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What was your "this is it" moment



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Hello everyone! First time post here ☺️ glad I found this site.

Anyway, what was the moment you decided to go through with the surgery? I feel like since the beginning I've been on the fence. My doctors (cardio, pulmonary, primary) all believe that surgery is the right choice for me, but the impression I have is that they want me to get the surgery as a preventative. I've gotten so big that right now I'm lucky I have nothing going on. In fact, my cardiologist said she doesn't usually push surgery but that I'd be the perfect candidate because I'm young and healthy without any issues.

I'm 26, 4'10 and 240 pounds. I started Saxenda on January 18 and since then teeter between being 25 and 27 pounds down, at my highest weight I was 266 That's the most weight I've ever been able to lose, the bariatric surgeon thinks I'll get down to 125-130 (which is scary on its own lol) Saxenda is meant to be a long term medicine which scares me because if I were to get pregnant for example, I would have to stop it and it seems like the weight almost always comes back, I'd also love to avoid a daily injection for the rest of the foreseeable future. With that said I know very well that the surgery is a lifelong change which I believe I'm ready for, I'm just not sure if I'm at the point where it's the BEST option. I guess I don't know how to decide if THIS is when I stop trying to do it all alone and admit I need more help.

I've seen so many people say they wish they had done the surgery sooner but I also see the horror stories and while logically I know success rate is very high and bad reviews are typically the loudest I can't help but feel torn.

If you stick around and read through my novel, I appreciate you!

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I decided to look into the surgery after one day going to my local mall and i could not walk across it from one end to the other without being completely exhausted and needing to take a break. Also friends ask me out and i have no nice clothes to go out in because finding anything in my size is nearly impossible at any retail store i go to.

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Posted (edited)

Hi there, Jamaro. I understand the back and forth issue. I struggled with getting surgery for several years before I finally got it. I was actually ready to pursue it a couple of years prior to getting it, but my primary said I wasn't psychologically ready. She wanted me to continue working with my therapist on my eating issues. I'm still doing that after the surgery as well. My doctor put me on Victoza for blood sugar (now normal and no longer on Victoza) and said it could also help me lose. But, what finally told me "this is it" was one day when I went to a casino with my family. I was walking around and couldn't keep up with them. I was also the youngest in the group. I felt like I had a small child hanging around my torso and got so out of breath. At the time, I was taking prerequisites for nursing school, and knew that there was absolutely no way I could ever be the nurse I wanted to be with that physical condition.

That was my moment. I made an appointment with my primary and told her I just didn't know what to do anymore. However, she surprised me when she said that she had seen my improvement with my eating disorder (binge-eating/purging), that she was recommending me surgery. I was ecstatic!! I immediately went home and started calling surgeons she recommended. Fast forward to now, I am currently in nursing school now (was floored when I got accepted), and I am feeling great on the hospital floor during clinicals. I'm also off most of my medication that I was taking due to my weight-related health issues. It was worth it for me, but I also knew I was ready for it. It's a big change, but so worth it when you're ready.

I wish you luck as you examine this journey for your own life. 😊

Edited by River Moon
Edited for clarification

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Woke up one morning & decided enough & rang my GP for an appointment & referral. Had my surgery about 6 weeks later. Had been bouncing between 60 & 75kg all my adult like. Then menopause & I was 91 almost overnight. Tried to lose it for 3 years but couldn’t lose a pound. A friend had the surgery about 12 months earlier & was very happy so …

I didn’t have any health issues except from aching feet from the rapid gain & then just some burning feet after (no more heels for me) but I knew it was in my future.

You will have to make permanent changes to your eating habits if you want to have permanent success. But that is the same whatever means you use to lose weight - diet, medication, exercise. They are just tools like the surgery. The horror stories aren’t that common really. People write about them because they are seeking support & advice because they are uncommon. But all surgery has risks as do medications. Consider other weight loss drugs that were approved & then taken off the market because of adverse side effects that were discovered over time. If you’re worried, have a long honest chat with your surgeon about risks & the stats behind them. If you are relatively healthy now you are in a better place to have the surgery now than later when you may be experiencing some health issues.

