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That is very poignant, Julie, about the sink. I am so sorry for your loss but glad you are finding your way and choosing health -- freedom from food jail makes us all so much stronger.

Happy Friday all! I am going flower shopping for a party I'm hosting tomorrow. Each guest is bringing one bunch of flowers to share and a vase or two to make arrangements to take home. I'm serving tea and there will be goodies. I'm not too tempted by that stuff these days.

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@@Julie norton your my hero! Keep on keeping on cause you inspire me!

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THANK YOU ALL????

I get such nice feedback and advice here. Not many people can discuss some of the topics we touch on here

I feel very safe putting my emotions out to our site. I don't have friends that have had surgery. Harder to explain to the general public

Thankful for understanding and I always appreciate tips for going thru this life banded....

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After a hellish week, I can relax today. I may get a manicure. I've spent the last three weeks working daily on divorce discovery. I took a vacation day Friday in order to meet my deadline. The living room is covered in stacks of papers. Now I just need to box them up and deliver them to the lawyer. I also got my taxes prepared married filing separately and that was completed yesterday. The next deadline is college FAFSA forms, but compared to the past three weeks that's a piece of cake.

My angel daughters each sent me a long distance valentine. One sent a bouquet of flowers. One sent chocolate covered strawberries. I felt very loved and blessed yesterday. I had two berries yesterday and I'll pace the rest at one a day.

I've had a week of okay food choices but more wine than weight loss likes. I'll get on the scale in a few minutes but I'm pretty sure I have a gain this week.

One thing I'm learning is that there is no such thing as taking too good care of yourself. I was truly overwhelmed by the divorce requirements these last three weeks, and I followed a plan to do part of it every single day and to care for myself every single day. That meant a counseling appointment, a foot massage, a lunch with my BFF, a day off work, a movie, some late night TV, some wine. Self care was critical. I also give the results to God every single day.

It's not over, but last night and this morning I finally took a breath and realized I got through a very difficult task and I am strong. I am becoming stronger with every test.

Thanks for being here and always supporting me. It saves my sanity daily.

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After a hellish week, I can relax today. I may get a manicure. I've spent the last three weeks working daily on divorce discovery. I took a vacation day Friday in order to meet my deadline. The living room is covered in stacks of papers. Now I just need to box them up and deliver them to the lawyer. I also got my taxes prepared married filing separately and that was completed yesterday. The next deadline is college FAFSA forms, but compared to the past three weeks that's a piece of cake.

My angel daughters each sent me a long distance valentine. One sent a bouquet of flowers. One sent chocolate covered strawberries. I felt very loved and blessed yesterday. I had two berries yesterday and I'll pace the rest at one a day.

I've had a week of okay food choices but more wine than weight loss likes. I'll get on the scale in a few minutes but I'm pretty sure I have a gain this week.

One thing I'm learning is that there is no such thing as taking too good care of yourself. I was truly overwhelmed by the divorce requirements these last three weeks, and I followed a plan to do part of it every single day and to care for myself every single day. That meant a counseling appointment, a foot massage, a lunch with my BFF, a day off work, a movie, some late night TV, some wine. Self care was critical. I also give the results to God every single day.

It's not over, but last night and this morning I finally took a breath and realized I got through a very difficult task and I am strong. I am becoming stronger with every test.

Thanks for being here and always supporting me. It saves my sanity daily.

It's not about what challenges we face, but how we deal with them and right now, you inspire me with your strength and commitment to your health and well-being.

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Oh Just Watch, wrote a lengthy comment this AM and got booted off the system....Bariatric Pal does not always love my iPad, lol. Just wanted to say, basically, that you are amazing. You broke your huge task down into pieces and got it done. You're bringing mindfulness to your whole life. Small portions. Chewing well. Being finished when you're finished. I have to say, I'm getting so much more out of this whole process than weight loss -- which I love, and needed, but that was my purpose and now the larger purpose, the scope, is just so much more amazing. I like to think my original post this morning was more coherent. I can blame the snow. Good grief, this is something.

