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Waiting to begin... Newbie saying hi
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Hello all! I am waiting to get my approval from my insurance company at this point. But I have done my 3 visits with the nutritionist, doppler on my legs, endoscopy, test for h-pylori and my psych eval. Now I wait. And as I wait, a million thoughts / feelings / emotions are rushing through me. Not fear really... because this isn't the first time I've ever had surgery (I had an abdominal myomectomy to remove 14 fibroids from my uterus in 2009 and then a c-section to deliver my daughter in 2011) - so I don't really have a fear of being "put under" or "cut open".
I'm so excited to start my new life. I guess my fear is that they may deny me and then I'll have to figure out what i'm really doing. For 20 years I've watched this weight just pile on and no matter what I've done - it's determined to stay there. And as I Celebrate my 40th birthday in October - I want to be free of that struggle. But I recognize me and my will power. I need something to force me into place. When I was pregnant with my daughter, I lost so much more weight than I gained because I dodged every and anything they told me was bad for her... because of the consequences to her. I feel like I've heard enough horror stories about what happens when you don't follow the plan after the lap band that it would be enough to hold me true to the system.
My mom died at 65 years old in 2008 because of Metabolic Syndrome. She struggled with her weight all of MY natural life. They've already started using words around me like "pre-diabetic" and "high blood pressure" I cannot. I will not follow that path. I have a 3 year old daughter who needs me to do better and live longer. But i have to stop kidding myself with all these other methods I've been using.
So this is my hello... hopefully in the coming days, I'll report great things about what is on the horizon for me.
Thank you for welcoming me into your community!