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Stop the Whining Over A Few Miserable Days!



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The sun is shining in Florida again, and I hope it is peeking out wherever you all are. I think a good dose of summer will help all of us regroup , put a spring in our step, and get off the rants awhile and get outdoors! I can hardly wait!! I for one feel like a new person. Keep up the good work and let's lose more weight!

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So,here is what I understand from your rant.

1. Your sleeve was only a month ago

2. You felt prepared and confidant going in.

3. Pain management has been poor, and people need to speak up.

4. You called for your own re-enforcements to have an advocate on your side

5. Your hope for newbies is that they prepare themselves for a rough road that will mellow out after a while.

My note for newbies who are reading this: People on this forum have their own unique way of expressing themselves. Some are meek, some are bold, and most are in the middle. I would encourage forum members to go ahead and ask your questions. Advice will vary based on how a person was brought up. We all can't be strong on the same day, so take what you can out of each response and use it to build up courage.

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I also knew getting big and fat was bad. Did lots of research, lots of diets. Still got big and fat. I have feelings and regrets about that. Just because you have regrets doesn't mean you weren't well informed.

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I know people who were nauseous for two days and then basically no problems, no regrets...but if someone is real sick and not feeling like they are progressing, they would like some support. I'm sure they researched like most everyone else, but unless YOU are the one going through it, it seems less important. Let's try to be supportive of each other.

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boxers too pull those suckers up! Funny this is a social website and you are in the rant and rave section...some will support by coddling some such as myself will be straight forward....everyone's different. If my way don t work please by all means remove me from your Christmas card list...lol :)

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So,here is what I understand from your rant. 1. Your sleeve was only a month ago 2. You felt prepared and confidant going in. 3. Pain management has been poor, and people need to speak up. 4. You called for your own re-enforcements to have an advocate on your side 5. Your hope for newbies is that they prepare themselves for a rough road that will mellow out after a while. My note for newbies who are reading this: People on this forum have their own unique way of expressing themselves. Some are meek, some are bold, and most are in the middle. I would encourage forum members to go ahead and ask your questions. Advice will vary based on how a person was brought up. We all can't be strong on the same day, so take what you can out of each response and use it to build up courage.

My sleeve may have only been a month ago but it's during that period of time most declare their regrets.

My pain management was poor during one nursing shift. It's complicated but it was a retaliation because my sister complained about the nurses not doing their job. Her opinion. She is very outspoken. I did speak up for myself and it got fixed but I tell my sisters everything. It didn't matter what got solved my sister still came up there. I'm very lucky in my support system.

As an observer I really hope those that haven't had surgery yet read these posts. Know and understand how common nausea, vomiting, difficulty getting in liquids etc will be for many. I'm sure that they didn't make the decision to have WLS lightly therefore shouldn't be so quick to think it was a mistake after a few setbacks.

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To The Old Me Again, I think everyone needs, and has a right to vent, regardless of all the research, it doesn't put it into the true perspective, as having it done. I was, I thought prepared for my father to pass, after many yrs of living in pain, and thought I could handle it, until the day it happened. This forum is very good for those who are doing well, as for those who aren't doing well, We all need someone to vent to, and many on here may have nobody. I actually was supposed to have this done a year ago, and researched for 2 yrs, but I can honestly tell you all the research in the world didn't prepare me for the pain I had when I came out from recovery. I am not heavy, I had a hernia that couldn't be repaired because of infection, my bowels, and intestines split my stomach lining, split my stomach muscle in half, and have been growing, and growing since 2006. My arms , and legs, are like twigs, it's only my abdomen. So I had to have the surgery, so that a year from now they can open me up, and put everything into a nice mesh bag, and there will be room. so you see, everyone's journey is different. Have a little empathy, that's why we're all on here to SUPPORT one another. Good luck on your journey!

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Hmmm ... wow. Please come back to this thread when you are a year out.

Why?! Because someone so soon out of surgery can't possible know about regrets? I don't believe in them. I may be early out therefore not in the clear yet but even if I get a leak or some other complication I'll deal with it.

In a year you will see this thread again and I will ask... You were saying?

I don't know you and I think your attitude is wonderful for now. I am one of those that paid big time for this and still have complications after 17 months..

I wish this on no one, ever. You may think that you have it all sewed up because you are handling things right now, but you don't say that you will just deal with it...I worked my ass off for this sleeve and almost died for it. But I would never make the statement that I would just deal with whatever comes. To be honest. You don't know what will come or what won't because it is your trip, no one else.

I think if someone feels pain they have a right to say if they need to. some just need to say it and hear it is okay. No one ever thinks that it will be them that has the real difficulties.

I rolled the dice and won the lottery of 14 surgeries, coma and a hell of a lot more. Rant all you want. But for me I Celebrate the easy victories everyone has because no one is really ready for the opposite. not even you hun!

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its her opinion I think its a more of stop whining type of thing which I totally get

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I don't know you and I think your attitude is wonderful for now. I am one of those that paid big time for this and still have complications after 17 months.. I wish this on no one, ever. You may think that you have it all sewed up because you are handling things right now, but you don't say that you will just deal with it...I worked my ass off for this sleeve and almost died for it. But I would never make the statement that I would just deal with whatever comes. To be honest. You don't know what will come or what won't because it is your trip, no one else. I think if someone feels pain they have a right to say if they need to. some just need to say it and hear it is okay. No one ever thinks that it will be them that has the real difficulties. I rolled the dice and won the lottery of 14 surgeries, coma and a hell of a lot more. Rant all you want. But for me I Celebrate the easy victories everyone has because no one is really ready for the opposite. not even you hun!

That's great you survived your hardships. As you said you don't know me. I know from past experiences I can get past anything. I had to fight tooth and nail to get cleared psychologically because of some of the things I experienced while deployed. But I overcame and proved one psych doc wrong and here I am. Doing better than those that got approved right away. Your blues are not mine but I don't throw a pity party. I tell myself that is the past and it will not hinder me. It's what I do next that defines me. So yes I can rant about whiners. It's my right to in this thread. This is the Perfect Place.

I don't think some comprehend what I said or that just read whine and get offended. If your going to rant & rave, whine, do it, whatever make you feel better. My POINT is that REGRETTING surgery over a few Expected Temporary symptoms is unnecessary whining. That is bit much. Maybe they weren't really ready for this Serious surgery.

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So because YOU don't believe in regrets, people aren't allowed to have them? INTERESTING!! ;)

Nope, where I say that? That comment was in reasons to a poster saying come back in a year implying I might feel or think differently. I was letting him know I won't.

People can have regrets all that want. But if they having them over a some nausea and pain then I wonder if they were really ready for WLS or at least researched it well enough.

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its her opinion I think its a more of stop whining type of thing which I totally get

Yea they don't want to get get it. It offends their sensibilities that someone not a "vet" dare give such an opinion. This is a major surgery. It's one thing to talk about what your going through but the whining to the point of regret? I'm going to keep on saying it.... Maybe they weren't prepared enough.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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