As I look around these forums being started some of the most common complaints are "people won't support my decision by bringing healthy foods." Um, not their job to cook healthy for you because you made a life changing decision. Just because they bring the foods they have always brought doesn't mean they are trying to destroy what you are doing, it is just all they know. You can't blame them, be mad at them, or accuse them of being destructive to your diet. You personally HAVE to find a way to deal with this. Everywhere we go there is food. Parties, funerals, celebrations, ANYTHING, there will be unhealthy foods at all of these.

It's just like this, if I have a party, I provide the food I want. In one party I could have a vegetarian show up, a gluten free person and one who is allergic to dairy. I can't prepare for all of these different kinds of people. If I have something they can eat, great. If I don't, they should have brought their own, or have eaten before they came. It is no different with our new lifestyle.

This isn't to say that it doesn't suck to watch people eat fried foods, fatty foods, or chocolate cake in front of us, but just because they are doing that doesn't mean they aren't supporting us. They are living their life they way they want. We can't change others, only ourselves.

Have a fantabulous, skinny day! Today is better than yesterday and together we will feel better!

This is so true. My bf feels bad when he eats foods in front of me that I can't have. I remind him all the time that my decision to change is mine alone and that doesn't mean he has to change. If he chooses to do so then great, but it needs to be his choice and not strictly a result of mine.

Edited July 11, 201412 yr by pookybear

You are spot on!

This is the most true thing I've read. I was just sleeved on Monday. My parents own a restaurant and on Tuesday night my sister brought home food, which happens to be my favorite item on the menu! At first I was kinda upset but then I realized she's not going to stop eating just because I can't.. The last couple of days have been much easier!

It's been an adjustment in our house. One of the things my hubby and I loved to do together was to cook and eat. He is finally realizing that we are going to cook what he wants and I will make it work for me. Tonight we made grilled chicken. Rice, corn on the cob. Fresh tomatoes and cucumbers.

I had 4 oz. of chicken and 3 cucumbers. It was fine. I slow down eating so that I am not done first and hubby takes the left overs to work.

Meatball1,

Cooking at home is something completely different. I do all the cooking in our home and it is now things I can eat also. My family doesn't mind the healthier kind of cooking. I just don't expect others to change their cooking style for me. That make sense?

I have been out to dinner with friends since my gastric bypass and ordered broth. I made the decision to change and so I will need to do all the modifying. One thing I keep thinking about is that I was raised to offer to bring something when invited to a dinner or party. By suggesting to bring something, I guarantee that there will be something there that I can eat.

On the flip side, I have friends who have food allergies and every time we have a get together, they ask everyone if they have any food issues so that they might be kind in accommodating others needs. They are absolutely lovely people and I am blessed to have friends such as this.

In the end, I do feel it is up to me though!

Lisa, that is great you have friends who will help you out!

I had to repeatedly tell my 2 teenaged boys it's OK if they eat what they want in front of me. They don't want to "smell up the house" and cook what they like but I told them this is my challenge and I'll live with it. It's certainly easier now that I'm on "real" food.

I found out at Red Robin you can add a patty onto a burger for $2... so, they order their big gigantic hamburgers with all the stuff and I add a patty on for $2. I'm a cheap date now!

Ginger

I had to repeatedly tell my 2 teenaged boys it's OK if they eat what they want in front of me. They don't want to "smell up the house" and cook what they like but I told them this is my challenge and I'll live with it. It's certainly easier now that I'm on "real" food.

I found out at Red Robin you can add a patty onto a burger for $2... so, they order their big gigantic hamburgers with all the stuff and I add a patty on for $2. I'm a cheap date now!

Ginger

You can also get a veggie burger or a turkey burger with a 'lettuce bun'. I like how much you can customize their menu.

Well said!!

<p>As I look around these forums being started some of the most common complaints are "people won't support my decision by bringing healthy foods." Um, not their job to cook healthy for you because you made a life changing decision. Just because they bring the foods they have always brought doesn't mean they are trying to destroy what you are doing, it is just all they know. You can't blame them, be mad at them, or accuse them of being destructive to your diet. You personally HAVE to find a way to deal with this. Everywhere we go there is food. Parties, funerals, celebrations, ANYTHING, there will be unhealthy foods at all of these. </p>

<p> </p>

<p>It's just like this, if I have a party, I provide the food I want. In one party I could have a vegetarian show up, a gluten free person and one who is allergic to dairy. I can't prepare for all of these different kinds of people. If I have something they can eat, great. If I don't, they should have brought their own, or have eaten before they came. It is no different with our new lifestyle. </p>

<p> </p>

<p>This isn't to say that it doesn't suck to watch people eat fried foods, fatty foods, or chocolate cake in front of us, but just because they are doing that doesn't mean they aren't supporting us. They are living their life they way they want. We can't change others, only ourselves. </p>

<p>Have a fantabulous, skinny day! Today is better than yesterday and together we will feel better!</p>

Don't worry so much about what you can and cannot eat. Just have a bite of something that looks really good. Unless you are already full, that will not kill you. I am 14 years post-op now and still , the average American restaurant meal provides me with two additional meals to take home. Also , you can make any great desserts at home using Splenda.