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Pre-Op NSV!
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I haven't had surgery yet, but I'm very close and have completed most of the pre-surgery homework... but I just wanted to share a pretty awesome moment I had recently!
In my excitement to start my weight loss journey, I've tried to get in much more exercise in, since I'm feeling VERY gung-ho! I'm playing tennis more regularly, I went on a backpacking trip, and I just joined (again) a Cross Fit gym.
....A little backstory: I've gone up and down and up and down with my weight over the last 15+ years, yo-yo dieting and trying every exercise and eating trend in order to fight the obesity disease (sound familiar?) losing 20 or 30 pounds using these diets and workout trends, just to gain them back and more once I slip. And I don't think that people who haven't been overweight understand this, and assume that every challenge can be solved with white-knuckling the problem and often stigmatize and judge tools like weight loss surgery, rather than the traditional "just work out more"...
So, anyway, back to me joining this new gym. I really liked the vibe, the trainer was totally not a "bro" trainer, he was very nice and encouraging, and the gym was filled with a variety of body types and ages. MUCH different than the last CF gym I'd gone to! I was excited! But then the trainer told me he was going to do everything in his power to convince me out of surgery (which I'd disclosed to him earlier, privately). It was like there was a spotlight on me and my choices and my weight and my seeming choice to take the "easy way out". And my social anxiety almost had me tucking back into my shell like a turtle.
But here's where it gets good. OLD Sarah would have slunk down and maybe even quit the gym out of embarrassment, or worry that I'd be pressured into changing my mind on a very personal decision I've already committed to and gotten excited about and am completely ready for! OLD Sarah wouldn't have said a peep. This time, I spoke up for myself and told him that while I totally hear him, and appreciate the encouragement, I won't be changing my mind, but I WILL be trying my hardest to teach my body how to work harder and do better with his class. And then I asked, "Deal?" Right then and there I cut off the judgement and the opportunity for this (well intending) trainer to think he gets to decide for me what's best for me, instead of me!
It doesn't seem like an enormous moment, probably, to most people. But I have such a confidence issue that it was a shining light into my future of even more confidence and I'm really really happy about that. So I thought I'd share it!
Have any of you ever had people try and chime into your decision, try to talk you out of it, or make you feel bad for this decision? I've largely kept it pretty private, with the exception of my husband, my boss and a few close friends, because I don't want others to think they can proffer their opinion about it, when it's not their deal, it's mine!
Ahhhh! Anyway, that's my pre-op non scale victory!!
Edited by swizzle