okay...here is the Top 5 that come to mind over my morning coffee:

• skydiving. hell to the NO. Added to that anything that involves heights. It wouldn't be cool for them to see me pass out from terror......although I did have a great conversation with a gal yesterday afternoon who has professional live saving medical skillz. So....she could probably take me to death's door....and bring me back. But no planes, roller coasters, wall climbing or the like. Wind tunnel is about the best I can consider.... Years ago she took me out for margaritas...took my arse out. We found solace as two souls in marriages that were struggling,
• no sharks. I grew up near the coast...snorkeling and scuba diving frequently.... continued it through college. At some point in my mid-20's I began to have sinus troubles equalizing the pressure when diving...made for painful surface intervals between dives. My Uncle had been through the same a few years prior. He tried surgical remedy....but it didn't help. My late wife, her brother, his wife and some other friends all took their diving certification stuff....and then for various reasons,...each of them dropped out of the class. I'd resigned myself to give the sinus surgery a chance....surgeon was also a diver and he felt like success was most probable. During my years diving I've been close....crazy close....to sharks a plenty. It was all good as I was most often near rocks, reefs, shipwreck structure, etc. Cover was close, if needed. The exposure and sketchy periods were when getting to the bottom & when resurfacing....there I sometimes felt like bait on a hook. Since then I have had some close calls when I was simply swimming on a beach day.....going for a swim to cool off from the sun. One time I had my early teenage son with us....We saw a sand bar a couple hundred yards off shore.,...there were surfers out there. He was deadset on making it out there. I finally caved in and told him we could go but he had to listen to me...currents and such. He agreed and out we went....all was well until it wasn't. I found out the scary way that baitfish were schooling in spots between the sand bar and the shallows. We were swimming amidst the schooling baitfish....joining them on the freakin menu. I saw one, two then three sets of dorsal fins surface in between waves. Then one came too close....got my son's attention and lied to him....told him to get in close with me and we were headed back to shore because I was cramping. He was pissed, but he did what he was told and then gave me a dose of ribbing later on...."Dad you wanna hand me a drink.....oh no...don't do it....you'll cramp up", "Dad....you want me to take the cooler back to the car....don't want you cramping up", etc.
  • My favorite kind of vacation is to sandy places. Don't want to become baitfish again, though....ever. Never thought it would be an issue until recent weeks. Met a gal who is a diver....kept my shark aversions quiet, lol
• No yoga....period. Could be the greatest thing ever.....but I'm sidestepping. Same could be said of other types of group excursive. I'm a no-class sorta dude. Not going to line up and get into some torture. I prefer to do my torture in solo....lick my wounds and gain the benefits results. I have to protect my shout out knees and right shoulder and keep pre-habbing them until I can get schedules aligned to have joint replacements done. My geriatric-bariatric sorta gym stuff would likely have younger womenz laughing their butts off. So yeah....the gym is where I need to go it alone....for now, at least.
• Nothing illegal...or at least keep it mostly legal. I'm not robbing banks...but if she asked really nicely and had a killer smile....I may be her getaway driver and lookout.
• Snakes are off limits. So if they are into snakes as pets.....it is gonna take a HEAP of Dr. Phil-esqe counseling to make that something I can ease up on. My time in the woods has me averse to snakes. The part of Georgia where I live has many varieties of rattlesnakes, copperheads, moccasins, etc, etc. I've had some sketchy moments with 'em all and I went to guns every time. Probably wouldn't go over well with a date who had pet snakes.

.........................................

Note that karaoke is now off the list. I'm averse to it. Averse as all hell......but developments yesterday have me sliding that one off my radar.

I met someone who sings. I mean, sings at a high level, in formal events, etc. When the subject came up in conversation I was coy....thinking, "here we go with the freakin karaoke silliness"....but I kept my mouth zipped as she was discussing things she enjoyed....music...making music via singing wasn't a hobby....but a passion. My coy arse ...when asked about likes...simply said something cornball regarding singing. "Well...it is highly ironic that we have met...you being a singer, and all." Winked and nodded...knowingly (even though I no nothingsss...strong is my ignorance). She bit and wanted to know more. I deflected and said something about having a small bit of singing experience.....at a professional level....but didn't want to bore her with details....wanted to find out more about her.

So it went for a few minutes until she went back to my singing and pressed the matter. "Well, young lady....here is the cosmic irony on this matter....you are clearly impassioned & talented with your voice.....so very odd that we would meet.....you see...you are now looking at the WORST singer on the face of the Earth.....or at least in this county.....I suck.....I've even been paid to NOT sing....had dollar bills tossed at me to put the mic down.....so there it is....I am in awe of your courage to stand up and rock your voice......I am in awe and I'm hardcore untrainable in that area".

She laughed and took it all in stride. "So what can you be trained to do....." Mr Cornball here replied with something dumb like, "For starters, I am housebroken...errr mostly housebroken. I can bark...or not bark...roll over, shake and play dead, fetch....you know, stuff like that". She laughed again...but not laughing in the way of "somebody come save me from this nerd....somebody, anybody". Humored laughing....dare I hope, acceptance laughter....is that even a thing ?

