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So mad at myself for regain



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YES!!!!! ^^^^this!

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I am in the same place & totally beside myself. I lost 60lbs from sleeve and felt amazing. but have gained back 25 in the 2.5 years. It’s been a steady rise and I keep watching it, and then getting crazed, but then letting it slide. My wine consumption is a big problem. Starting to feel embarrassed about it and shame. I have been on this path so many times just feeling so low. Trying to regroup and get myself back in the right mindset. Hope you can do it too.

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I too am upset with myself after 8 years being sleeved, I’ve gained back about 55 lbs. However I remember I lost 120 lbs and I’m not putting on anymore. I have suffered w acid reflux from the sleeve and now awaiting approval for a revision. Hang in there....time for us to focus. To remember the why I have a pic of me at my highest weight.

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On 3/20/2020 at 5:27 AM, Debbieduck4 said:

I can't believe I'm in this place again! I was sleeved in December 2014 and lost 101 pounds. I was thrilled and kept the weight off for 5 years. Then slowly but surely I began to gain... I have been eating whatever I want, not exercising, and basically just being a slug. I finally got the courage up to weigh myself and see the damage, and I've gained 40 pounds!! I have tried to return to the basics but feel constant hunger. I am depressed and pretty hard on myself. I don't like the way I look and I feel like a loser (not a weight loss loser either). I guess I'm just looking for advice, encouragement, and tips to get this weight back off. Thanks community

Well you just answered your own question.... Get back to eating right.. get your mind in the game..

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We are in a very special circumstance. We have been able through weight loss surgery(WLS) to get a gigantic boost to lose weight. We are able to lose that weight effortlessly without much work. (Beside the process and procedure of WLS) We have this superpower that we never had before, rapid weight loss. Some in my support group have told me, you can go to sleep for six months and the weight will still come off. It's a superpower that we want to believe will last forever. Then one day we lose our superpower. We are now mere mortals in the weight loss world. A pound regain turns to two, then four then....you know the rest.

It's not so easy to lose the weight as it was after WLS. In fact we find ourselves in the same circumstance we were in prior to WLS. Struggling to lose weight and feeling hopeless and discouraged that we can't lose it as fast as we did post WLS. I know that feeling well. Prior to WLS I lost a lot of weight (60lbs) and you guessed it I regained it all back and then some. For 17 years I struggled to lose the weight as my body deteriorated with heart disease, diabetes, GERD, high blood pressure, gout and other maladies. I was taking so much medication that put both my liver and kidneys were in danger of failing me. I decided on WLS. I was taking 11 plus pills a day. The day I walked out of the hospital I was prescribed two pills.

I did not want to repeat my mistake of years ago and I made my goal weight my "RED ALERT" weight. I weight myself every week on the same day and same time to monitor my weight. After slipping on a vacation ( ate pastries) I realized that I needed additional help. I sought a therapist who specializes in eating disorders and was diagnosed as a compulsive over eater.She recommended that I seek the help of Overeaters Anonymous. I attend OA meetings as well as the group meetings my surgeon sets up.

During Covid my meetings with support groups and the therapist were curtailed and I subsequently gained weight. I could not lose the weight no matter what I tried. I too despaired and lamented that my brief flirtation with my weight loss superpowers were over. Fortunately for me I have a few family and friends that had WLS after I had mine and we are our own support group. ( I encourage people to hook up with other WLS patients and call, not write or text them to get as much support as you can) I was directed to You Tube videos on intermittent fasting and cutting out late night snacking. It's been 18 days since I stopped eating after 7PM and starting again at 8AM. I have lost the weight plus an additional pound. I have regained my confidence (which is very important) and I can see a clearer path to maintaining my health with my weight loss.

Gaining weight and not being able to take it off as fast as we once did is very crushing to us on so many levels. It hinders our ability to effectively lose the weight and it returns us to regaining more and giving up. Please don't give up. Many here have given you excellent choices to help you. I fortunately have a great support group of family and friends who I can tap for ideas "outside of the box". One poster here had a 45lb regain and was able to lose it. That in itself is a great motivator. For those of us who have lost our weight loss superpowers, don't despair, learn new tactics, resist old ones that work but never ever give up. Your good health is too important.

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I hope this finds each of you well and making progress toward new goals or maintaining. Just checking in to see how the last seven months have been.