All the best whichever path you choose.

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I tried (REALLY tried) to lose my weight the analogue way through calorie counting and running. I was doing really well. I lost 25kg, and was fitter than I'd been in decades, my labs were brilliant, my GP was incredibly happy with my progress. Then the pandemic hit and I put some weight back on, and while for a while I was stable and managed to keep it in check, I still fell off the wagon. I gained all the weight back plus extra - that tired old familiar routine. I was devastated, and knew I was self-sabotaging, but couldn't get back into the calorie counting and fitness.

That was my "I just cannot do this on my own" moment. I would always do well, get to a certain point, then just... let go and fall back into failure. I knew weight loss surgery was my final option, and after my best effort failed, I took out Private Health Cover, and set my WLS in motion.

I 100% wish I'd done this ten years ago. Good luck with your journey!

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I believe you know when its your time to do the surgery. For me it was surgery or I spend 2 years miserable, loosing 70 pounds again, then taking 5 years to slowly fail to keep it off and end up weighing more. I just couldn't do it again. I was so disabled by my weight its almost impossible to loose any. I took the chance and am so pleased I did. I can do so much now. I am getting my independence back, its exhilarating. My future is what ever I want it to be.

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I decided after a trip when I felt too big for the airline seat and was breathless walking through the terminal.

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Posted (edited)

I decided after being embarrassed by the 100+lbs I had gained after going to a 4th of July party last year. Everyone knew how great I looked when I lost all my weight before (maintained 180lb weight loss for 16 years) and now I had to deal with them looking at me and not recognizing me because I had gotten so large.

That was also the first time I took an edible (medical marijuana gummy) in about a year and a half (I had been pregnant and lost my babe at 25wks). It was also the first time I ran in a long time - I ran just like a sprint in the back yard and it felt good, I was remembering what that felt like.

It was that car ride while leaving the party that I said this, I'm done being fat.

This year will be different.

Edited by LilaNicole20

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Posted (edited)

As someone who cancelled/postponed their surgery TWICE, i get where you are coming from.

And like many of those who came before AND after me, my sole regret of the whole thing was not doing it sooner (or even not doing it right away the first time i was approved).

What caused me to finally go through with my THIRD scheduled date seems a little inconsequential: i was sitting on a patio stair step trying to put sunscreen on my feet at a pool party, but my bulk prevented me from just bending over to do it comfortably, so i had to bend my leg behind me so i could reach. I looked up and noticed people watching me (with what i took as pity, though it may not even have been, it was just what i took it as), and that was it. I was sleeved the next month.

Best decision ever. And while i could have had it done 2 years earlier, better late than never i guess.

You are ready when you’re ready.

Good Luck! ❤️

P.S. We sort of have similar starting stats: I am 5’2”, and was 235 lbs at the beginning of my 2 wk pre-op diet (but im much older…was 46 when i had surgery)

And here are my progress pics:

Edited by ms.sss

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I had surgery at age 55 after being overweight or obese for most of my life (and REALLY obese after age 30). I spent literally decades on pretty much every diet known to man. The most I'd ever lose was about 50 lbs (usually it was more like 10 or 20 lbs). Then inevitably, I'd gain it back. As I got into my 50s, at over 300 lbs, I was afraid I'd never live to see my 60th birthday unless I got that weight off. I, too, never had any medical issues with it - no diabetes, no heart issues - all vitals were within the normal range - but i knew all that was likely just around the corner - if not an early death - if I didn't do something about my weight.

I went to several info sessions on weight loss surgery put on by different surgeons and clinics just to see what it was all about. This started about 10 years before I actually decided to have the surgery. The one where I made the decision to go through with it was one where the surgeon leading the seminar had a big chart that went over all the benefits (80% reduction in this health issue, 100% reduction in this other health issue, blah blah blah - he went through a whole litany of problems obese people typically have, and how much the surgery was likely to improve or eliminate them). So I decided then and there that the benefit was well worth the cost, and I was going to do it.

