I don't want to be the constant bringer up of the shit we've been put through being fat. We know don't need reminders, but it seems as I've got small I have to continue to put up with being bullied just to keep the peace.

My boyfriend whom I love honestly more than any other man I've ever loved in my life has absolutely no idea the hell I've been through. He was the popular boy, well to do brought up happy all american everything came to him when needed. Me, the girl fat made fun of never allowed in groups constantly talked about and put down and just to have socialization I learned to accept the fat girl jokes as my way of fitting in.

Today, he and I had a beautiful day. We went to the masters watched golf and I wound up getting sick, dehydrated and vomited. Wound up having to go to first aid and be treated by a doc and get some zofran because the vomiting was pretty bad. Monday I had a severe seizure and that has left me this entire week weak sick tired lethargic and just plain sick. Today wondering around I was walking slow and he got upset and said he didn't want to walk like we were retarded at such a slow pace. I just couldn't keep up and then boom the vomiting started. On our way home I told him was his best friend going to come over to pick up the masters tickets for tomorrow or what. He said no we are going to drive them over. It's 11pm and all three kids are asleep and I for one and wore out. His buddy's kids were at a sleep over and they were having a party at their house. I said why can't he swing by in the morning to pick them up. I'm hit with instant attitude. He just doesn't get keeping me and my three kids out past midnight isn't such a problem. When I brought it up that I'm good to him and I take good care of hi and how he treats me at times it hurts he told me basically I live my life in a woes me kinda style. I didn't have this or that so wahh I didn't get this and I'm going to continue to live my life as the victim in my life. I don't understand. I want him to understand as a parent you put your kids first. When your first can drive by the next day to get tickets let that occur don't put them above the familly you "say" is your family. Then he brings up when we were first six mos together i wsa never sickand now I constantly i am. I'm tired and I keep viruses ever since I had my appendix rupture in November. Then this monday I have this seizure. I just want him to understand he's a dad. his family comes first .. like I put my family first I don't get it. I want help understanding somebody tell me if I"m wrong or if I'm right I need help.

Thanks a lot for your responses.

He really is an amazing man. I actually talked to his best friend last night. One thing I told him is for one Austin is 37yrs old. He's never had a child and then suddenly he meets me a mom with three 11' date='9 and 3. He immediately delve into the role of dad, trying like all new dads do. One thing I think he struggles with is learning to put them completely first. He doesn't quiet get that its not smart to be out on holidays late at night because of drunks or because their tired etc. I talked to his best friend who's been a dad for 11 years like me and he said he's gonna see if he can kinda get him to that final ah-ha dad moment of okay it really isn't about me anymore. He plans on adopting my son and is adamantly trying with the girls. I'm frustrated because when he gets in these moods he gets hateful, stubborn and he doesn't get its about the kids. So I'm trying to figure out HOW to get him to see this and stop it because he's did this sorta thing more than once. His mom actually had to jump him one night before he just kept lingering around talking and she was was like "AUSTIN YOUR KIDS HAVE TO GO TO BED!" I try to say stuff, but then thats when his defensiveness kicks in. So what do u do? Whats worse is we're dealing with a shrink.. he's a psychologist himself. o.O[/quote']

Sc-

He's a shrink. He should understand about push buttons. You have em. I have em. Hopefully he's teachable. Give him a little time and if these selfish patterns continue or return- you have a tough choice to make.

Personally, Sounds like you are giving alot and asking for a little understanding. It really sounds reasonable to me that he should accommodate you a bit more.

Yup ur right bout the buttons part. Thanks for ur reply. Yall have helped me a lot made me feel better and I appreciate it. A lot.