This year is a year of change for me. I got sleeved in February and lost over 100lbs so far. I am feeling better and can do things I couldn't do for years. With that said, sadly I am feeling very lonely still. My birthday is coming up next month and I will be 39 and alone. Another year that way and it sucks. Hopefully as I keep losing and things get better, my situation will change. It would just be nice to find someone to share this life with.

Oh I have no doubt you will. You switch that time thinking about the loneliness onto yourself. Your going to make a lot of changes in a years time. Mrs. Right is out there, you just keep working on her Mr Right! Happy early birthday to you!!

@@Daveo she's out there looking for you...get out and be open minded and like @@Elode said keep working on her Mr. Right.

Daveo, I have been married over 35 years, so am not an authority on finding a woman....I know alot about keeping a woman! However, one of my children who was alone for 20+ years and had pretty much given up on finding a partner has in fact found a permanent life partner, I just met her and she is wonderful. How did she do it? She got involved with a group of singles at a large church, even though she was not especially religious. She went to dances. She volunteered. And she found her sweetie. I expect she will marry this one.... having said this, I know that being alone can be tough, I don't mean to offer glib solutions, I know it is painful.

The more you are able to do the more you will fill your life with joy. When you get there you will attract a beautiful soul to you. Hang in there, someone wonderful is waiting for you! Happy birthday!

Edited August 6, 201510 yr by ShrinkingPeach

Thanks everyone, yeah I need to get out and be more active. I have more energy now and getting out and being social is a goal.

Happy Birthday! You are going to have a great year!

Do what you love, have fun, and be of service and who knows who will come into your life.

I never had trouble dating, but since I have been married to an amazingly hot woman for 8yrs, I can no longer as the the kids say "be a playa" so I'm gonna give you my secret, I saw your pic and there is nothing wrong with you, so as funny as it sounds at first listen carefully: always use the 3 rules,

No. 1 women, even beautiful ones, are just as insecure as men most of the time, they want a (not need) guy who always comes through for them even when they are at their worst.

No. 2 always carry yourself with confidence (not cocky) and tell yourself that YOU can date anyone you want, and it's your choice.

No. 3 unfortunately because it's primal and most women never even know they are doing it, they can smell

INSECURITY!!!! , wear nice clothes, deodorant and a very light "woodsy" cologne, it throws their scent scanner off, and always smile no matter what.

I hope that was funny and made you laugh, but believe it or not most of it is true, unless your gonna be a moron and ask a woman to go to bed with you the first time you meet her, in which case it may be followed by a bloody nose or damage inflicted with a swift kick to your "Boys" then the worst she can say is "no"or "no thanks" but you gotta try, regret is the worst thing to remember on your death bed when your old...... Try it!!!!

@@laguerr13 thanks for the advice and yes it made me laugh! lol but yeah I see what you are saying.

You just be you Daveo, be humble and kind and adjust your jewels once in awhile just as a reminder.........

Try bookstores connected to coffee houses, grab a latest Stephen King hardback, order a frappacino ( skinny) and sit back on their patio, or even better take the book to a Hooka place........ Yes on my deathbed I will tell my grandkids of grandpa's big weekend with 2 Persian girls he met at a Hooka place while reading an obscure ghost story book from "Strauss" I don't make this stuff up, it's been an interesting life.....lol

she is out there waiting for you. Don't be lonely, we are all here to support you . When you aren't looking for someone, is when they will drop in your life. One forward step at at time

I have a different situation - I have been "coupled" my whole life until the last few years! I feel good, look good... seems like I should have a permanent man by now. I don't for alot of reasons - and one of em is I just won't settle.

Until the right lady comes along, i really suggest defocusing on that and instead focusing on building the kind of life that women want to be a part of! Get out, do fun stuff, meet people, cultivate hobbies and interests, volunteer, become expert at something - I don't know, whatever floats your boat but live a great life and great people will want to be a part of it!

I am currently dating a man who does not match my physical ideal at all, but he makes me feel wonderful, he has such an interesting life, he is so musically talented and people respect and adore him for it - people are drawn to people who are content, and living a happy, genuine life.

A man asked once where he could meet some nice ladies (not a bar scene ) , and I told him " I didn't know as I am happily married. However, if I was looking, I would go where the men are. I like camping, fishing, walking, travel, , anything outdoors etc. So if you're a guy looking for a nice girl, go where they go ! Sign up for a cooking class, volunteer at any place ! The local animal shelter always need help, if you like fishing or are mechanical or like to fix things, put out the word ! Women find it very attractive when men are willing to help others. ( Getting healthy and in shape will get you noticed too ! ) And you ' ll be meeting women with like minded hobbies too. Hope this helps ! Good luck !!

Until the right lady comes along, i really suggest defocusing on that and instead focusing on building the kind of life that women want to be a part of! Get out, do fun stuff, meet people, cultivate hobbies and interests, volunteer, become expert at something - I don't know, whatever floats your boat but live a great life and great people will want to be a part of it!

This is spot on!!

There's some good advice here ... just concentrate on being happy and living your life for yourself. When you're happy in yourself, that's when you are best equipped to be happy in a relationship. Funnily enough, after a run of bad relationships a few years back, I decided to focus on my son, my career and myself. And wouldn't you know it, a couple of months later I met a bloke and the rest, as they say, is history. Next March we'll have been married for 20 years and sure, there are times I'd happily trade him for a box of Valium, but we're pretty happy 99 percent of the time!

@@Daveo,

Happy Birthday! Congratulations on your incredible weight loss!

There is so much great advice already posted so I don't have much more to offer other than to reinforce what others have said.

You seem like a really sweet guy and your girl is waiting for you! Be yourself and get yourself out there. Someone else said this as well, women (even the most beautiful ones) have insecurities. Every girl looks for their Mr. Right, someone to treat them with respect, someone to be good to them throughout their life, someone to love.

She is out there alone and waiting for you! Seize the day! Your day is coming, I am sure of it.