I have a 16 yr old daughter who is beautiful and very talented (biased I know). She is a kind child and other kids are often jealous of her. I have tried to deal with the situations off and on now, but I'm really sick and damn tired of it. It's unbelievable to me how backstabbing and downright mean kids can be.

Yesterday my daughter was in the lunchroom when this girl she doesn't even know very well insists that she called her a slut. Mind you my daughter is sitting there minding her own business with a table of football players and a few cheerleaders. The girl absolutely went nuts on her. She was up in her face and screaming and yelling like a wild woman. The table of football players started yelling "Flavo Flav" (not sure what that means) at this crazy girl and another table of boys started throwing food at her. Everyone was irate but yet the teacher did nothing. (maybe she didnt' hear not sure)

Anyway, when they were leaving the cafeteria some of the boys started getting worried and told Dani to report this because the girl is really unstable. Dani didn't want to but eventually broke down crying and was taken to the office where a report was completed.

Now I'm even more mad just thinking about the things that this girl will come up with. My daughter is a straight A student, never been in trouble in her life, but I'm sure this girl is going to say all kinds of things when she has to answer to the principal.

IF ANYONE HAS BEEN THROUGH THESE THINGS AND CAN OFFER ADVICE IT WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED AS I'M AT MY WITT'S END!!!

My son is 16 yrs younger than I am . I had him at 16 . So it has not been that long since i have been out of high school. I would not want to be there now for my life.

My son is popular, attractive, a football player, friendly , but doesnt have a girlfriend. I asked him the other night why he doesnt hav ea girl friend, He said " MOM girls in highschool have too much crap going on with them , too much drama i just dont want to deal with it ~ I cant say i blame him either.

Mindy

Yes, they can, but at the same time, they get over things quickly.. One day they are fighting the next they are BFF... As parents, our first instinct is to protect, but sometimes we need to give our kids the ability to learn to deal with things on their own. I think that is part of growing up and becoming mature young adults.

I agree unless their safety is being threatened. It sounds to me like the girl who went off on Becky's daughter was nuts.

My son is 16 yrs younger than I am . I had him at 16 . So it has not been that long since i have been out of high school. I would not want to be there now for my life.

My son is popular, attractive, a football player, friendly , but doesnt have a girlfriend. I asked him the other night why he doesnt hav ea girl friend, He said " MOM girls in highschool have too much crap going on with them , too much drama i just dont want to deal with it ~ I cant say i blame him either.

Mindy

Mindy - it sounds like your son is smart! :eek:

No offense intended - but, I think it is hard to understand unless you have kids and have dealt with some of this . . . I can't imagine that I would have known how I would feel either before.

I was about to say the SAME THING. School is not the same as it was even less than 15 yrs ago when we were in school ( we i mean myself) the girls are just plain VICIOUS . And unless you have children you have NO IDEA what kids go through now .

the girls for some reason seem to be more mean , hateful than in my time too!

the kids have so much more to deal with than just school

Mindy

Mindy - it sounds like your son is smart! :eek:

LOL My husband keeps trying to "push" Him into getting a girl friend and I asked him last week " WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU leave him alone " LOL if he doesnt want one leave him be , he'll get one when he's ready .

Ill be plenty happy with going through the next 3 yrs watching him play football and not having to deal with girls at my house ! LOL

Mindy

Mindy -

I totally agree . . . I am older than you, but do remember 'girl crap' from when I was the age my daughter is now, and it is so much worse now.

My husband doesn't have the ability to get it, apparently . . . I asked him just the other night, "When was the last time you were a hormonal, PMS'ing, started your period right before the game started, dramatic, 14 year-old girl???? Oh that's right - NEVER !!!" He backed off . . .

It is sort of the same - dad's, people who haven't lived it . . . I don't think they have any idea how it is to be a teenager right now. I feel for these kids, all of them - even the shitty acting ones.

It sounds like you are smart and your husband is a man. Ha - I agree with you . . . I have a son too and I have no desire to rush the girlfriend thing.

thread titles like this one...

Like putting a big red button in front of me that says "DO NOT TOUCH!"

