I recently told two of my very close family members about my decision to have WLS. They are extremely supportive, understanding, and curious about the surgeries, process, etc. One of the things that came to me while we were talking is the following analogy. I still have that nagging guilt that this is something I should be able to do on my own - but when I thought about this analogy something clicked for me. I wondered what others thought about it or if you would change anything.

Weight loss is like climbing a mountain. It takes planning, strategy, tools, strength, support from like-minded friends, and plain hard work. But it's even more challenging because all the climbers are carrying a boulder on their backs. The size and weight of the boulder is different for every person because it's decided by things like genetics, age, medical conditions, amount of excess weight, personality, outlook, community support, and others.

Some people are just really strong, or maybe their boulders are pretty small, and so they are able to make it to the top under their own steam. Some people are able to make it partway up the mountain, but have to stop and stay there. They may even fall back to the ground. But, unfortunately, for most of us the boulders are too big for us to get more than a few feet off the ground, and every time we fail it gets a little bigger and a little heavier and we get a little wearier. Some people are able to shrink their boulders a little, by therapy or meditation, but still aren't able to make it all the way.

Weight loss surgery is like having a friend who says, "You know, that looks really hard and I want you to succeed. I'll take that boulder off and hold it while you make the climb." You still have to do the work of climbing, every difficult and sweaty minute of it. You still need the tools, and the support of your friends. But you don't have the heavy rock weighing you down. It's not a guarantee you'll be successful, but without the burden of carrying that boulder, you finally have your best shot at making it to the top.

What are your thoughts? I started to overanalyze things a bit and started thinking, well after the mountain, maybe maintenance is like a hike with a pack or something LOL but I didn't want to take it too far and get it all muddled. Let me know if this helps you in any way, if you'd change part of it, or anything else.

-Annie

I think this is a great analogy! I started climbing my mountain many times only to get injured and fall down to the beginning. ? Decided many times it wasn't worth it. Until I decided I really need to do some preventive care before I hit 40 next year....I was a "healthy" fat person...and wouldn't have been for long if I didn't do something about it.

Happy climbing y'all!

1 hour ago, Newme17 said:

I think this is a great analogy! I started climbing my mountain many times only to get injured and fall down to the beginning. ? Decided many times it wasn't worth it. Until I decided I really need to do some preventive care before I hit 40 next year....I was a "healthy" fat person...and wouldn't have been for long if I didn't do something about it.

Happy climbing y'all!

Love it! I've enjoyed reading your posts around the BP forums. Happy climbing to you too!

1 hour ago, Little Green said:

Love it! I've enjoyed reading your posts around the BP forums. Happy climbing to you too!

Ah thank you hon. I stay inspired being here and encouraging others the best I can as well. Thanks again!!

I enjoyed the analogy. It was very thought-provoking.

In my case, weight loss wasn't my problem. I was the queen of losing weight. I've lost 200+ pounds over the years (lose 50 then regain 60, lose 60 then regain 100) and reached a normal weight multiple times.

My problem was I couldn't keep the weight off.

So when people say, "Why have surgery? You can get a personal trainer and go on a diet to lose the weight," I respond, "I can lose weight without surgery, but surgery is my only hope for keeping it off."

28 minutes ago, Introversion said:

"I can lose weight without surgery, but surgery is my only hope for keeping it off."

I have to agree. My climb is a little different, I think if I was still the 25 year old who had the mindset of healthy eating, etc, it'd be easier to do and keep off. I've changed (almost 40) and my life has changed that I needed this reset. I technically could lose the weight, but that would entail me to really put my kids, hubby, work, everything I've got on the back burner and focus solely on myself. I don't have time for that like I did at 25. Even now, I'm still juggling my WLS diet and exercise around my family; but it's the push I needed to reset and keep weight off.

Great analogy! I have one also that I thought about when preparing for surgery. My weight issue is very similar to the smoker or alcoholic that won't quit. That person may already have or eventually will have some related health problems that will need to be addressed. Although that person may be embarrassed about how they got to that point, no one would fault them to have the necessary lung or liver surgery if they needed it to survive. The surgery alone does not solve the issue though, there's still a difficult road ahead to be able to quit the habit, change lifestyles, get the needed support, and eventually just maintain/continue to abstain from the habits that are killing you.

I decided that I would be up front with my friends and family about my decision for surgery and my quest for better health, and it surprised me that just about everyone I've told has been supportive and understanding. I also feel it keeps me accountable since I know many people are watching my progress and cheering me on and there's no way I'm going through such a huge life changing process only for it to fail!

I'm 7 days post op and 47 lbs down, I'm on my way to the new me!

HW: 330

SW: 294 6/27/2017

CW: 282

GW: 180

VSG, Dr. Jawad, Orlando, FL

Great analogy. What really resonated was that we still have to do the hard work of the climb, but without the boulder that was holding us back.

thanks for posting it. I am going to keep this visual in my mind today.

19 hours ago, Little Green said:

I recently told two of my very close family members about my decision to have WLS. They are extremely supportive, understanding, and curious about the surgeries, process, etc. One of the things that came to me while we were talking is the following analogy. I still have that nagging guilt that this is something I should be able to do on my own - but when I thought about this analogy something clicked for me. I wondered what others thought about it or if you would change anything.

Weight loss is like climbing a mountain. It takes planning, strategy, tools, strength, support from like-minded friends, and plain hard work. But it's even more challenging because all the climbers are carrying a boulder on their backs. The size and weight of the boulder is different for every person because it's decided by things like genetics, age, medical conditions, amount of excess weight, personality, outlook, community support, and others.

