Man on the brink of surgery

Exude · March 14, 2007

I went to my first required lap band class today. I came away sort of down. It is really strange as I was driving there I was totally up for it but after the 1.5 hours I came away wondering if I should go through with the surgery. Funny thing is, I didn't hear anything I haven't read or heard before. I left down because I have the feeling of "why can't i do this on my own?" and "if i am required to walk 1hr a day post op to lose weight, what would be the difference if i were to walk 1 hr a day now" I am also worried about support from my wife, she doesnt understand what it is like to be big, and when i have tried dieting in the past, she continues on doing the things she does and eventually I fall off the wagon and gain back all the weight. Are these feelings normal or am I really not ready.

For one, I want you to know that you are not the only one that went through those exact feelings. All the way until the day of surgery I asked myself... should I do this? I lost 23 lbs. in 1.5 months before surgery. My reason for getting the surgery was because I've dieted tons and tons before but could never lose weight anymore. I lost 80 lbs. three years ago, but have been battling losing weight again ever since. I would do the same things that I had lost all the weight before and could not lose a lb., only slow the progression of my body weight going into the 320's again.

When I lost 23 lbs. in the past 1.5 months, I was shocked! If I couuuld do it now, then what the hell am I getting bariatric surgery at 23 for?! I have so much beer, pizza, steak, and BUFFALO wings to eat with all my college buds. My simple answer: I have a disease. Obesity is something that certain people will suffer from... forever. The surgery does not cure the disease, but it will suppress it successfully (with hard work). Me losing 23 lbs. showed that I am ready to put my mind to it and suppress this disease overtaking my life. I lost so much since I gained my weight back... I had a great active life, a loving girlfriend, and my schoolwork/friendships all balanced out. Since feeling my weight has been uncontrollable, other aspects of my life started going out of control.

If you're still having doubts... don't go for it. But I strongly encourage you to take a piece of paper out and write out why you need to lose weight. Do you have a strong family history of disease? Do you love food so much and can't give it up? Do you not have the support you need? Personally, I am worried about your wife understanding your situation. You may have to explain to her that weight loss on your own is not successful. 95% of those who go on diets gain the weight back + more. The band is only a TOOL to aid in weight loss so you don't fall within that 95% statistic.

We're all here to encourage you through the process whether you go through with it or not. But know we all have been or are going through the same thing. We all were/are big at one point. Good luck.

-Jason

marjon9 · March 14, 2007

All that stuff is normal. Most people who have the lap band say to themselves at one point "why don't I just diet and exercise and do it myself. They say the lap band is just a tool and you have to do the work. So why not just do the work without the band?" Most of us have gone through that. But the fact is, it's almost impossible in this society to lose major weight through diet and exercise. There is virtually zero chance you are going to do it alone, just like all the rest of us. That's just the harsh reality.

With the band you still have to work, and watch what you eat, but the band gives enough of a boost to make major weight loss actually possible. It's that helping hand that makes all the difference and helps put you over the top.

Think about it for a while if you want to. At your age you can afford to do that. But at some point you will realize, like we all have, that this is probably the only real chance we have to deal with major obesity.

In the meantime don't be down on yourself for having doubts and raising questions. That is totally normal. You are going about the process just right.

Exude · March 14, 2007

All that stuff is normal. Most people who have the lap band say to themselves at one point "why don't I just diet and exercise and do it myself. They say the lap band is just a tool and you have to do the work. So why not just do the work without the band?" Most of us have gone through that. But the fact is, it's almost impossible in this society to lose major weight through diet and exercise. There is virtually zero chance you are going to do it alone, just like all the rest of us. That's just the harsh reality.
With the band you still have to work, and watch what you eat, but the band gives enough of a boost to make major weight loss actually possible. It's that helping hand that makes all the difference and helps put you over the top.

Think about it for a while if you want to. At your age you can afford to do that. But at some point you will realize, like we all have, that this is probably the only real chance we have to deal with major obesity.

In the meantime don't be down on yourself for having doubts and raising questions. That is totally normal. You are going about the process just right.

I also want to mention that another large reason for me to get this surgery was that the LAP-BAND is completely reversible. With all the medical research going on with obesity and all the scientific advances in medicine... we may soon find the "magic pill." At 23, I'm counting within 10 years that we will exponentially increase obesity research and find the right way to control weight. That mayyy be a new surgery (I've heard of the gastric pacemaker in research), or just a pill... the band gives you that option to take it off if need be.

-Jason

juliegeraci · March 14, 2007

I know how you feel. I have to be truthful with you though about the exercise. I haven't done any since I was banded and I'm a slow loser losing 45 lbs since June. They want you to exercise to speed things up but if you don't you will still have some good results. Hang in there.

