I decided to do the gastric sleeve about 2 years ago but couldn't follow through with it because we had a child. Now I am having my surgery on Dec 14th and he is causing me more stress than anything. It's not just arguing it's now physical. I don't even know if I am driving myself to the hospital or what's going on with our 3 kids. He just plays these games. Any advice on what I should do? I have no family and really no friends since I just moved to where I am 18 months ago.

I just got out of a very similar situation. My husband was controlling and abusive. I got a protection order against him last month. He even went as far as tried to contest it. The judge of course upheld it. You can do it. I didn't even know how I would have gas in my car let alone pay my bills, but God provided. I am completely alone as well except for my son. We had recently moved to a new state....well 2 years ago and because he was so controlling I was not allowed friends. So I don't know anyone here. And I will be taking a taxi to and from the hospital. But I tell you it is the courageous thing I have ever done. And I'm so glad I did. Each day I remind myself the hell that has finally left my home and the peace that has taken its place. Only you know what is best but please listen when I tell you. It only gets worse honey. I know exactly what you are going through.

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Thank you. I will fix this I will take an uber to and from the hospital and make sure not to make him mad. Than come the new year I should be healed and will figure it out. I just can't stress and he is causing too much right now.

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I'm sorry I didn't read your first quote correctly.. I have been in the situation you are in. I'm afraid for you. I would rethink this whole process. You need someone at home that you can count on. If he hurts you after surgery or doesn't take care of you you are in trouble. I really suggest you call the cops and get a restraining order on him. Protect yourself and your kids before making g such a big move and have this surgery. You can't trust him you can't be vulnerable after surgery around him. I'm very scared for you. Can't you move home with your mom and children. Start process there. Please think about this. I'm so sorry you are going through this. Why would you get arrest for calling the cops on him? Where do you live? What state?

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Just Waste No More Time

Call The Police, That's There Job

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@@funsize.ma - I won't repeat what others said above. I do share their concern for you. Okay, plan your food. Make sure you have what you need to eat/drink for the first couple weeks. You will feel terrible and it doesn't read like you can depend on anyone. Proactively plan and write down emergency numbers for your doctor, taxi, abuse shelter, etc. Let you oldest child know what to do if you need help. Prayers for you and your children.

Had lapband surgery 10/12/16

Where do u live

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Praying you may

Have to go back to your hometown to be safe, Nothing more important than being safe

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Call the domestic abuse hotline You can find it on your phone in your area. Do it now! Child Protective Services can take your kids if they find out they are living in this situation. There are resources to help you with everything! Don't make excuses because your life could depend on you and the kids out NOW

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http://www.whengeorgiasmiled.org/get-help/

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@@funsize.ma, what you're trying to write here is very confused. Do you have one child or three? Why would you go to jail if you call the police because you are being harmed physically? That makes no sense.

If this guy is hitting you, call the police. You and the child or children need to be taken to a safe place. You owe a safe place to the kids.

make sure not to make him mad.

My dear, good lady, your own thinking is a major problem for you. What would not make him "mad?" He could go nuts if you sneeze or if you smile. Getting yourself and your kid or kids to safety and calm comes before anything else. If it means postponing surgery, then postpone surgery until your life is in better shape.

If you're not sure how to get help apart from calling the police, let us know where you live -- your city and state -- so that we can find out for you. There are city, town and county services and there are social service agencies that provide the kind of help that would make sense for you. I have worked as a volunteer for an organization that provided help for victims of domestic abuse. I think I'd be able to find the right thing for you to call.

Edited December 11, 20169 yr by WLSResources/ClothingExch

I'm having trouble with this as well because it seems that you are not quite ready for this surgery from a mental perspective.

Mental stress can affect your physical healing.

What you need to do is first get away from the abusive party, next you can talk to the doctors about next steps. They can help you with the resources needed that will get you to a safe place both mentally and physically.

Then talk surgery after all of that have been resolved

What state are you in?

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I'll pray for God to provide a way and keep you and your children safe.

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