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Thank you so much everyone for replying to my post! You've all been so helpful. Just thought I'd provide an update. I took a good hard look at things, started writing down everything I was eating, and figured out I had gotten into a really bad habit of grazing all day long. I am a crisis responder who works nights 12PM-12AM and wasn't planning for meals. I would just grab a bunch of Snacks (fairly healthy but still not the best) and head out. I decided to make a change by giving myself actual meal times and planning for them, with 2 snacks a day. For my weird schedule I'm having Breakfast (an egg and bacon or sausage) at noon, lunch at 3PM (a salad with protein), and dinner at 7PM (Some sort of Protein and veggies). I've been having nuts around 5PM for snack #1 (thank you for the suggestion!), and then around 9PM eating for the final time with snack #2 of fruit or popcorn. It's working.. I'm down 10 pounds and feeling better! I really appreciate all of the suggestions, encouragement, and help here at Bariatric Pal and am prioritizing a daily visit to the site again like I used to. Take care everyone! XOXO

Edited by Debbieduck4

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I can relate! I have been off of this forum for a year but really should have stuck with it. I kept the weight off until March when my husband got COVID but then I ate every cookie and every chocolate bar I could get my hands on. The damage was 10-12 pounds, thankfully, but I'm finally psychologically ready to get back on track. I kicked myself in the ass for gaining weight, but that didn't fix the problem and I had to remember why I had the surgery in the first place. So I started in Keto two weeks ago and have lost 4 lbs and feel like I'm headed in the right direction, even through the holidays I feel confident that I can do it. You can too!

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On 10/19/2020 at 9:13 AM, Danny Paul said:

We have this superpower that we never had before, rapid weight loss. Some in my support group have told me, you can go to sleep for six months and the weight will still come off. It's a superpower that we want to believe will last forever. Then one day we lose our superpower. We are now mere mortals in the weight loss world. A pound regain turns to two, then four then....you know the rest.

Great post, Danny Paul! Ultimately, that time when it's easy is when we have the chance to build our healthy habits and for anyone who kept their weight off for a while, you know you had a bunch of healthy habits built up! After almost 13 years of maintaining my weight, i have more years living as a healthy-eating, healthy-weighted adult than i did living in a cycle of on-again off-again yo-yo dieting before I had WLS. Sometimes i get off track, and that's when i have to remind myself what healthy eating looks like, and work to rebuild my consistency with my habits.

I really do believe that regains are a part of this journey and they're something we will all face throughout our post-op lives. Our tool is still there for us though, and with some mindset changes, and some structure, we can get ourselves back on course. It's never easy though, and it's not something your average person can understand which is why it can be helpful to seek support from other WLS vets.

Here are a couple of things that have worked for me and a couple that haven't. Keep fighting the good fight guys!!

My Good Habits:

  1. Eat Meals (don't graze) - don't skip breakfast, even if it's small
  2. Eat Real food, not processed slider foods like chips and sweets
  3. STOP eating after 7PM - get away from the kitchen after dinner. Evenings have always been my toughest time and so i make myself a cup of Decaf coffee, take it upstairs with me, and don't go back to the kitchen under any circumstances.
  4. Focus on Food - 80% of weight loss comes down to food
  5. Cook Your Own Food, but keep it simple - make sure you have meal options available in the fridge or ready to make at a moment’s notice.
  6. Move for Mental Health - aiming for 10K steps works for me and calms my urge to stress eat
  7. Talk to someone about mental health - overeating for me is a sure sign that's i'm heading on a downward spiral and the weigh gain and guilt and shame associated just makes it worse...see a doctor, find a medication that works for you, find your way back to a good mental health state

Things i that have NOT worked for me:

  1. Liquids / Protein Shakes - it's not sustainable (and really hard for even a few days...how did we do it pre- and post-op?), it makes me unbearably grouchy, and the minute i stop the weight comes back on.
  2. Counting Calories - that is a trigger for me after a LIFETIME of dieting and i don't want to go there!
  3. Starving - if I’m starving, I won’t be able to do it for long and the rebound will be bad!
  4. Excessive exercise - it's too hard to outrun a bad diet with exercise and getting hurt would be a sure way to halt my progress.