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Oh Just Watch, wrote a lengthy comment this AM and got booted off the system....Bariatric Pal does not always love my iPad, lol. Just wanted to say, basically, that you are amazing. You broke your huge task down into pieces and got it done. You're bringing mindfulness to your whole life. Small portions. Chewing well. Being finished when you're finished. I have to say, I'm getting so much more out of this whole process than weight loss -- which I love, and needed, but that was my purpose and now the larger purpose, the scope, is just so much more amazing. I like to think my original post this morning was more coherent. I can blame the snow. Good grief, this is something.

Stay safe and warm. It's bitterly cold here in NYC and I'm sure it's worse in NH.

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. @@Just watch me

One thing at a time. You are doing well.

????Just imagine this time next year will have no negative paperwork and life will go on. There are always mini crisis... But we are strong Moms and can go on and be free of lots of things that held us back for years????

Edited by Julie norton

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Been off of here for a while jusy dealing with life good and bad but key word is dealing with it! Wanted to wish all my wonderful band family a happy Valentine's Day. Because with you and these post the dealing with stuff would be much more difficult. We are all going through something at at the same time it is very similar.

Had friends over for dinner last night and I didn't make the best wasting choices but such is life and I learned something very bad wine makes me able to eat a little more. I don't know if it loosens my band or not but this is not good (well the wine was good lol ).

What I have learned is my band is a food and drink snob. Dislikes non fresh cooked food, and cheap wine. So I have my own eat good device lol.

So over this cold here in Nyc

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Realizing I'm in my danger zone this week. Three weeks of stress is behind me for now and this is where I am in danger of turning to food. The moment I relax. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt.

Today I am aware of this tendency, and today I choose healthy alternatives. Self care is just as important as it was last week. Vigilance, crucial.

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Exercise togs on, shoes laced up and awaiting my workout partner's arrival so we can head to the basement for ninety minutes trading off on treadmill, bike and Bowflex. So many excuses over the last few weeks -- sickness, bitter cold weather, sloth, lol. My body has missed the exercise and I am doing the arms up overhead finish line thing for my fake it til I make it brain response. I want endorphins. I want my back and hip to or feel better. I want the stress release. Ergo I want exercise.

Today eldercare, tax prep and hopefully progress on my two for-pay jobs -- the procrastination is stressing me out. I need a good exercise day and a hyper-productive multi-taskimg family and work kind of day. Going to map out what I need to do for one client today instead of feeling overwhelmed by two. Plus the parents, the kid, the house, the tax paperwork, the photo albums I want to finish, letters I'd like to write, cooking....this is what sends me diving for the covers. Fortunately I know food won't help.

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Day by day people , moment by moment inch by inch just don't forget to take time for you.

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Bandista I hear ya. The thing that got me through the last three weeks was taking it in pieces and remembering self care. I am so encouraged by your description of exercise as that self care. I'm doing minimal exercise now and I need to step it up. I walk stairs at work but it's not the endorphin rush I remember from my single says when I jogged.

One of the benefits of exercise is that it calms the mind. Take care of yourself today, my friend.

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Well I planned to NOT get a fill today but changed my mind after talking to my NP. I gained two pounds since my last visit in December. So I got 0.1 put in again, bringing me to 7.7 in my 14cc band. I watched the fluoro and the barium still went through pretty easily after the fill. I also always take two Tylenol caplets while she does the fluoro to make sure I can still swallow pills. After talking to her I realized I've been getting hungrier earlier between meals. Not by much, but an hour does make a difference. So another tiny fill it is. On liquids now for 48 hours. I also asked about my loosey goosey port. She said it's not loose at all. It's still securely sutured to the muscle. I just have less fat under the skin and the skin is moving around more. Makes sense. Anyway I feel good about the fill and now I'm off to a Zumba class. Exercise, so they tell me, is the key to lasting weight loss. Who knew?

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    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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