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What to tell people?

I've read all the chains on who to tell. My question is we have family friends who are wanting to make plans to go on trips i.e. camping and ATV riding now that it's getting to be fall. They're looking at the weekend of and the weekend after my surgery. Obviously I can't go for a while after surgery and without telling them what's going on, I feel like we are just blowing them off. The husband keeps suggesting dates, and my husband keeps replying with "we're busy , I don't know what we're doing, but we're busy". I'm not sure what to say. I don't want to lie, but I also don't want to share this. Any suggestions?

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I like to fall back on the standard...."I'm having female problems" . When asked what kind of female problems by well meaning female relatives I just said, "It's very personal". That is usually enough to halt all additional conversation. Later you will be asked how did you do it? How did you lose all that weight. My standard answer was, "it was a lot of dedication to my health, diet and Dr's orders. I would also add that I followed a low carb, high Protein diet. If people wanted specifics I would just say well, no more than 40 carbs a day, at least 70 grams of protein, 70-100 ounces of Water daily and under 1000 calories. You have to just skirt around the edges if you don't want to advertise the fact that you had surgery for weight loss. It's NO ONES BUSINESS but yours and your mate. Some people are very open about it but others know that the type of friends or family they have will look down on it as "taking the easy way out". I'm here to tell you there is nothing EASY about major surgery...

I have to agree with you on saying female problems. Sometimes once you say that either someone just gives you the oh I understand or they want to tell you a story to try to explain they can relate.

Stephanie - I'm definitely going to use the diet specifics you gave because I have a lot of nosy ppl at my job and it's none of their business about my decision. My husband and I thought about this for a few years because my arthritis has been so bad I've been getting injections and have really bad moments where I can hardly walk. I'm tired because I can't even go to the gym like I use to. This isn't the easy way out at all and it's a very personal decision.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

I know many people just come out and tell what went on but this to me anyway is extremely personal. Someone did approach me (at church of all places) and quite loudly said, "I heard you had weight loss surgery!" I just looked at her and said, "REALLY? Who told you that?" She kind of sputtered at that point and moved away saying she didn't want to break a confidence. I just looked at her with a smile and said that's as good as anything else I've heard. She was obviously guessing and trying to make me spill the Beans by saying it at church. I don't think most people will get into your business but some will and you have to be prepared for those people. One of the things I said when asked about my losing weight was, "well, you know I was in the hospital for a bit, after that "scare" I knew I had to lose weight and my Drs insisted that for my future health it was imperative. So I set my mind to it and I am doing it with my Drs supervision" Then you can go on to tell them your strict diet plan and that you weigh in every month at the Drs office. etc. Sometimes by the time you have talked their ear off on diet, exercise etc they are sorry they even asked. Yes, sometimes I feel like I'm lying but then again I don't feel badly lying to people who are gossip mongers, just nosy etc. I am doing something very personal and it's no one else business. Do what you have to do for YOU. No one else has a say so in what you do for YOU. It's just that personal. If you want to tell the world be my guest but if you choose to keep it your secret then it's up to you how you handle it.

I didn't tell anyone until a week before surgery. Then I told my team of co workers (who are guys). They asked a few questions and after a few weeks it was a non-issue. I have also told some female co workers and I have received some ugly/ignorant comments from them. My experience is that the women have reacted negatively a lot more than the men have, which I find interesting. I don't regret telling people though. I didn't expect anything from them anyway I just share now if it comes up in conversation. I don't feel the need to make something up that isn't true. If they are judging me now, then when I was a bigger person, they were judging me then too. I am very comfortable and very happy with my decision. By being open, I hope that maybe my experience can help someone else.

I was very proud of my decition for my gastric bypass surgery i told everyone and i was shock how everybody was supportive and no negative coments so dont be afraid telling ppl thats is nothing wrong with getting help to be helthy

Gall bladder surgery will be my excuse

You Got This!!

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