Lying to feel better?!?

[LipstickLady 25,682]

When I look at before and after, I am usually so focused on the magnificence of their smiles and the brightening of their eyes, I miss the camel toe.

[Rogofulm 2,440]

When I look at before and after, I am usually so focused on the magnificence of their smiles and the brightening of their eyes, I miss the camel toe.

I just snarfed Crystal Light out my nose!

[jess9395 5,450]

Okay... But what about their post is a LIE? You seem so caught up in them LYING. Whether they look good or not is clearly open to debate and how someone responds is open to debate but those are all opinions, where is the LIE?

[DreamingAzure 30]

Okay... But what about their post is a LIE? You seem so caught up in them LYING. Whether they look good or not is clearly open to debate and how someone responds is open to debate but those are all opinions, where is the LIE?

It's not the people in the photo lying, it is in the people responding I see lying... And I'm not talking about the before and after posts or the progress pictures. I'm taking specifically about the people who post pictures and ask for an opinion. For example a young lady who had lost almost100# but still a ways from goal,posted a couple of pictures the other day on one of the face book groups I'm in. She had an event coming up and wanted some feedback about 2 possible dress choices. The first dress was a skin tight short cocktail type sheath that showed every bulge she had left and made her seem heavier than she really was. 2nd dress was also a shorter cocktail dress but had a flair skirt that hid the bulge and was very flattering. Due to different makers they were a size different. Looking at the pictures you would have thought that dress #1 was a before picture and #2 the after. Yet a large number of women told her to buy #1 simple because it was an 8 and not a size 10. To me that is lying and doing a disservice to the people we are suppose to be supporting.

[jess9395 5,450]

Okay... But what about their post is a LIE? You seem so caught up in them LYING. Whether they look good or not is clearly open to debate and how someone responds is open to debate but those are all opinions, where is the LIE?

It's not the people in the photo lying, it is in the people responding I see lying... And I'm not talking about the before and after posts or the progress pictures. I'm taking specifically about the people who post pictures and ask for an opinion. For example a young lady who had lost almost100# but still a ways from goal,posted a couple of pictures the other day on one of the face book groups I'm in. She had an event coming up and wanted some feedback about 2 possible dress choices. The first dress was a skin tight short cocktail type sheath that showed every bulge she had left and made her seem heavier than she really was. 2nd dress was also a shorter cocktail dress but had a flair skirt that hid the bulge and was very flattering. Due to different makers they were a size different. Looking at the pictures you would have thought that dress #1 was a before picture and #2 the after. Yet a large number of women told her to buy #1 simple because it was an 8 and not a size 10. To me that is lying and doing a disservice to the people we are suppose to be supporting.

Oh got it, thought you meant the posters were lying.

Well like everything else, you have to take anything you read on the Internet with a grain of salt...caveat emptor/buyer beware! I would never post on the Internet actually asking for advice on what to wear, lol!

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Okay... But what about their post is a LIE? You seem so caught up in them LYING. Whether they look good or not is clearly open to debate and how someone responds is open to debate but those are all opinions, where is the LIE?

It's not the people in the photo lying, it is in the people responding I see lying... And I'm not talking about the before and after posts or the progress pictures. I'm taking specifically about the people who post pictures and ask for an opinion. For example a young lady who had lost almost100# but still a ways from goal,posted a couple of pictures the other day on one of the face book groups I'm in. She had an event coming up and wanted some feedback about 2 possible dress choices. The first dress was a skin tight short cocktail type sheath that showed every bulge she had left and made her seem heavier than she really was. 2nd dress was also a shorter cocktail dress but had a flair skirt that hid the bulge and was very flattering. Due to different makers they were a size different. Looking at the pictures you would have thought that dress #1 was a before picture and #2 the after. Yet a large number of women told her to buy #1 simple because it was an 8 and not a size 10. To me that is lying and doing a disservice to the people we are suppose to be supporting.

Ahhhh...so now YOU are judging whether or not someone else is lying. Got it.

[chunkyloverlovesyou 197]

I agree with being honest, there should be a website/thread where people post pics of themselves and get back honest, constructive feedback. I would want to know if my clothes were so tight someone noticed my pubes-lol.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

I agree with being honest, there should be a website/thread where people post pics of themselves and get back honest, constructive feedback. I would want to know if my clothes were so tight someone noticed my pubes-lol.

Reddit. /r/amiugly

[mrs kaje 347]

I agree with being honest, there should be a website/thread where people post pics of themselves and get back honest, constructive feedback. I would want to know if my clothes were so tight someone noticed my pubes-lol.

Reddit. /r/amiugly

90% of those posts are just attention whores who already know they're not ugly.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Absolutely. But if you are, you are going to be told.

[CowgirlJane 14,261]

@@AvaFern it breaks my heart you were so mean to yourself. That is just awful.

This whole topic is fllled with venom. I cannot begin to fathom why someone has a rant over obese people getting trimmer and fitter and "finding their way" fashionwise in the process. I think it is joyeous to see someone who has been wearing plus sizes for a long time experiment with cute clothes.

I used to post pictures of myself in different outfits to try to even figure out my own sense of fashion and style. I have sort of " matured" out of that phase now but it was part of the process....and yes egos are very delicate during the weight loss journey. Be gentle.

[Kerry 5570 24]

Live and let live is what I say

[Swampdoggie 477]

Slightly off topic, my son used to sing "I like big butts and a kangaroooooo!" And well, who doesn't, really?

[Carin Boyer 90]

Knowing what we really look like after WLS can take longer than the weight loss itself.

I had my Lap Band Surgery in August 2008. Over 2 years I lost 100 pounds, going from 235 to 135.

Even at my heaviest, I was interested in fashion. But I found it difficult to find attractive, fashionable clothing that flattered my fuller frame. As I lost weight, I was thrilled that I could buy clothing in 'regular' sizes and shop in all types of stores.

Being able to select from a broader set of choices though didn't guarantee that I would make good ones. After 20 years as size 22, I didn't know what would look good on me as a 50 year old size 8!

So I made some less than ideal selections. Unflattering colors, cuts, styles, bad fits, insufficient undergarments etc. But it wasn't because I had bad taste. It was because I didn't have an accurate picture of what I looked like, my so-called self image, so I couldn't dress myself to look my best! That ultimately came by trial and error.

Now I realize I didn't really know what I looked like and what would flatter me until at least 2 years after I had completed my weight loss!!

So long story short, I think we need to have some compassion for ourselves and our fellow WLS pilgrims, because real success involves so much more than just the pounds we leave behind.

Carin Boyer, Founder, Thin Side Out Style

info@ThinSideOutStyle.com

[SimplySue 131]

My mama always said, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all". We are human, we are imperfect & after WLS, we are constantly learning. Be kind, be gentle or be quiet.