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On 11/19/2020 at 5:16 PM, Lauren_Dew said:

My Good Habits:

  1. Eat Meals (don't graze) - don't skip Breakfast, even if it's small
  2. Eat Real food, not processed slider foods like chips and sweets
  3. STOP eating after 7PM - get away from the kitchen after dinner. Evenings have always been my toughest time and so i make myself a cup of Decaf coffee, take it upstairs with me, and don't go back to the kitchen under any circumstances.
  4. Focus on food - 80% of weight loss comes down to food
  5. Cook Your Own Food, but keep it simple - make sure you have meal options available in the fridge or ready to make at a moment’s notice.

Lauren I'm with you 100%. Since day one I made a promise to myself not to eat processed foods and for 95% of the time I'm on board with it. I start each day with a cup of coffee (wait 30 minutes) then eat my breakfast which is a yogurt and hard boiled egg. In September after a weight gain and a spike in my A1c I stopped eating at 7PM and didn't eat agin until 8AM. This seems to have been a missing part of my weight maintenance. As for food I prepare and cook my dinners but for lunch it's usually a can fish such as sardines, tuna or salmon. Thanks for the tips. Every little bit helps in this life long struggle. Continue the healthy life.

Edited by Danny Paul

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I truly understand what you’re going through. It’s a terrible feeling to have enjoyed your years of weight loss after surgery and have to look in your closet at the smaller clothes that keeps moving farther and farther to the back of the closet. It’s been 8 years since my gastric sleeve surgery and I’ve gained 50lbs back. For the pass few years I’ve tried resetting my pouch as they say, that didn’t work. Going back to eating the way I was eating at the beginning of the program that didn’t last two weeks. I tried, I’ve been angry at myself, I’ve been depressed as heck.....I don’t dress up anymore. I use to dress up, do double takes in the mirror at how nice I looked before walking out the door just to go to the grocery store. How could I have done this to myself again. I don’t know if this will be a solution for you but thank God the intermittent fasting, that I have tried several time before is truly working well for me this time. I prepare meals to keep in the freezer, I keep plenty of bottle Water near me. If hungry hits or tv commercials show food after food I grab a bottle of water drink drink drink. Losing regained weight seems worse than the first time. But hang in there one day you will surprise yourself.

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I’ve had about 35 lbs of regain, all during the pandemic. I am not mad at myself about this, and I wouldn’t want anyone else to be mad about their pandemic regain either. Motivated to lose it? Absolutely, yes! But we’ve just been through a societal upheaval that disrupted almost every pattern and STARTED with repeated panics about food scarcity - hardly normal for your brain to deal with.

I’ve been weighing myself throughout, so I loosely knew what was happening. It was all grazing, plus some higher-calorie indulgences (like cocoa instead of tea). A considerable amount of it is likely related to going from one glass of wine every week to up to two glasses of wine per night - stress relief that never got dangerous but absolutely got fattening. About three months ago I realized I was at a point where things were getting dumb, and plateau’d. I’ve been in the same 5 lb band since.

Yesterday my parents got their first vaccination, and today is the first day I’ve coordinated jewelry in probably 6 months. Some switch has flipped to make me remember that I’m actually going to have to reenter society soon, and I’d prefer to fit into my nice jeans when I do. I’m going back to shakes and string cheese and peppermint tea, all the baseline stuff. I don’t get hungry anymore, which is great, but this is going to be a big reorientation. But the time feels right, and I’ve seen too many people on this site follow exactly this path and get back to their goal weight to beat myself up about it.

It’s a pandemic. We all ate more, we all drank more, the entire population carb loaded on sourdough for the first two months! But now the winter is over and hopefully soon the pandemic will be too, so the time feels right to get back on track. We can all do it.

Edited by sideeye

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On 4/1/2020 at 5:35 PM, catwoman7 said:

this is only based on other longer-terms vets I know on forums and IRL, but I think after the second or third year post-op, it's pretty much a daily battle for most of us...

My VSG doctor required a therapist appointment prior to surgery. The main thing I remember her saying was the hard part starts at 18 months to 2 years post op. I remember thinking that after that amount of time, it should be routine and a habit, but she was right. My weight gain started about 2 1/2 years post op and got worse in 2020. Now I am also working on losing what I've gained using the 10-day pouch reset diet.

I had been of BP for a couple of years, but got back on for the tips and support of the forum.

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