Thanks for all the advice ladies. Mindy - I think your son is probably genius level! HEHEHE Here's what happened:

I called school twice and he didn't call me back. I went to get my daughter this morning to go for her driving test and asked to speak with him then. Before the lady picked up the phone to fine him he walked up behind her and asked her to pull Dani out of class. We both laughed and then he realized who I was. I was kind of glad it happened that way. Anyway, yesterday he talked to the girls involved, including witnesses, and all "didn't want to get involved" because they are friend's with the other girl's sister and with Dani. He went over some of the details and said he thought the other girl had many holes in her story, but suggested we leave it alone. I asked about the tape and he showed it to me. Unfortunately, it has no audio and all we could see because of the poor quality was the other girl going over to the table and yelling at Dani. Good thing was it confirmed Dani never got out of her seat. He said he has told them it better stop right now..... I don't feel a lot of anything was accomplished. He didn't confirm the other girls' disciplinary problems even. I simply let him know that it won't be tolerated. I advised him I felt they were on notice of this problem and if something happened they can anticipate having some answers to give. I didn't want to be too ugly because I truthfully believe he did what he could. If no one wanted to get involved - what else could he do??

On the flip side of that, I'm so upset with Dani. She has this one friend who uses her constantly. She is the biggest trouble maker, but could walk through fire and not even smell like smoke. She always stirs things up, and I feel she had a lot to do with this incident. She claims she is Dani's best friend, but her actions sure speak differently. Dani put her as her witness. Some witness!!!

I STILL HATE TEENAGE GIRLS!!!

Thanks for all the advice ladies. Mindy - I think your son is probably genius level! HEHEHE Here's what happened:

I called school twice and he didn't call me back. I went to get my daughter this morning to go for her driving test and asked to speak with him then. Before the lady picked up the phone to fine him he walked up behind her and asked her to pull Dani out of class. We both laughed and then he realized who I was. I was kind of glad it happened that way. Anyway, yesterday he talked to the girls involved, including witnesses, and all "didn't want to get involved" because they are friend's with the other girl's sister and with Dani. He went over some of the details and said he thought the other girl had many holes in her story, but suggested we leave it alone. I asked about the tape and he showed it to me. Unfortunately, it has no audio and all we could see because of the poor quality was the other girl going over to the table and yelling at Dani. Good thing was it confirmed Dani never got out of her seat. He said he has told them it better stop right now..... I don't feel a lot of anything was accomplished. He didn't confirm the other girls' disciplinary problems even. I simply let him know that it won't be tolerated. I advised him I felt they were on notice of this problem and if something happened they can anticipate having some answers to give. I didn't want to be too ugly because I truthfully believe he did what he could. If no one wanted to get involved - what else could he do??

On the flip side of that, I'm so upset with Dani. She has this one friend who uses her constantly. She is the biggest trouble maker, but could walk through fire and not even smell like smoke. She always stirs things up, and I feel she had a lot to do with this incident. She claims she is Dani's best friend, but her actions sure speak differently. Dani put her as her witness. Some witness!!!

I STILL HATE TEENAGE GIRLS!!!

It sounds like they did what they could with what they had. Just FYI Legally the school can not tell you anything about the other student, if she has dispiline problems , has been in trouble before or even if she's a perfect angel. That is why that happened.

Girls sure can be mean and it sounds like this friend, like you said had something to do with this deal . I hope Dani comes to her senses.

At the very least maybe have a talk with her and not allow her to hang out with this girl out side of school ? Then you run the risk of her doing it MORE ?

Mindy

I had a talk with Dani last night, and unfortunately it got a little out of hand. I ended up getting really angry at her because she doesn't want to ditch the troublemaker "Emma". I think she is afraid of backlash from it, because truly this child always gets her way and is very convincing to everyone. It's amazing, even the ones she has burned goes back for more. I think I understand it now though, they're just like Dani, afraid of the backlash. I would hate to think I raised such a a child!!

Becky , can Dani just slowly back away from Dani , be busy alot ?

For one tell Dani to watch what she tells this girl . She CAN Control that . Tell her to not confide in this girl at ALL . Its one things to be "friends" with someone who can "Ruin" You in high school its another to be "Best friends" with someone . I understand her not wanting back lash but she doesnt have to give her ammo !

mindy

Mindy: That's a good idea, and what she has started to do. I do understand her point a little too, but like you said, she doesn't have to be "best friends".

Mindy: That's a good idea, and what she has started to do. I do understand her point a little too, but like you said, she doesn't have to be "best friends".

Try to put yourself back in high school. Try to think like the little snots again LMAO Its hard , i have a little more insight, My sister is 16 and goes to the same school as my son , I see every side , sometimes too much !

Mindy