When I met my husband I was curvy, he says it's what he was attracted to at first sight. I noticed that he really hadn't been saying a whole lot about how I looked now and I thought it was strange but didn't give much thought. When I told him that reached 70 lbs lost, again, not much was said. So I pressed him for his thoughts.

Now that I'm a baggy size 9 and feeling healthy he tells me I'm too thin and he would like me to put on 20 lbs. um what? For one, it's not possible to gain weight given the small amounts I'm restricted to eat. And two, why would I want to? I'm mere pounds from my goal weight and the size I was before children. I just can't do it, he'll have accept me the size I am.

Patty I can totally relate... When I met my husband I was about a size 16. He thought I was soo sexy then and he likes bigger women!! Now I might wear a size 4 soaking wet! While he has never told me he finds me unattractive I have lost all the assets he loved most about my body. My once size DD breast now look like small shriveled raisins that are probably a C cup and my rear that was soo perky and huge is flat and saggy.. There is nothing attractive about my body anymore!!! But, never once has he told me anything but how much he loves me and that I'm still beautiful to him... Although I don't totally believe that I can't say much in retort because at least he is trying to make me feel good... He knows there isn't anything I can do about my weightloss or my figure. I think in some ways it's hard for our spouses to go through the process as well because maybe they weren't aware things would change soo much.

That's one thing I worry about like will I like the way I look once I'm smaller, I know my hubby will be use he is a trainer so he wants this for me more than I do! But theirs that question still in the back of my head!

Even though this is ones own personal journey if you are married or have children this is going to change their lives also, as we move thru this process we are so focused on ourselves (nothing wrong with that) that we tend to not realize that this will effect your relationships around you. The ones closest to you love you and support you but who supports them? Some marriages dont survive this, some get stronger.. we can only be true to ourselves, but dont forget them in the process

I worry, too, and have insecurities. I was once a very fit person, and I want my body to look the way it did 20 years ago...lol, not realistic! My husband says he's fine with my body just as he was fine when I was fat. He loves me, and I realize it's my insecurity that drives me crazy.

At the end of the day there is nothing I can do about how he feels. He just needs to put on his big boy pants and suck it up. The surgery literally saved my life. I had out of control diabetes and now my glucose levels are normal, if I gain weight I run the risk of the levels rising again and that's just not an option.

Even though this is ones own personal journey if you are married or have children this is going to change their lives also, as we move thru this process we are so focused on ourselves (nothing wrong with that) that we tend to not realize that this will effect your relationships around you. The ones closest to you love you and support you but who supports them? Some marriages dont survive this, some get stronger.. we can only be true to ourselves, but dont forget them in the process

WE support them. A good program also supports them. Mine allows family members to be a part of the education process pre-op. My support group allows family to attend and participate every third month post-op. I share all my information w/my hubby. He asks when he has questions. We are a team. Without him it would be harder to be successful, and maintain the success I've had so far. :-)