I'm in the final stages of getting the band. Waiting for insurance approval and setting the date. My aunt who was extremely overweight 450+ had gastric bypass surgery 9/11/01 and died a year later from complications from the surgery. I've told my mother and my best friend and they completely support me in getting the band and will be there for me. I'm not going to tell the rest of the family. I know the subject is extremely touchy and don't need any negative comments. Has anyone else had to keep their surgery under wraps? How have you delt with it?

That sounds like my family tell them one thing and they all will know with in the hour.

Do what you have to do and when the time is right you will tell them if you want to

I think now that I am a month out I might be more willing to talk to ppl about having the Lap band. I really think I was hesitant of talking about it because I didnt know for sure how things would go after being banded. Now I see things are going pretty smoothly and I am feeling more relaxed. Next step will be getting my 1st fill and getting into a excercise routine..

I only told my mom. Before the surgery, I was thinking that I would tell more people later on, maybe when I am close to my goal. Now I am thinking "why bother?!":heh:

I told everyone I thought would be supportive, I don't need any negitive energy in my life, I got rid of that along time ago.

I didn't tell anyone at first. Now only one person knows. It is a very personal decision in my opinion. Some people love to shout from the rooftops that they have a band and I support them 100%, but I am a very private person in all areas of my life, so I didn't feel that it concerned anyone else. Best of luck to you!

I'm with you socal - I only told wife, mom and dad - I did tell a buddy about it because he had it done a year ago and he told me - so we can be a support to each other - beyond that it's nobodys business - no one at work has said jack crap to me about dropping 82 LB's - my inlaws have noticed but we haven't said anything to them - only possible leak is my dad and I swore him to serecy and death if he opened his big trap about it - I will tell my BF when/if he ever comes home from back east - for now all he knows is I've lost weight from the ticker on my blog - but that's just me - as so many here have said "I'm a private person" - if you want people to know go for it.

I initially only told about 4 people - my best friends. Only one of them is negative about it - but I truely believe that that is only because her insurence wonlt cover it and she is about 200 pounds overweight. She's never been able to stay on a diet longer than a month, and she always had me as a friend that was fatter than her.

Anyway... these 4 people told most of their family... which I guess is fine. I don't care too much about that.

NO ONE in MY family or ANY co-workers know. I have not lied to them, only mentioned that I've given up fast food and colas, and bread, and... well ALOT. Lol. As I continue to lose weight and they see that I'm not gaining it back in a few months then I'm sure more questions will surface... I'm not too worried about that. I really was only worried that I would be unable to keep the secret, because I am very close to my family!! But I've had 2 aunts and my dad have had the bypass and they've all gained ALL of their weight back, so I don't feel that they would be very supportive.

Besides... one of my cousins has now given up fast food and colas too!! I don't want to ruin her own dietary progress by saying "Oh, well I had surgery, but if I could have those things I would!" Lol.

re: questions 'what are you doing?' - I'm telling them pretty much the same thing - no soda, no fast food, no bread, rice - lo carbin' it - ridin' my bike, doin' my laps- all of which is true - I'm not really counting calories or anything

Wow great responses, I think that is what I will tell ppl also. Being only a month out and only 16 pounds lost no one has really said any thing. But when the time comes and they start to notice I wont feel untruthful by telling any one that I am just eating healthier and trying to exercise more.

Would love to hear if any one has any problems with gas and diarrhea starting around their 1 month mark...All had been great but this week it driving me nuts..

it gets easier everyday

no gas and the exact opposite of diarhea cha cha cha - TMI? sorry

I only told one of my friends and my mom. I would like to tell my brother and my dad because I think it might help them, but it is amazing how much trouble my friend and mom have keeping it from people. Its like they have to say something. My mom had to tell people I was having surgery on my ovaries. I asked her how I could have the surgery and no one at work even knew I was having anything done and she even had to mention I was having surgery, couldn't she have said she was coming out to visit just to visit. Evidently this didn't cross her mind. I say if you don't want people to know tell as few people as possible. Even the people with the best intentions can't seem to keep things quiet.

Not sure what to do... My college aged daughter and husband are the only ones that know. I'm having surgery in 7 days. I told people at work that it was girl surgery, and that I was having problems. I have a very difficult boss and work environment. I wouldn't be surprised if they find out that I would lose my job. :embarassed:

I just don't want the judgement and the looks you get. So many people think its a cake walk. That you go to the Dr. sign up, go to surgery and boom a couple of months later your thin.

This has to be one of the hardest things I have every attempted. It's definitely a life changing experience for the better.

I have not gotten a lot of support for my husband or daughter. We don't even talk about unless it has to do with the date of my surgery, or how it will effect them.

Kasey - I am sorry to read that your DH & DD aren't being very supportive. I know that must be hard for you.. but you said it all in this one sentence It's definitely a life changing experience for the better.

And it is a LIFE changing decision as you will now for a life time (as long as you are banded) have a tool to help you control your portions, which in turn will help you make better food choices and add some exercise in your life. As these things are the real secret to your weight loss.

Good Luck on this journey and when you need support we will be here for you.

I have told no one except my parents and my doctor. I don't think I will be mentioning it to anyone else. I don't want to have to deal with all the talk behind my back, or any questions of how much weight have I lost, what am I eating etc... Maybe later on if I feel I can help someone by sharing my experience I will for now...it's our little secret :confused:

I TOO HAVE KEPT IT A SECRET FROM ALL MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS. ONLY MY HUSBAND AND MY SMALL DAUGHTER KNOW ABOUT IT. JUDGING BY THE GENERAL CONVERSATIONS I HAVE HAD ABOUT BANDING WITH MY FAMILY AND CERTAIN FRIENDS THEY WOULD BE TOO NEGATIVE ABOUT IT THEY SEEM TO FEEL IT,S THE EASY OPTION:omg: WE KNOW BETTER DON,T WE?

why is it that everyone seems to assume this is the easy way out... it really isn't you still gotta watch yur sweets and high fat foods.. and excercise or you won't lose the weight... I mean intiially we all lose weight quickly but then levels out and the wok has to start... the band is a tool not a miracle worker... u gotta work together with the band to be successful.

(:tireddont mind me it's 3:45 am in chicago and im stuck at work so the sleep deprivation maybe talking a little , i've now been up fr 19hrs :ranger:)