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To Tell or Not To Tell...

Are you all very OPEN with family, friends, neighbors, co-workers about your LB decision? Just curious... I'm afraid to say too much to anyone... what if (((I))) fail?

Did you just wait until people started noticing your weight loss? Explain it when you have an office luncheon? Avoid social gnoshing with friends?

I think that's what it boils down to... the fear of failing at this... After a lifetime of failing at one weight loss attempt after another... (I do have a positive attitude about this... but you all know that nagging voice... don't you?)

katie:ranger:

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I am also waiting for a date.......I've picked one, just waiting for the surgeon to comfirm. (Aug 24) As far as telling and not telling? I chose to reveal to certain people at different stages. I haven't told everyone as of yet and I have had mixed reviews.:rolleyes Most have been positive.

I have decided to not really tell anyone about it for a while. The only people that know that I'm thinking about it is my Husband of course and my Mother. As far as I'm concerned that's all that needs to know.

At this point, I'm not sharing with anyone but my husband. My parents would be worried, it would be stress on them that they don't need. They freaked out about me getting my wisdom teeth out a few years ago!

Maybe after I start really losing, I will have to say something but that is how I'm feeling right now.

good for you ,i choose to keep mine a secret ,no need for any down talk. i am now going thru the paperwork

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"you can't un-tell" people keeps ringing in my head... I'm not sure I even want to tell our two (adult) kids... Maybe after things start going well and they're tripping over all the pounds I'll be dropping on the floor...

I am close with some people at work and not sure what I'll tell them other than I'm having "a repair" surgery... or just go "on vacation" for 2 weeks...

Guess I'll make it up as I go along.:)

i want tell . will go on vacation from work. i plan to do a wonderful job,however no one need to monitor what i eat or advise if i need to stop..

KtKt,

I was banded 6-19 and decided to tell all family and close friends. Everyone has been so supportive and helpful. The only thing I've noticed is that a "well intended" family member asked how I was doing and I said great and they said, "Oh I know you'll do wonderful, so and so had it done and she's lost 56 lbs in 2 months! I'm sure it's just going to fall off of you!!" I know it was meant as encouragement, but first of all that weight loss sounds hard to believe and it felt like pressure for me. I'm still not sorry I told, just wondering if others have had that same "comparison" thing to deal with. Just something to remember when making your decision. Good luck to you! It's the best thing I've ever done for myself.

don't bother--the outside world (those people who I saw LAST year on the 4th of July) thought I just got a new haircut!! So much for casual aquaintences--I lost over 100 lbs!! Just shows that you are only the bride at your own wedding!! Those who care about you will know/ask--the others just forget about!!

sweetviolet,

Wow! A new haircut?! They must have thought that was some great haircut girl!! 100lbs..congratulations!! I can't wait until I get my new hair-do oneday! LOL! Keep up the good work...Are you at goal now?

Hello all, This subject hits close to home for me. When I first started looking in to getting this done, I said I was gonna tell my mom and boyfriend and my best friend only. I started telling more people as I went to more appointments. I feel very uncomfortable about my weight. I dont like going to get togethers for this reason. I did not want my boyfriend to tell his mom shes very out spoken. I knew I would hear all kind of sh*t from her. Well his dumb butt told her. She brought it up to me and I was shocked that she knew. I was like please dont tell know one else. She was like ok. Welllllllllllllll, today his brother came in from Texas. She calls me up and is like, you need to talk to Virginia(his brothers wife) she said that band is bad for you, blah blah blah, i was like i dont want to talk to her about it. She said well she lost 80lbs in a year. I was like well good for her. (only met her once) His mom said well you need to do more research on that thing its not gonna help ya. You just need to quit eating and get off your buttttt. uhhhhhhhhhhh, I was sooo mad. I just wanted to hang up on her. I wanted to say uhhh who came over for threee days in a row to clean your house before your company came in town, was it your skinny daughter in laws, uhhhhhhh no it was this fat one that needs to get off her butt. OOOOOOOOoh im just furious about this. So this is the reason I did not want no one to know. Everybody thinks just cause your fat you eat like a dozen eggs, a lb of bacon and a loaf of bread for breakfast. UHHHH ok im done lol thanks for reading!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thats my delema i dont even want to tell my parents who see me everyday incase i fail and then there is the issue of one of my sisters who has the biggest mouth my mother will feel the need to tell her and it will end up on the front page of the enquirer!!!!!! I also need support!!! so Im in a pickle. I have discussed it with my mom and husband and younger sister ive even told a couple of my friends what Im planning to do but i think when it comes to the time i might just keep it a secret. I to dont want to be judged after all im doing this for me and me only and do not need people watching my every move and I really believe that that will be the case. I really need to think long and hard and i suggest you do to cos as its already been said once you tell you cant untell and thats the hardest part. Good luck in what ever you choose to do!!:)

I chose to tell very few people before my surgery and even then, it wasn't till the week of my surgery. I only told people who I knew would be positive and supportive. The people who I thought would be negative didn't find out till after. I had my surgery 6/27. I am already tired of is people asking me what I had to eat any time they call! I don't get that.

My new standard answer is going to be :FOOD!::confused:

I've practically worn a sign around my neck for the past two and a half months saying "I'VE BEEN BANDED!! WOOHOO!!!" Seriously, I've told anyone who's anyone especially to overweight ppl like myself, simply because I think it's the greatest thing in the world and I feel like I just want to share the wealth. By nature I'm a thick skinned bastard so for those few ppl that have a problem with it, and make comments about it, I either just give them the finger (hey, I AM from ny :confused: ) or I just ignore them. I will say though, that sometimes, ppl that know will definitely watch what I'm eating and when I eat more than what they think I'm able to eat they'll be like "oh you can still eat pretty nicely." That can be annoying, but the truth is, up till my last fill I also felt like I can still eat too much so I agreed with them.

Bottom line is, you gotta know your friends. If you think they'll be nonsupporting, then just show up in your new body and let them eat their heart out. If they are the supportive type, then let them enjoy the journey with you.

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