Men, does a woman's loose skin affect you at intimate times?

[JustMeJFD 32]

Well of course your husband's won't say anything! They aren't stupid! Lol.

As a single woman myself I do worry about this too. Finally get the weight off but still ashamed of the naked time.

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,282]

@@Dr-Patient my husband always tells me the skin does not bother him at all, and he proves it. For the most part my skin issues are in my head. I do plan to have my skin removed someday.

ETA: for me personally some loose skin would be okay on my husband. But if he had a large amount of it from say, losing maybe 200+ Lbs I can see it being a turn off for me. My hubby is an attractive guy and admittedly is what attracted me to him initially. He is a bit overweight by maybe 30 Lbs now as he's losing some weight himself, I doubt he will have little or any skin to worry over.

Edited April 24, 2014 by LilmissDiva Irene

[skinnygirlwithin 693]

great question! i am down over 70lbs in 4 months and i worry about my skin, but my husband assures me that its not as bad as i think it is. He is loving the new me & how my body is transforming... i have another 30lbs to go, and i worry about my skin...

[gourmetone 394]

Great topic, I think it bothers me the most down 73 pounds. But we have FUN when I get to twerking and have so much more giggle in my wiggle!

[erp 2,016]

My DH misses the boobs other than that I don't think he cares. I dislike the loose skin more than he does.

[Andrew0929 1,102]

It's not a problem for me, but once I take my glasses off I can't see the difference anyway.

[CowgirlJane 14,261]

Well, I somewhat unwittingly conducted an experiment. A few months after getting to goal I started seeing someone who has always been super fit/athlete type. We didn't discuss it much, but he was not someone who dated or was attracted to plus size women. Well, I warned him about the skin as I was very paranoid I guess and in truth I still felt kinda fat (mostly due to the extra skin, but I was also about 15-18 pounds heavier than I am now). He told me later that I made way too big of a deal out of the loose skin - that the reality was not THAT bad.

Down the road, I decided to do plastics which he was basically against (although not actively trying to talk me out of it, just thought it wasn't really needed). Then, when I had the plastics, he was like WOW.

So, I think my experiment proves PDX point - pretty happy just to get you nekkid and it's all a bonus from there.

Women worry way way too much about this crap. I once saw a funny on Facebook that said:

"women will never attain true equality with men until they can walk down the street bald and with a big beer belly and actually think they are hot stuff"

[Dr-Patient 831]

Well, ... pretty happy just to get you nekkid and it's all a bonus from there.

Women worry way way too much about this

I agree that we do. In fact, when I give my "informative hoot!!!" lecture to women about sex, I tell them that very thing. Things we women worry about, most men don't even care.

Funny story I tell them: When I dated this nice guy (GREAT lover!!!!! Boy, did we have fun/great sex), sometimes I'd lie on my right side, my head on his left thigh. He loved to rub his left hand fingers under my muffin top (fold) from the left side. When doing that, I'm thinking, Oh God. Why is he doing that!? The fat! Eeew. Yuck, etc. Saying nothing, I'd s-l-o-w-l-y move his hand away, rest it on my left hip. A mintue/two later, his hand is back in that spot, under my roll of fat! I'd slowly move it again. Then, one time he said, "Will you leave my hand alone; I like rubbing right there!"

I was the one tripping about the fat, not him. Even though I think he thought if he rubbed there enough, he'd find another va-jay-jay to enter. LOL.

[Recycled 2,182]

Actually I doubt there is a way to really get an accurate and truthful evaluation of these type of questions. People just won't be honest. There is no upside to answering with a negative response. Everybody lies in the interest of being nice or just not hurting someone's feelings. (Thankfully no one can read minds) Even it they think they don't care about appearances, circumstances will dictate the answers most times. More so than verbalized ideals. In one given situation it might not matter and would be overlooked and yet with alternative choices in another circumstance it might be a deal breaker. Even attempting to point this out will probably get me flamed.....so it's just better to keep silent.

We are a visual species.....Put a hot looking tight skinned body next to a attractive but excessive loose skinned one and it's a no brainer. The question really doesn't need to be asked.

And regardless of that line of "I love you no matter how you look" . I'm not naive. I hate how the extra skin looks on me and if and when I can afford it, I'm ditching it pronto.

Ok, I have my flame retardant suit on now.......fire away.

Edited April 26, 2014 by Recycled

[LANDSCAPER 41 1]

Fellas, please advise: Does a woman's loose skin distract, annoy, or repulse you in intimate times; or are you so focused on 'other stuff', it really doesn't matter? I've lost ~55 pounds and still want to lost another 30-40 pounds. I do see some loose skin, though it's not bad at this point. It's not a current matter for me--the "what is he thinking (because I need to find me a new 'he'")--but I'm thinking to maybe see an old friend who's been begging me for years. LOL. (and we do have a 22-year crush/attraction to each other). And, ladies, have the men you're dating voiced, or seemed to have any concern about this? What's been your experience with this? Granted, those I ask who are here on BP understand, but give your best thoughts on this matter. I don't think I need to really worry about it, but just curious if this is a turn-off (especially if the guy doesn't know of the WLS). Thanks to all respondents.

I don't think thats a problem at all. I wonder it for myself. I've been married for 5 years and my wife says she loves me no matter how I look. I love her for that and she's crazy HOT!! So ladies remember this. As long as you take your newly shaped bodies and flaunt them. Use your new CONFIDENCE to let the men in your life want

you! Working out doing moving exercises help tighten things up. I'm having surgery on the May 13. I hope to get healthier for myself first of all and my family!! Keep up the great conversations!!

