Whenever I am doubting this journey that I am on, or feeling like it's too extreme a measure to take to get healthier, I try to reflect on what my life has been like as an obese person. As shameful as it is to think about these things, it really strengthens my resolve to take control of my life and my health. Maybe it will help others, too.

I am tired. I am tired of...

- having to buy clothes solely from catalogs or website

- having to think "Can I fit? Can I walk that distance? Will I bump something if I try to squeeze through there?"

- having my kids assume I ate the last of ANYthing in the house

- not doing things or going places because of how I look

- having difficulty getting clean

- losing my breath over the simplest physical movements

- aching all over my body

- having sleep apnea

- not being able to be a passenger on my husband's motorcycle because I'm too heavy

- assuming that anytime someone treats me poorly, it's because I'm fat

- the looks of pity...or, even worse, disgust

- knowing that, as much as he loves me, my husband doesn't find me attractive

- feeling like such a failure because I don't have "any willpower" or "If you just tried such-and-so you could lose weight"

- being constantly aware of my body

I'm sure y'all could add your own.

I was tired of ppl asking or assuming I was pregnant... Um, nope, just fat.

- knowing that, as much as he loves me, my husband doesn't find me attractive

Right there, that stopped me in my tracks and damn near broke my heart. I am so sorry darlin' you feel like that. Loving someone is being attracted to them. All of them. Inside and out. x

I was tired of ppl asking or assuming I was pregnant... Um, nope, just fat.

Ya, I slugged em for that.

You are not alone in any of those things!

I wonder if I will actually clean my house more often when I have lost weight. Right now I am too heavy to do a good job.

-Too embarrassed to go to the lake or float the river 'cause everyone would see my fat white legs in shorts (I used to be a whitewater rafting guide so this one really hits home)

-My ankles hurting so bad by the middle of the day I can hardly walk.

-Feeling really bad that my poor horse has to carry my fat ass around.

Actually, these were the last three "straws" that convinced me to have this surgery. There's a huge list of other little things, but whenever I start having doubts and fears, these are the three cons that pushes sleeve surgery back to the top of the list.

Thank you for this post, I'm having a lot of negative self-talk lately and am doubting myself. This is a good reminder why I'm doing this!

I want to be able to go places with my family. For the past two weekends, I have chosen not to go on activities because I don't want to be seen this large.

I want to sit on my sofa and not have the cushion sink all the way down.

I want to sit on folding chairs and not be afraid they will break.

I want to walk between the aisles in my classroom and not worry about bumping my kids with my hips/butt.

I want to walk around my school without sweating and being out of breath.

I want to be able to clean my house without my back hurting.

I want my plantar fasciitis to go away.

I want to sleep the whole night and not wake up with back pain at 3am.

There is so much more...

Yes to the folding chair thing! Summer is the worst for this with lawn chairs and such.

I want to stay alive to see my grand kids if and when they come along and to see my children grow into adults

I want to go swimming on the beach I live by without green peace flying over shouting " keep her wet" "turn her over"

I want to shop in a normal size shop

I want to feel better about myself

I would like to be able to wipe my bum without feeling like I'm taking a job in mission impossible

Is like to be able to stick it to my parents and show them they can't make fun of my size anymore

And lastly.. I wanna be normal

I want to be able to go places with my family. For the past two weekends' date=' I have chosen not to go on activities because I don't want to be seen this large.

I want to sit on my sofa and not have the cushion sink all the way down.

I want to sit on folding chairs and not be afraid they will break.

I want to walk between the aisles in my classroom and not worry about bumping my kids with my hips/butt.

I want to walk around my school without sweating and being out of breath.

I want to be able to clean my house without my back hurting.

I want my plantar fasciitis to go away.

I want to sleep the whole night and not wake up with back pain at 3am.

There is so much more...[/quote']

I related to what you put about plantar fasciitis and wanted to tell you it does go away! Yay! I'm down 68 pounds and no longer have any issues with my feet. Something to look forward to!

I related to what you put about plantar fasciitis and wanted to tell you it does go away! Yay! I'm down 68 pounds and no longer have any issues with my feet. Something to look forward to!

That is the best news I've heard all day!

Whenever I am doubting this journey that I am on' date=' or feeling like it's too extreme a measure to take to get healthier, I try to reflect on what my life has been like as an obese person. As shameful as it is to think about these things, it really strengthens my resolve to take control of my life and my health. Maybe it will help others, too.

I am tired. I am tired of...

- having to buy clothes solely from catalogs or website

- having to think "Can I fit? Can I walk that distance? Will I bump something if I try to squeeze through there?"

- having my kids assume I ate the last of ANYthing in the house

- not doing things or going places because of how I look

- having difficulty getting clean

- losing my breath over the simplest physical movements

- aching all over my body

- having sleep apnea

- not being able to be a passenger on my husband's motorcycle because I'm too heavy

- assuming that anytime someone treats me poorly, it's because I'm fat

- the looks of pity...or, even worse, disgust

- knowing that, as much as he loves me, my husband doesn't find me attractive

- feeling like such a failure because I don't have "any willpower" or "If you just tried such-and-so you could lose weight"

- being constantly aware of my body

I'm sure y'all could add your own.[/quote']

The worst one was hearing you have such a pretty face. Only if you would just lose the weight.

Linda305

I am tired of being alone and not feeling worthy of being loved... It's tough for anyone but in the gay community we are particularly critical of each other... I am tired of constant stomach or IBS issues... I know it's tough road but I'm looking forward to see where it leads... I also can't wait to shop in a "normal" department store!

I don't go to the grocery store nearest my house for fear I will run into someone I know.

I won't return a facebook message of a friend I haven't seen in 15 years because she wants to get together for coffee and I'm embarrassed by what I've become. (My rational mind knows she will NOT judge me.)

I won't shop at the mall to shop for clothes - I only shop on line.

I have no pictures of myself in the past 15 years - I am always the one taking the picture so I don't have to be in the picture.

I felt the same way about my husband until we sat down and had an honest conversation about my weight for the first time in ....well, ever. I told him I can't believe he finds me attractive and would want to touch me. I was wrong and let's just say, things in that department have been much, much better in the past couple of months. It was MY hangup, not his.

Stay strong! Believe in yourself.

Whenever I am doubting this journey that I am on' date=' or feeling like it's too extreme a measure to take to get healthier, I try to reflect on what my life has been like as an obese person. As shameful as it is to think about these things, it really strengthens my resolve to take control of my life and my health. Maybe it will help others, too.

I am tired. I am tired of...

- having to buy clothes solely from catalogs or website

- having to think "Can I fit? Can I walk that distance? Will I bump something if I try to squeeze through there?"

- having my kids assume I ate the last of ANYthing in the house

- not doing things or going places because of how I look

- having difficulty getting clean

- losing my breath over the simplest physical movements

- aching all over my body

- having sleep apnea

- not being able to be a passenger on my husband's motorcycle because I'm too heavy

- assuming that anytime someone treats me poorly, it's because I'm fat

- the looks of pity...or, even worse, disgust

- knowing that, as much as he loves me, my husband doesn't find me attractive

- feeling like such a failure because I don't have "any willpower" or "If you just tried such-and-so you could lose weight"

- being constantly aware of my body

I'm sure y'all could add your own.[/quote']

Thank you for posting this. Helps to know that I'm not alone.

I'm tired too. I'm tired of not living my life because it's no fun doing anything this fat!