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Relationship after sleeves?



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I go for my post op appointment in 2 weeks and will be sleeved on 11/3.

So anxious! It finally coming near, I have worked so hard all year for this.

Though my fiancé has been completely supportive of me throughout this whole process now that the date is here I can see worry in his face... that I will change who I am in the inside as well.

He won't say it, but I see it. I know when you look up things on the internet it's a higher rate of break ups after weight loss surgery.

I just want to know some first hand results after surgery and maybe some advice? Any advice will help.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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I had been married 30 years when I had my surgery. My husband supported me in his usual, quite, passive way. Meaning he wasn't exactly a cheerleader, he didn't even accompany me to Mexico, and he certainly didn't join in on any of my new eating habits. But he never discourage me or try to sabotage me in any way. He probably would have been more worried about the surgery itself if it weren't for our daughter. She is a doctor and encouraged me to have the surgery, which of course made him more comfortable with it.

He didn't marry a thin gal, but I was a lot bigger at the time of surgery than I Was when we met. I couldn't do a lot of the physical outdoor activities we used to do together, and that was a strain on both of us. We never stopped caring about or loving each other, but there wasn't a lot of pizzaz left in our marriage. Since losing my weight, we have actually become closer and our relationship stronger. I think mostly because of the confidence I found in myself and the fact we could once again be a "team". Fortunately he is not threatened by the new and improved Mary and has not had any issues with jealousy....even though I point out to him all the time how hot I am ;). That seems to be one of the biggest problems I've observed when one partner suddenly becomes more "desirable" to the opposite sex. Of course I'm a grandma, so things might be different as a young couple.

In the end, I don't think WLS causes the breakups. If couples split after one of them loses weight, then there were already problems with the relationship. I wish you all the best and always remember guys can be just as insecure as us and they need to know we love them....no matter what size we are.

Edited by Dairymary

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