Some people are just really strong, or maybe their boulders are pretty small, and so they are able to make it to the top under their own steam. Some people are able to make it partway up the mountain, but have to stop and stay there. They may even fall back to the ground. But, unfortunately, for most of us the boulders are too big for us to get more than a few feet off the ground, and every time we fail it gets a little bigger and a little heavier and we get a little wearier. Some people are able to shrink their boulders a little, by therapy or meditation, but still aren't able to make it all the way.

Weight loss surgery is like having a friend who says, "You know, that looks really hard and I want you to succeed. I'll take that boulder off and hold it while you make the climb." You still have to do the work of climbing, every difficult and sweaty minute of it. You still need the tools, and the support of your friends. But you don't have the heavy rock weighing you down. It's not a guarantee you'll be successful, but without the burden of carrying that boulder, you finally have your best shot at making it to the top.

What are your thoughts? I started to overanalyze things a bit and started thinking, well after the mountain, maybe maintenance is like a hike with a pack or something LOL but I didn't want to take it too far and get it all muddled. Let me know if this helps you in any way, if you'd change part of it, or anything else.

-Annie

Annie, those words are truly inspiring and I will remember these words because it is an accurate depiction of what i feel as well as others.

I really needed to read this today. I have been struggling with guilt and trying to figure out if this is the right path for me. Thank you so much for the analogy.

On 7/4/2017 at 10:00 PM, Introversion said:

I enjoyed the analogy. It was very thought-provoking.

In my case, weight loss wasn't my problem. I was the queen of losing weight. I've lost 200+ pounds over the years (lose 50 then regain 60, lose 60 then regain 100) and reached a normal weight multiple times.

My problem was I couldn't keep the weight off.

So when people say, "Why have surgery? You can get a personal trainer and go on a diet to lose the weight," I respond, "I can lose weight without surgery, but surgery is my only hope for keeping it off."

Great point! The maintenance of excess weight lost is the whole point, really. I lost 80 pounds like it was nothing a couple years ago. All but 10 pounds of it is back now and my boulder feels like it doubled in size.

22 hours ago, VSG_Man_Vs_Food said:

Great analogy! I have one also that I thought about when preparing for surgery. My weight issue is very similar to the smoker or alcoholic that won't quit. That person may already have or eventually will have some related health problems that will need to be addressed. Although that person may be embarrassed about how they got to that point, no one would fault them to have the necessary lung or liver surgery if they needed it to survive. The surgery alone does not solve the issue though, there's still a difficult road ahead to be able to quit the habit, change lifestyles, get the needed support, and eventually just maintain/continue to abstain from the habits that are killing you.

<snip>

Those are good analogies too! One of the things my therapist says about my (hopefully in-the-past-now) attitude toward making mistakes with eating is that I'm like an alcoholic who says, "Well I had a drink so I fell off the wagon. Might as well have the whole bottle." You know those days when you give in and have something sweet or eat too much at a potluck... then you're like, "f**k it I might as well have the ice cream and the McDonald's or whatever I want." Definitely trying to get better about that! Just because you had one drink/one unhealthy meal does not mean you're doomed to failure. Maybe in the mountain analogy that is like if your foot slips while you're climbing, you don't have to let go completely and drop, just hang on and try to find a new foothold.

You could also draw some similarities between alcoholism/drug addiction and overeating/obesity because they are chemistry-driven diseases in our bodies but the mechanisms are still somewhat poorly understood compared to other diseases. And, in our society we moralize them and make them into solely willpower issues.

The one thing that's different is the alcoholic or drug addict can live without booze or pills... we can't live without food. That's what makes it so hard!

Thanks for your analogy as well, it helped to think about that! Congrats on being a week post-op!

12 hours ago, deeveg said:

Great analogy. What really resonated was that we still have to do the hard work of the climb, but without the boulder that was holding us back.

thanks for posting it. I am going to keep this visual in my mind today.

Yessss... thank you. That is what made the difference for me and I was like, I have to post this even though it's a little cheesy. I still get the sort of pinned-down feeling about how WLS is "cheating" or the "easy way out." Because yes, it is easier. But there's still so much work and planning and plain mental toughness involved in being successful. If I can add to the analogy again, I feel like people think WLS is having a helicopter come pick you & your boulder up and carry you to the top of the mountain, but it's not at all. The more I have researched and read the more serious I have become about making permanent changes because that is the only way it will work.

11 hours ago, Sweet as peaches said:

Annie, those words are truly inspiring and I will remember these words because it is an accurate depiction of what i feel as well as others.

Thank you so much! That means a lot. I feel like this is going to really help me explain to others in my life why some people need WLS to be successful.

10 hours ago, TXgirl915 said:

I really needed to read this today. I have been struggling with guilt and trying to figure out if this is the right path for me. Thank you so much for the analogy.

The guilt is really a problem for me as well. Even preop I already feel embarrassment that I "had to have" WLS to lose weight. Just today on facebook I saw a video making the rounds about a man on YouTube (I forget his username) who lost hundreds of pounds and then had skin removal surgery. The title was, "What's your excuse?" Against my better judgment I read the comments and it was filled with "I bet he had gastric bypass." "It's easy when you have surgery to stop you from eating." "I could do that if I could afford surgery, too." and so on. It's like all the work he did, even though they could literally see video of him sweating and working his ass off, was invalidated because he (may have) had surgery. Very frustrating. So, I'm going to keep this in my back pocket for those days when I get that in-the-spotlight feeling of guilt. You're very welcome by the way and thanks so much for responding.