Gaffer · March 14, 2007

I went to my first required lap band class today. I came away sort of down. It is really strange as I was driving there I was totally up for it but after the 1.5 hours I came away wondering if I should go through with the surgery. Funny thing is, I didn't hear anything I haven't read or heard before. I left down because I have the feeling of "why can't i do this on my own?" and "if i am required to walk 1hr a day post op to lose weight, what would be the difference if i were to walk 1 hr a day now" I am also worried about support from my wife, she doesnt understand what it is like to be big, and when i have tried dieting in the past, she continues on doing the things she does and eventually I fall off the wagon and gain back all the weight. Are these feelings normal or am I really not ready.

I think what you are going through is totally normal. I had doubts up to the minute they put the IV in may arm. I lost 30lb through the preop diet and thought "Okay I will just do this for another 12 weeks and I will be fine". In the back of my head I always knew that I could not do it, and that medical intervention in the form of the band was the only way I was going to make a permenant change.

If your wife is not supportive make sure she knows that you are doing it for the right reasons, like your health and longevity. I dont think any one who loves you can fault you for those reasons. I can't imagine having a wife who is not supportive as mine has been there for me through the whole thing, but I think it is something that you would have to work out before going through with it.

I can honestly say that now that I have the band, and the pounds are coming off, it is nice to know that those pounds are gone for could barring any major problems or foul ups on my behalf.

Andrew

bigsexy · March 15, 2007

All - I have some more questions about peoples weight loss trackers. All across this message board there are drastic weightlosses in very little time. I know that results may vary per person but Andrew 45lbs in 4 weeks is astonishing!!!! Congratulations. Others I have seen who were recently banded have lost a lot of weight too. Some have not. My surgeon says most of the patients he treats dont loose much weight in the first six weeks until their initial fill and then after that it is 1-2 lbs a week. My surgeon also says he does not and will not put any sailene in the band during the sugery. Can anyone shed some light to why this is the case and why there are such drastic weight losses when I've been told only to expect 1-2lbs a week?

Exude · March 15, 2007

All - I have some more questions about peoples weight loss trackers. All across this message board there are drastic weightlosses in very little time. I know that results may vary per person but Andrew 45lbs in 4 weeks is astonishing!!!! Congratulations. Others I have seen who were recently banded have lost a lot of weight too. Some have not. My surgeon says most of the patients he treats dont loose much weight in the first six weeks until their initial fill and then after that it is 1-2 lbs a week. My surgeon also says he does not and will not put any sailene in the band during the sugery. Can anyone shed some light to why this is the case and why there are such drastic weight losses when I've been told only to expect 1-2lbs a week?

Your surgeon is right. You should expect 1-2 lbs. a week after you get the band. And he doesn't fill it at the time of surgery, nor until 6 weeks later. Your body needs to heal with the band placement and a fill will prevent that from happening. You will also lose weight within that 6 weeks and the fill will help secure a better fit when you need it.

I've lost 30 lbs. (7 lbs. post-op). As you can see, 23 lbs. was from PRE-op... for in a total of only about 1.5 months. This is coming from the guy who could not lose a lb. for the life of him, hence getting the surgery. I had lost 80 lbs. three years ago and gained it all back plus some... never able to lose it again. I couldn't believe that following the liquid diet and really focusing on the surgery (as well as scare tactics, I did not want to get the bypass!) could help me lose weight. So there ya go... follow the pre-op diet, make some dietary changes immediately, and before surgery, you should lose a lot of weight!

-Jason

marjon9 · March 15, 2007

All - I have some more questions about peoples weight loss trackers. All across this message board there are drastic weightlosses in very little time. I know that results may vary per person but Andrew 45lbs in 4 weeks is astonishing!!!! Congratulations. Others I have seen who were recently banded have lost a lot of weight too. Some have not. My surgeon says most of the patients he treats dont loose much weight in the first six weeks until their initial fill and then after that it is 1-2 lbs a week. My surgeon also says he does not and will not put any sailene in the band during the sugery. Can anyone shed some light to why this is the case and why there are such drastic weight losses when I've been told only to expect 1-2lbs a week?

The thing about that band that can be frustrating is that results vary so much from person to person. Not only results, but other things as well. Some people are ready to go back to work the day after surgery. Some people need two weeks. Some people find that their surgery incisions heal in days, others take weeks. Some people can't eat steak or chicken, others had no problem, etc. etc.

As for weight loss results, the answer is the same here too, each person is different. There is just no other answer to your question. Some of this is based on the actions of the person (do they stay on the bandster program or do they eat chips and ice cream; do they exercise or not). But some of it is just different for people who act the same way in relation to their band. Some people who eat right lose slowly, others who eat right lose quickly.