When I say we laughed....I mean throughout the afternoon and eventing we laughed. Either this gal is challenged or she was actually amused at my dipshyt self. I was intrigued of everything she volunteered about her life, likes, loves, views.

@GreenTealael had recently stated major bigtime advice that was THE SURE 'NUFF TRUTH. it pertained to core values being integral to compatibility. Not realizing it was occurring, this lady and I spent hours yesterday covering so much ground that it was unreal. By dawns light this morning I am still shaking my head in amazement. Without me realizing it had occurred....we'd checked off a pile core belief simpaticoisms....yep that is now a word. Simpatico-isms.

I was open and honest and simply went with it. Each topic was a new discovery of our views and feels about stuff.

Been down this road a good bit lately....and there were always stumbling issues or categories where divergent views may be a red flag. I'm not talking about politics or stuff like that. I couldn't give a rip about that. I appreciate different viewpoints. I mean the bigger issues...

Here are some of the hurdles or outright roadblocks that I've had recently in this bachelor living...and this is with even short term fun:

• No married women. As tempting as a couple have made it...No-Can-Do. I am NOT about to go there. DO NO HARM is the hill I will die on....regardless of the temptation.
• No coworkers...or at least within my work "zone". There is an engineer and another administrator in another "zone" where some interesting recent conversations have occurred. Even then, I waded much more cautiously than other situations.
• My sobriety will not be compromised. Long story...shortened version: haven't had a drop since February 2019. Quit for practical reasons to be a responsible caregiver 24/7. Considered myself a casual drinker...social drinker.....but in the years since I saw where I'd used alcohol as a crutch...a tool...a mechanism to distance myself from work stress....or marital stress... I later acknowledged it was a simply delaying those stress & ultimately combining them. So, after my wife passed in 2021...I maintained the sobriety...realizing it was in my best interest. Since then I have benefited hugely from it. I can go out with a girl and am A-Okay with her having a drink or three....I'll have my coffee, Water and am just fine. I won't open a bottle or pop a top again, though.
• Matters of the soul. Didn't seem like this would be an issue for initial attraction and such. But I found that even in casual contact it can and does surface and diametrically opposing views are a non-starter....even if physical attraction is main the component the main draw.

Back to yesterday's first meet with lil' Miss Singer....it--was--wonderful. Wunnerfull....I didn't want to be pushy,....or forward....but....wow.

So refreshing,

I was thirsty for more....and it was shared, clearly. She even stated such....boldly. Stepped up and put it out there....interest demonstrated. She made the first commit.

I had been keeping my desires reserved...she was... different. I was having different feels and did not want to rush into anything. This was someone that, yes, major physical attraction is there...but all my no-can-do stuff were non-issues...taken in stride....acceptance. She probably has guys hitting on her all the time and I didn't want to be another schuck trying to come on to her. I mean...I DID want to...but there seemed to be "more than that" taking shape. Everything was.....different. Yeah, I know I said that already...having difficulty finding correct verbiage to accurately describe.

Your ever had the thought that you'd love to go back in time and slap the cowboy shyt outa your past self..and do so at a most specific moment and change the outcome and improve the trajectory of past self ????

Yesterday at some point after an hour or so...it was almost as if I felt a hand on my shoulder....a warning hand...it was telling me to slow the roll...be real....look at the bigger picture....and boy howdy, there is a strong hint there is possibly healthy structure for a bigger picture. The hand on the shoulder clenched down more than once....the physical desires needed to be reminded of the cosmic slap that was needed. Dumb as it may sound.....and for whatever reason I can be grateful for....I was calm and didn't blow it....wasn't "that dude". It was rewarded with hours more talking, laughing, disclosing, supporting, etc, etc.

---------------------------

So.... we have an actual, real deal, no kiddin' super official date next week...Wednesday. We had to plot through our work schedules to figure it out...but it is set. A date. Not a hook up.

Congrats!

What an inspiration! You look incredible. Congrats and hi. I'm new.

On 6/25/2025 at 12:49 AM, Dub said:

And if they bring out goats

If the TV is current then its alpacas these days. Run though, they spit

Good hunting.

1 hour ago, summerseeker said:

If the TV is current then its alpacas these days. Run though, they spit

Good hunting.

Thanks for the insight.

Not interested in spitters.

As far as hunting goes.....very pleased with some recent developments.

Honored, actually.

14 hours ago, AngieNM said:

Congrats and hi. I'm new.

Welcome aboard.

I hope your journey is filled with success and that you acknowledge and reward yourself along the way.

We all tend to be goal oriented around here.

Goals sometimes equate to "finish lines".

I sorta did. I had the surgery, hit my goal and went buck wild. During various life events that followed I went through some regain. Burning that crap off now.

Instead of a goal, I have waypoints that I'm using as triggers for celebration.

example....a certain number of pounds/inches equates to a small expenditure for some new clothes.

Further waypoints reached will trigger additional,

My goal this time is to get to my body's natural lean state and maintain that for the rest of my life.