I, too, was worried about the horror stories - but weighing almost 400 lbs was also a horror story - a horror story waiting to happen. Plus those horror stories are rare. As Arabesque said, people post about problems because they're looking for advice or support. Those of us who never had issues aren't likely to post about that (e.g., "I had surgery four years ago and never had any problems!!" (you occasionally do see a post like that - esp when we're trying to reassure people who are scared to do it, but overall, people are much more likely to post if they've had a problem, since again, they're looking for support)). Also, the surgical techniques have vastly improved over the years, and having weight loss surgery nowadays is quite safe - it's not like it was back in the 60s and 70s, when it really WAS a risky proposition.

anyway, I'm part of the crowd who say their only regret is that they didn't have the surgery sooner. In retrospect, I don't know why I waited so long. Best decision I ever made!

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Mine was different. I am older, so I have Medicare. My husband was a veteran, so I also have Tricare. I look through the sites occasionally, just because there are changes over the years to coverage, fees, etc. I have always struggled with my weight, but as I got older and less active, I gain a pound here and there. Well--over the last 3 to 4 years, I eventually went on BP meds. Imagine my surprise when I saw that a BMI of 35 and over, with a co-morbidity (as in diabetes, OR high blood pressure) could qualify you for them paying for the WLS! Took six months of jumping through various hoops, and here I am. (Everybody thought I was nuts, but other than the nausea, I have never looked back.)

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I was diagnosed with diabetes and told that if I didn't do something in 5 years I was going to have some serious issues. Cured of diabetes and 140 lbs later, I also wish I would have done it sooner. I know you don't have any health problems, but the keyword is YET. You don't have them YET.

When I was your age, I didn't seriously contemplate the surgery because back then it was too new (I'm 48 now) and it was the full open you from stem to stern unlike the 5 little incisions now. You have to weigh all your options and do what works for you, but if I were your age with today's surgery and knowing what I know now... I'd do it.

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One day during lockdown I just realised I would never lose all of it on my own and that I would never be happy if I didn’t lose it.
I was 28 when I had the surgery (last summer) and no real medical issues to speak of.
That said.. now I’ve lost over 110 pounds, I can feel how brutal those years with all those extra pounds were on my feet, on my knees, on my back… I feel like it was only a matter of time before I would have really started to struggle physically.

I am so so so glad I got this done now and didn’t wait longer. I would have done it sooner had I known what it would be like. I got my life back and I have the whole rest of it to enjoy and partake in all the fun things that I couldn’t/wouldn’t before.
I personally think that every year, month, even DAY that you get back is worth this.
The joy of seeing people again, the socialising, the going places, stopping for coffee (do I fit? Of course I do!), shopping wherever I like, going to amusement parks, swimming pools, playing with kids, hiking… I could think of dozens more things to add.

It is a risk.. but for me personally, I figured I could choose between suffering while definitely getting worse in the future, or giving it a shot and most likely NOT suffering and actually getting better in the future.

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During COVID I was trying and actually losing weight by dieting and exercising on a treadmill at home. Until my knees started to hurt pretty bad after just a short ways on the treadmill. I was a BMI of around 33 then and the weight was already taking a toll on my knees. Well then I took some time off the treadmill as the dr suggested and started to gain it back (the little I had lost). I just realized then that the problem was only going to snowball with every pound I gained.

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I saw one of buddies Dad at a event I go to every year in Tennessee. He took this picture of us to send back to my friend. When I saw it I couldn't believe what I had done to myself.

That was my it moment.

I realized even though I still did a lot even at 575# if I didn't do something soon my girls would not have me in their lives. I was such an angry person too. Simple things other people did upset me because I knew how hard it would be for me to do.

btw I'm 31 and wish I would have done WLS in my early 20's instead of YoYoing for so many years.

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