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December 2013 Sleevers Come In!

AtlantaRed

By AtlantaRed, in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums

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WombatVSG    56

WombatVSG
Posted

I know this is totally off topic but I have to vent. I'm not very close with my dad, he lives in Chicago and I live in Manitoba Canada. He's coming for a visit this evening and staying at my house for a week. (Never buy a house with extra guest bedrooms!!!!)

...

Does anyone else have difficulty telling family members about their sleeve??

Hate to say it, but my standby is, "I'd rather be fat than unkind to people I love, but I'm trying to change... maybe you should try changing too?" And if he's still crappy about it (or anything), you need to ask him what kind of future relationship he wants to have with you, because the path he's treading is neither useful nor loving.

Hope the weekend goes well, and hugs.

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AtlantaRed    651

AtlantaRed
Posted

I wouldnt tell him. Its not unheard if to lose 30 pounds. If necessary I would say something like "it's amazing what you can do when you surround yourself with a positive support system who all want to help me become healthier!".

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BestYet2Come    97

BestYet2Come
Posted

I know this is totally off topic but I have to vent. I'm not very close with my dad, he lives in Chicago and I live in Manitoba Canada. He's coming for a visit this evening and staying at my house for a week. (Never buy a house with extra guest bedrooms!!!!)

My mom promised me she would come over to help me talk to my dad about the gastric sleeve as he has no idea. I was sleeved on December 9th and down 36lbs, so at this point it's fairly obvious. My dad is not a sensitive man, he's called me fat my whole life and laughed when others have called me fat. I'm really nervous to even eat in front of him and now I have to go through telling him about my surgery.

My parents have been divorced for 14 years but they're still friends and see and talk to each other often. When my dad is mean to me my mom will stick up for me (sometimes). I talked to her this morning and she said she'd be over by 3. Well it's now 4, my dad should be here any minute and she's not here. Not answering her phone and I've texted her several times.

I know I'm 30 and should just suck it up and put my big girl pants on (that are getting smaller these days!!) but it's really hard facing my dad alone. Worse yet, my sister who is fairly supportive of me is out of town. So it is literally just me, that's a lie... I have my wonderful husband and three amazing children who love me for me. :o)

Does anyone else have difficulty telling family members about their sleeve??

Fostermama, you were just given the gift of a brand new life, be grateful and use it wisely. The universe (or higher power) will handle your father as he deserves in due course. Don't get yourself tangled in the past, keep your eye on the amazing future ahead. Stay strong and don't let the anxiety of his visit bring you down, or emotionally eat. Be the better person, treat him well, and don't let anything he says bring you down. And yes, tell him it was diet and exercise, which is not untrue. Good luck, we are here for you!

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fostermama    63

fostermama
Posted

Thanks for the great advice guys!! I decided not to say anything and I'm glad! He didn't comment and I didn't offer. My mom ended up coming over which is awesome. He did eye my plate and portion of food but didn't say anything.

I am definitely getting stronger. I was always scared to talk in groups of people and finding it easier to converse with my son's hockey team parents and my daughter's dance parents as well. Also I'm in University and answered my first question in a class of 75 last week. Feels good to be confident! :)

Thanks everyone for the support. I can't believe I didn't think of not telling him, like that was even an option! Ha! :)

cabstewart, carson's mom, WombatVSG and 6 others reacted to this

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DeezJeanz    1,065

DeezJeanz
Posted

Thanks for the great advice guys!! I decided not to say anything and I'm glad! He didn't comment and I didn't offer. My mom ended up coming over which is awesome. He did eye my plate and portion of food but didn't say anything.

I am definitely getting stronger. I was always scared to talk in groups of people and finding it easier to converse with my son's hockey team parents and my daughter's dance parents as well. Also I'm in University and answered my first question in a class of 75 last week. Feels good to be confident! :)

Thanks everyone for the support. I can't believe I didn't think of not telling him, like that was even an option! Ha! :)

So proud of u on all accomplishments and u just keep gettin stronger. We r here for u as u can see:). So get some sleep and I'll pray for a good rest of the visit. Remember, ur life, house, n rules. Nn

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xmarycontraryx    234

xmarycontraryx
Posted

Hey December Sleevers! We've got a great group of friends on my fitness pal sharing support and food diaries for great meal ideas!

Sign up and join us! You can find me at xmarycontraryx or maryallisondixon@gmail.com

DeezJeanz reacted to this

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meamo    42

meamo
Posted

Hey December Sleevers! We've got a great group of friends on my fitness pal sharing support and food diaries for great meal ideas!

Sign up and join us! You can find me at xmarycontraryx or maryallisondixon@gmail.com

I can't figure out how to add friends to my fitness pal :( I have been trying to but unsuccessful...

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Halfpint1218    36

Halfpint1218
Posted

I can't figure out how to add friends to my fitness pal :( I have been trying to but unsuccessful...

What's your user name and I'll connect you. I'm stabuch.

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Texasmeg    568

Texasmeg
Posted

Going back to work tomorrow and feeling a little nervous about having enough energy - but mainly nervous about the questions from coworkers. I haven't told them why I was having surgery (though they know that I did have it). A couple of people asked what my surgery was for and I told them I didn't really want to discuss it.

People will probably notice the weight loss and comment. I plan to just smile and say thanks.

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AtlantaRed    651

AtlantaRed
Posted

Maybe just tell them you had girl issues and while recuperating, you lost some weight and it has motivated you to continue!

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meamo    42

meamo
Posted

What's your user name and I'll connect you. I'm stabuch.

Mine is..itzel727

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jess9395    5,450

jess9395
Posted

Hey December Sleevers! We've got a great group of friends on my fitness pal sharing support and food diaries for great meal ideas! Sign up and join us! You can find me at xmarycontraryx or maryallisondixon@gmail.com

Just sent a request! Would love to hook up with folks. I am Jess9395 or Jessica.stw@gmail.com

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jess9395    5,450

jess9395
Posted (edited)

I can't figure out how to add by username on MFP only by email!

So please add me!

Jess9395 or Jessica.stw@gmail.com

Edited by jess9395

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Kiap82    239

Kiap82
Posted

Im kiap82 or kiap82@hotmail.com on MFP. Feel free to add me!

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RunningA5K    645

RunningA5K
Posted

I am Maddiewin1 on MFP. Would love to have more MFP pals.

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Go To Topic Listing Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums

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    • LeighaTR

      LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.

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