Hi All.

I was banded on Feb 8th. Thought this would be a moment of excitement. I can say the surgery went pretty good. Aside from pain on my said and a little back pain (maybe from the gas, not sure) I am doing okay. Using my spirometer to practice breathing. Last night when I got home from the hospital I started crying. I wanted it out of me. I don't know what came over me. I starting feeling like..what the heck did I just do? Did I really try hard enough doing it on my own? I started feeling this overwhelming feeling of being freaked out something is wrapped around my stomach right now. My husband tried to console me. Said I did a good thing and to remember how long I had worked to get to this point. It didn't help. I just want to know if anyone else had these feelings. I feel so alone in these thoughts. Everyone on here seems so excited. I can feel the soreness on the side, will I ever feel like my own self again? I mean will I ever not be aware of feeling it there? I think what I feel is just soreness from the port. I don't think it is from the band because when I drink it doesn't feel different. After a while, will I feel my old self again? I keep rambling. It is 6:25am and I am up. I just can't believe I feel like calling my doctor and having him take it out. I don't know what is wrong with me right now. To top it off, I have gained like 5 lbs. Nurse said it is all the IV fluids.

:cry

Sweetie its most likely a reaction from the anesthesia...

Hang in there it will get better.

Thanks TracyinKS.

Just you replying to this is making me cry right now. I will try to keep my mind off it. I am so happy you responded. I can't tell you how much this website has helped me.

Really? You had those feelings too. Thanks so much for replying. It is making me feel better.

I need to figure out how to do the signature so people can see my stuff too.

It's normalto feel like that after surgery for various reasons...but it will go away. The pain goes away and the swollen uncomfortable feeling also. The nurse is right...the weight is extra fluid from IV's and also swelling...in a couple of weeks you will see and feel a huge difference and when you weigh in you will see a drop... Hang in there! It is a life changing experience so feeling afraid and like you have made a mistake is a normal part of life...sort of like cold feet before a wedding, or how we feel when we break up...afraid of what will happen next...OMG:omg: life is going tobe so different...how will I cope??? You will cope just fine ...once you see some weight come off you will say...I am so happy I have the band!!:biggrin1:

Thanks so much for your response Angela. I really appreciate it.

Oh Hon, how horrible for you to feel this way. Two quick things as I am sure this will pass quickly. Like Tracy said it is probably just a result of the anesthesia.

1. You cannot feel the band, I am 10 days post op and it is the swelling that you are feeling. It will go away in a few days.

2. You are dealing with a life changing event. Your life will be different from now on and that is a scary thing to think about.

But these are good changes and you will be thankful in the long run. Hang in there for a few more days and it will all look different.

Mary

What you are feeling is very normal. Give yourself 3-4 months and reeval how you feel. This is a huge change, just think about the great quality of life you will have once this weight is off! ((((HUGS))))))) hang in there girl we are there for you! Jill

Hello - I just had to respond to your post about your feelings of "regret"? I just had surgery on Feb 7 and I absolutely felt the same way you do. I kind of panicked thinking "Gee I've got this alien thing around my stomach, what have I done, maybe I should go back to the doc and have him take it out?" Today I feel like it was the best thing I have ever done for my health. I am excited when I feel full after just 1/2 cup of coffee. There is still some uncomfortable moments, but every day I feel better. Please try not to dwell on the "device" inside of you. It will use up emotional energy that you don't have right now. When I was having those moments of "oh no", I just focused on how great it will be to move around more freely, be more active and never have to diet like I used to and then gain back. You and I are newly banded and adjusting to our new perspective on life. Remember you are as normal as everyone else who is going through this and just jump on this forum and get your thoughts out. You will get so much help and support because we are all really really here for each other and aren't we courageous girls for doing this? Feel proud of yourself - you are getting your control back. All the best to you:kiss2:

You guys are making me feel so much better. I don't know what I would do without your support. I don't even know you personally, but feel such a great connection. Priscilla, I totally felt like calling my doctor to have him take it out. I will try not to focus on it and give it more time. I guess I got anxiety over something being in me and I panicked.

Love to you all!

Oh I just did my ticker, and never calculated the total weight I should lose. Uh, can I say I am horrified at how much I have to lose. Wow, I must of been in denial or something. I knew the numbers of what I weighed and what I needed to get to, but I never calculated the difference for some reason. Seeing it on my ticker I about passed out! AMAZING..this is so enlightening this experience. So scary, but so life changing in many levels. The awareness I have now of how far out of control I have gotten. The awareness of what things are going to be like with a new relationship with food. Thanks for being there guys. I hope I can be of help too, soon...instead of being a big crying mess.

Mfw1941

Thanks for that info on not feeling it inside you. That is a nice thought. To be able to feel normal again is what I will be looking forward to. So, your soreness was gone in a few days and then it felt normal again?

I was banded in December and I found that the first week was the worst - the second week a little better but after that it is totally terrific. You feel back to normal - and you start to see how the band works. Of course you'll have some ups and downs as you get ready to have your first fill and you're dealing with all this new stuff but it's so awesome to get up everyday and think - today, maybe I'll lose a pound! Think positive!!

Good to know LuckyGirl. I am going to try hard to be positive. Ahh..I am normally upbeat and positive...I want to be again.

My first conscious thought after surgery was, "What the hell have I done to myself?"

My insurance company required an overnight stay in the hospital and by early the next morning I was crying in bed. I wanted my husband to be there, I wanted to be home, I wanted not to be banded. That lasted about 45 minutes till my real brain cells took over and gave me a good slap in the face.

It was a rough adjustment in the beginning, but I concentrated on following the surgeon's instructions so I healed without complications. One step at a time, eye on the goal and frequent visits to this forum for support.

I think you're reacting very normally to such a life-changing event. You'll get past this and find that things may not go 100% smoothly from now on, but you sure are headed in the right direction. Reread this post in 4 months and see how differently you feel.

lapband4menow,

I gotta tell ya, you wont feel like the "old self again" wasnt that the purpose for seeking out the band? I'm almost 2 years out and your life changes. you dont center enjoyment around food, start now looking for other ways to celebrate and socialize. that was my greatest feat. I shop now for cute size 8-10 (when swelling goes down) jeans in stores I never thought I could shop in. I have felt the same way, now only right after but thru out too. I was very open about being banded almost spokesperson for my Dr. I live in a very small town and only 1 person, a checker at the grocery store said," you cheated" well, then the food monster inside came out I wanted to eat eat eat and felt like a failure because i couldnt succeed without the band. well, screw her I am skinnier than her now!! lol

every thing changes so be prepared to change too. I mean more the food types, portions, and drinking and eating. Your perspective will also change as you loose weight and realize the increase in self esteem you have. at 277lbs I would never face that cashier again I would agree that I was a failure and overweight, now with the confidence I have I let her know in a friendly, in your face type way that I am skinner than her, I even offered her my larger pants cause they were "too big"

Keep positive you are almost done with the hardest physical part, ok aside from the damn exercise. Good luck keep me posted!