So, try not to get hung up on the results one person has over another. All you can do is focus on yourself and do the best you can.

Also, keep in mind that if your doctor's predictions are correct, you will have fabulous results over the next year. Even if you only lose a pound a week, that's 100 pounds in two years. How likely is it that you would do that without the band? If you did that from diet and exercise, everyone would think you were the miracle kid. And with the band, it is likely to stay off. And the band is reversible, and relatively complication-free compared to bypass.

So, all you can do is just do the best you can, think long term, and try not to worry about other people's results. Everyone is different with the band.

Gaffer · March 15, 2007

I know that results may vary per person but Andrew 45lbs in 4 weeks is astonishing!!!! Congratulations.

Just to clarify, my 45lbs does include my pre-op diet weight loss. I was put on a 3 week Optifast diet, which is <1000 calories per day, with high protien to promote ketosis. My surgeon required this as I have a high BMI and they wanted to shrink my liver. Some surgeons don't require a pre-op diet, but I think they are a good idea if for nothing else to break you of those bad habits, and so that you arent going through carb withdrawl right after surgery.

I lost about 30lbs in the 3 weeks of my pre-op, and I have lost the other 15lbs since I had the surgery which was a month ago yesterday. I have not had any fills yet, but I think that I will be on target to lose 50lbs before my first fill. I consider myself to be lucky to lose this much weight since Jan. 24. I was very diligent with my pre-op and post-op diets, and now I am working out 4 days a week which helps.

There are times where I think I could have done this without the band, but really deep down I know that it would not be a permenant change. I have lost 50-125lbs in multiple attempts only to gain it back plus interest.

This is the first time that I am not thinking in the back of my head "how much will I gain back when I fall off the wagon"

1-2 pounds per week is considered the "safe" route for weight loss, and that is an average. As a man, it is pretty likely that your weight loss will be greater when you first start out. I think many Dr.s use the 1-2lbs per week to try and manage the expectations of thier patients. When you think about it if you average 2lbs per week for a year that would be 110lbs per year. Would you be happy to be 110lbs lighter in a year?

Andrew

Exude · March 15, 2007

This is the first time that I am not thinking in the back of my head "how much will I gain back when I fall off the wagon"

Andrew

EXACTLY!

-Jason

wish412 · March 15, 2007

here is my input on the subject: My husband has been large all of our married life(30 years so far), and has always struggled to lose weight, only to gain it back, plus some. When he retired from his job as a fire fighter, he weighed 357lbs. Can you even imagine rescuing someone on a ladder at that weight!! As we watched our youngest son enter college and play college baseball weighing 320 lbs there was such a sense of guilt over not teaching him better habits. So the two guys pledged to do the Subway thing, and son lost down to 199 lbs. and husband lost 150 lbs total. Soon afterwards, husband had a heart attack, and needed a stent put in. And guess what, all the weight came right back on!! He blamed it on the meds that slowed his heart rate, but I watched him eat his way back up to 330 lbs. After the son graduated from college after 5 years of baseball, he is also almost back to his precollege weight.

Now to the good part of all this,,,, after I had lapband surgery to shed my excess weight(mainly for vanities sake, since I had no real health problems to blame it on) my husband watched quietly as the pounds fell off, without hardly any exercise to speak of, and no changes to his love of eating out all the time. So six months later he signed up for the surgery!!! He was so impressed with how it all worked, and he was bandes on Jan. 31, 2007. To dATE HE HAS LOST ALMOST 50 LBS, with not really much effort, and only a walking schedule for exercise. The thing he loves the most is that without any problems, he can be sure of the weight not coming right back like it always has. He will always have his safety net against weight gain to help him. He is almost 50 years old, and for the first time in his life he feels safe against the obesity demon that controlled his entire life. What a blessing the surgery has been for both of us, hopefully it will work out for others as well as it has for us. MIZBOO

juliegeraci · March 15, 2007

Bigsexy, you can expect 1-2 lbs a week. Some people do lose a little faster. In my case I am at 1.5 lbs per week. Good luck.

waterlily1072 · March 15, 2007

Excresise is good for you yes, and it will help you to lose faster, that said...

I know of several banded people who did not excersise through the entire losing process and they hit goal! While we should all get out and walk everyday the overall success of your weightloss is not hanging in the balance, it's merely calories in vs calories burned, pure and simple. About carbonation, I found that I could drink carbonation just fine until I had really good restriction, and now I can't, but everyone is different. I can eat crispy/thin crust pizza but it is uncomfortable for me so I don't anymore, I can eat a tender steak but I have to chew so long that I quickly lose interest so I rarely bother, and I used to LOVE it. I honestly don't have much of a tate for food anymore, it has become a sorce of fuel for my body.