Why do so many bandsters set their goal weights so high? I mean, many of the ones that I've seen aren't anywhere near a healthy weight. Yes, it might be healthier than their starting weight, but it still isn't a normal weight. Is it a fear of failure? Is it because the doctors set their patients' goal weights high in order to fudge their weight-loss statistics? Why not aim for a healthy weight? Why aim for a weight that is still considered to be "obese," in many cases?

I can understand someone deciding that the weight they are currently at is one that they feel good at, but I just don't understand making the logic of "well, I just wouldn't look right if I weighed less than X pounds."

The perfectionism comes from the drive to "win" and the extremes between winning and losing. You don't win if you do something halfway, you fail. And since you won't do something you will fail at, you're going to win, and through winning, you're also going to try and make sure it's done the best it has ever been done. To an A, perfectionism isn't perfectionism, it's doing it right, doing it in a way that reflects them personally, etc.

If you think back to our MBTI conversation, INTJs will be As. And if anything is true about them, it's that they know what they know, and they also know what they don't know.

Take debate. An A will debate something they know until they're blue in the face, because they know it. They will not pipe up on a topic they know little about, they will just stay out of it - be a passive observer at most. For one, they're not about to be called out for not knowing what they're talking about, and for two, if they don't already know it, it's probably not that significant to them.

*Ahem* Guiltily raises hand, after sneaking peeks around her.

Well, I think anyone who has ever seen me operate in RnR knows what I am. And yes, I am a VERY strong INTJ, according to the MBTI.

Lol Kat, I am a VERY typical Leo!

Lol Kat, I am a VERY typical Leo!

When's your birthday? Mine is August 2, so howdy from a fellow Leo!

Well...........lets see...........Kat817.........LOL August 17th! My DH is August 3rd. He is not a typical Leo, and if possible even less so than I am.

I have a friend who is totally into the astrology stuff, that I know nothing about, she tells me it is because he has a rising sign of Gemini....means zilch to me!!!

Kat

I deleted my post because quite frankly I'm tired of trying to explain myself to YOU! If you go back and read my posts, It has never been about you! I said for me, and only me, that would be too skinny. I have a big ass and I have even bigger boobs who don't disappear with weight loss. When I was weighing 135 I looked very thin, for ME. I had liposculpture of my whole/entire body, arms, back, waist,ass, inner and outer thighs, and a tummy tuck. Every spot on my body was reduced of fat and so at 135-137, I looked fabulous and was not fat anymore. My husband loved me FAT, so I guess at 135 I was at a good healthy weight and looked beautiful to HIM. He was also afraid that I was getting too obsessed with my weight loss. I hardly wanted to eat and was fanatically excercising and was totally consumed by wanting more.. I guess that is were his concern came from. It was at that point that I re-evaluated myself and decided that was a good weight FOR ME!

If you think that because I am not as thin as you are (because I"m your same height, of course) that I am morbidly obese, then that is your problem and not mine. I think you have to stop obsessing with what you think others think of you. You are totally consuming yourself with this.. Who cares what the hell others or I think. If you feel great and healthy at that weight, then good for you. I wish you would admit though that there can be something such as too thin/skinny.. Yes, Nicole and the Olsen girl were anorexic and were too damn skinny. Nicole was down to 90 lbs and that I don't care what the hell anybody thinks, is not healthy and she looked like a walking skeleton. You on the other hand, look very toned and healthy in your pictures. But oh hell, I'm done with trying to get you to understand that IT IS NOT ALL ABOUT YOU!

(I am replying to the underlined part)

I said you are morbidly obese now did I?

Nope. I don't remember that part.

If you feel fat 135, that's YOUR problem. Not mine. Poor old chickie doent give a dogs fart what shape, size or weight YOU are. And she has said this over, and over and over.... She just want's people like YOU to leave her alone!

If you feel fat 135, that's YOUR problem. Not mine. Poor old chickie doent give a dogs fart what shape, size or weight YOU are. And she has said this over, and over and over.... She just want's people like YOU to leave her alone!

Like I said on the other thread, why are you not understanding what you read??? I said I looked faboulous at 135, where did I say I looked fat?? Come on, just get over it. And my post originally was NOT ABOUT YOU!! You are so damn fascinated with yourself..I only started repying to you, when you made this about you.. Oh God, you have some serious skinny issues..

Okay, Okay if it will make you feel better about yourself.. I am your same height and I weigh 135.. I am gross and obese. If I want to be perfect, I have to be a size 0 like Chickie.. I will make that my life GOAL, NOT!

This is ridiculous, I'm not in highschool anymore.. so I thought!