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,282]

No flaming here, I agree with you 100%.

Actually I doubt there is a way to really get an accurate and truthful evaluation of these type of questions. People just won't be honest. There is no upside to answering with a negative response. Everybody lies in the interest of being nice or just not hurting someone's feelings. (Thankfully no one can read minds) Even it they think they don't care about appearances, circumstances will dictate the answers most times. More so than verbalized ideals. In one given situation it might not matter and would be overlooked and yet with alternative choices in another circumstance it might be a deal breaker. Even attempting to point this out will probably get me flamed.....so it's just better to keep silent.

We are a visual species.....Put a hot looking tight skinned body next to a attractive but excessive loose skinned one and it's a no brainer. The question really doesn't need to be asked.

And regardless of that line of "I love you no matter how you look" . I'm not naive. I hate how the extra skin looks on me and if and when I can afford it, I'm ditching it pronto.

Ok, I have my flame retardant suit on now.......fire away.

[CowgirlJane 14,261]

No flames here... but... trust me there are plenty of people who are repulsed by the scars from plastic surgery too. I know this because a lady in my plastics support group has been TOLD that directly.

I say screw em - I lost weight and had plastics for ME. I look good clothed and while I am far from perfect naked, I know I look better than many other women my age.

My guyfriend said something interesting. He said that in the dating world, regardless of extra skin or plastics scars - about 20% will be attracted; another 20% will be not attracted to you and the rest...eh.. somewhere in the middle and could go either way. You never know, maybe they are more bothered by my beauty mark (mole) on my left jaw. Who cares - I like me and I am who I am.... there are some things I can't change or fix so I will simply not worry about it. I am confident in myself and deserve to find someone who is comfortable with/accepting of and hopefully even attracted to the whole package - quite literally, scars and all.

Actually I doubt there is a way to really get an accurate and truthful evaluation of these type of questions. People just won't be honest. There is no upside to answering with a negative response. Everybody lies in the interest of being nice or just not hurting someone's feelings. (Thankfully no one can read minds) Even it they think they don't care about appearances, circumstances will dictate the answers most times. More so than verbalized ideals. In one given situation it might not matter and would be overlooked and yet with alternative choices in another circumstance it might be a deal breaker. Even attempting to point this out will probably get me flamed.....so it's just better to keep silent.

We are a visual species.....Put a hot looking tight skinned body next to a attractive but excessive loose skinned one and it's a no brainer. The question really doesn't need to be asked.

And regardless of that line of "I love you no matter how you look" . I'm not naive. I hate how the extra skin looks on me and if and when I can afford it, I'm ditching it pronto.

Ok, I have my flame retardant suit on now.......fire away.

[teshadb 203]

I agree that we do. In fact, when I give my "informative hoot!!!" lecture to women about sex, I tell them that very thing. Things we women worry about, most men don't even care. Funny story I tell them: When I dated this nice guy (GREAT lover!!!!! Boy, did we have fun/great sex), sometimes I'd lie on my right side, my head on his left thigh. He loved to rub his left hand fingers under my muffin top (fold) from the left side. When doing that, I'm thinking, Oh God. Why is he doing that!? The fat! Eeew. Yuck, etc. Saying nothing, I'd s-l-o-w-l-y move his hand away, rest it on my left hip. A mintue/two later, his hand is back in that spot, under my roll of fat! I'd slowly move it again. Then, one time he said, "Will you leave my hand alone; I like rubbing right there!" I was the one tripping about the fat, not him. Even though I think he thought if he rubbed there enough, he'd find another va-jay-jay to enter. LOL.

Hahahaha omg dying that's so great! I would be thinking the same thing you were !!!!! Lol

[CowgirlJane 14,261]

I love it when an old thread is revived. My current perspective versus 4 months ago.

I am in the dating world so have some recent experience with how weight/looks impact perceptions. So maybe every guy fantasizes about the swimsuit model and every woman dreams of a man with a full head of hair...on his head..Haha.. but we dont always get what we want. And if you got it, wouldn't you wonder if he/she considered themselves in a separate league? Isn't it better to find a person you want to roll around with..imperfections and all? A person who is equally mad about you?

Actually I doubt there is a way to really get an accurate and truthful evaluation of these type of questions. People just won't be honest. There is no upside to answering with a negative response. Everybody lies in the interest of being nice or just not hurting someone's feelings. (Thankfully no one can read minds) Even it they think they don't care about appearances, circumstances will dictate the answers most times. More so than verbalized ideals. In one given situation it might not matter and would be overlooked and yet with alternative choices in another circumstance it might be a deal breaker. Even attempting to point this out will probably get me flamed.....so it's just better to keep silent.

We are a visual species.....Put a hot looking tight skinned body next to a attractive but excessive loose skinned one and it's a no brainer. The question really doesn't need to be asked.

And regardless of that line of "I love you no matter how you look" . I'm not naive. I hate how the extra skin looks on me and if and when I can afford it, I'm ditching it pronto.

Ok, I have my flame retardant suit on now.......fire away.

[gottagonow 82]

It hasn't bothered my husband of 3 years. I have lost over 100 lbs on a 5-5 frame. Its all in my gut and legs.

HE LOVES that he can do Oral on me and he can breathe now.

So no men don't care just enjoy the sex.

I nearly fell off the couch - love that comment! And so didn't see it coming.