Oh, and I am going away to a fabulous spa for the weekend, so I will be unable to post, just in case you come and attack me again, that is. Have a wonderful weekend, everyone.

Oh, and I am going away to a fabulous spa for the weekend, so I will be unable to post

Oh April! A SPA??? I am truly envious!! Have a wonderful and relaxing time.

OK, this has died and lets not start arguing again, but I just thought I'd share some information that I saw on telly this morning about healthy weight/BMI etc. Its interesting for everyone and supports BOTH sides of the argument!

Recent studies have shown you can be plumper (as in BMI 26-30) and that it could be good for your health. BUT - and this is a big BUT - the expert that was talking says there's general consensus that BMI is a pretty useless indicator of correct weight as health depends on how much fat you have and where you carry it. As an example, I have a BMI of 23 but still have a body fat level of about 30, so I still do technically have too much fat! BMI doesnt take into account high muscularity either.

What she said was that a much better indication is waist measurement and that surprisingly waist measurement does not increase with height - so it is possible to set an ideal range and it will be relevent for ALL people, tall or short.

For women, your waist measurement should be below 80cm which is 30 inches. Any more than that and you've got too much fat round your middle and you're at increased risk of diabetes and cardiovascular disease.

That means those short, curvaceous types of women who tend to look good rounder as they're cute and curvy (and never look flabby you know?) have to be quite careful as they tend to carry more in their middles, whereas pear shapes (like me, ugh) who have bigger bums and thighs and tend to need to be skinnier to look good or they just look flabby can actually carry more weight without affecting health because they dont carry it round their waists.

food for thought. It's no more reliable than any other studies out there, although its pretty much a given that abdominal fat = bad, they've known that for a long time.

So really, correct weight for you is the point at which you get your waist measurement below 80cm and after that, its a matter of fine tuning to look how you want to look.

Are you saying you have a body-fat percentage of 30%? How on earth is that even possible, considering what you look like and the exercise you do? I just got measured yesterday at 29% bodyfat, and I've got a considerable way to go. I know men and women have different fat contents, but I'm shocked to see you might be at 30%.

Truly, I think the measurement was wrong. It was an idiot girl at the gym, using scales just liek I have at home, which can vary by 10% per day!

But I do still have plenty of fat, too much! And my waist measurement is 78cm, so I only just scrape in there - obviously for ME, its not possible to be 20lb over my healthy weight range and not be at risk, heck, at the top of my healthy weight range my waist measurement is over 80cm!

I think for some, setting a high goal weight is a fear of failure, but it can also be realisitc for someone who has been large their entire adult life and doesn't even know if their body's can get to a low weight like that.

I'm 5'4" and my Dr's told me that my BMI should be under 25 for me not to be considered overweight. I've studied the BMI charts and I've had my body fat percent tested. I set my first goal as 150 which is a BMI of 25. Then I thought, that's not challenging for me. If I'm going to do this, let's DO THIS and get to a healthy range. When I was a freshman in high school I weighed about 146 and was a size 9/11 Juniors. I figure If I can get down to 135 I'll be a size 8 or so. I'm good with that.

Jachut - Good info. There was something similar on NPR (National Public Radio) here yesterday. Made me late back from lunch listening to it in the car. The general gist the US doc was trying to convey was that some recent study found that for a BMI of "normal" vs "overweight" (NOT "obese" or higher) they were finding mixed results. Mixed in the sense that for some health issues such as diabetes being it was better to be in the "normal" BMI range but for other issues such as Heart Disease the "overweight" BMI range showed NO increased risk. Even more surprisingly for issues such as Parkinsons and another (maybe a type of cancer, I can't remember) you actually were better off in the "overweight" category as opposed to "normal" OR "obese & higher". This study did NOT NOT NOT say it was better to be overweight than normal across the board. But that both categories had its positives and negative.

PERSONALLY - I view the results as similar to things like birth control pills, that can help your odds with one disease but increase your odds for another one.

They did say too that it was better to be in the overweight category and fit than to be leaner and very unfit.

Fitness is a very important factor, I believe. But again, what people call fit...... well, I have quite stubborn views on that too, lol. Perhaps we wont even go there?

It's an interesting topic. I hear (and have probably said) "I'm fat, but healthy."

Obviously this is a bit of an oxymoron.

When I say it, I use it as "I'm fat, but I don't have manifested health problems yet."

But there are certainly people out there who think they can be morbidly obese & healthy.

I kind of have to call BS and point to the whole denial thing, just like I do when I hear "fat and happy" or "fat and proud of it." That's a protective wall and serves its purpose, but I know of no morbidly obese people who don't wish they were thinner. I also don't know many overweight people who don't suffer from at least situational - if not clinical - depression.