Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Just putting it out there, so 'dirty' little secrets may see the light of day!



Recommended Posts

Ugh. Feeling a touch guilty, and naughty.

We had "Thanksgiving Dinner" with my son, who leaves Nov. 3 for boot camp. I ate 2oz turkey, 4 green Beans in bacon, one small bite of mashed potatoes with gravy, maybe four cranberries from homemade sauce.....and a really big bite of strawberry rhubarb pie. Ugh. And it made me HUNGRY. I feel like I failed (I know I didn't), but some days, some circumstances become too much. Blah!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ugh. Feeling a touch guilty' date=' and naughty. We had "Thanksgiving Dinner" with my son, who leaves Nov. 3 for boot camp. I ate 2oz turkey, 4 green Beans in bacon, one small bite of mashed potatoes with gravy, maybe four cranberries from homemade sauce.....and a really big bite of strawberry rhubarb pie. Ugh. And it made me HUNGRY. I feel like I failed (I know I didn't), but some days, some circumstances become too much. Blah![/quote']

This sounded delicious lol.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ugh. Feeling a touch guilty' date=' and naughty.

We had "Thanksgiving Dinner" with my son, who leaves Nov. 3 for boot camp. I ate 2oz turkey, 4 green Beans in bacon, one small bite of mashed potatoes with gravy, maybe four cranberries from homemade sauce.....and a really big bite of strawberry rhubarb pie. Ugh. And it made me HUNGRY. I feel like I failed (I know I didn't), but some days, some circumstances become too much. Blah![/quote'],

But if you think to previous thanksgiving meals and what you ate then and what you ate now it sounds like a victory to me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ugh. Feeling a touch guilty' date=' and naughty. We had "Thanksgiving Dinner" with my son, who leaves Nov. 3 for boot camp. I ate 2oz turkey, 4 green Beans in bacon, one small bite of mashed potatoes with gravy, maybe four cranberries from homemade sauce.....and a really big bite of strawberry rhubarb pie. Ugh. And it made me HUNGRY. I feel like I failed (I know I didn't), but some days, some circumstances become too much. Blah![/quote']

That sounds to me about how much a toddler would eat. It doesn't sound like too much? Apart from the pie, it just sounds like a regular meal.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think my dirty little secret is I have thrown away entirely the concept of good and bad foods. Just entirely. A donut is as good as asparagus is as good as a baked potato is as good as some lifesavers candy. Yesterday I had 32 ounces of orange juice and an entire baked potato and a quarter jar of Peanut Butter and my body felt super-good at the end of the night, carbs and calories whatever. I knew I'd be running today anyway, and I ate some candy while I ran to stave off hypoglycemia since I'm tired of nearly passing out after I work out because I didn't want to have too many carbs.

Attitudes and behaviors may be "bad" or disordered but that's not the fault of the food. I'm tailoring my eating to my body which means trusting myself and trusting my body which means it can't be bad.

Eating food that I don't like because it's "good for me" is actually bad for me because it makes me dislike the food even more and rebel against doing what's good for me, which means rebelling against my own body. I will try all kinds of foods now but no more forcing. I'll never have a milkshake again because it gives me the runs now. I loved milkshakes but I'm ok with that. And I won't eat avocado no matter how much it's pushed on me as a superfood because I don't freaking like it. That's the only way I want foods to be good or bad, what do they do for me, specifically? No one else can tell me that. Cutting out entire categories of food in order to "maximize weight loss" has been pointless (my scale doesn't seem to care at all how "good" I've been by depriving myself) and unsustainable and leads to binging.

Dirty secret: for the past few weeks I have been using a computer script on myfitnesspal so I can't see the calories of food. I don't eat according to calories anymore. Myfitnesspal tracks them but I can't see them until the end of the day when I complete my entry. No more throwing in some last minute exercise so I can bring my calories down (does that even work?), no more planning my meals around any calories at all.

More power to you, sister! This is how I got fat in the first place. :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I crave salt so bad that this morning, I sprinkled salt on a plate and licked it off. Really, how insane is that?!

you didn't follow it with a shot of tequila and some lime?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That sounds to me about how much a toddler would eat. It doesn't sound like too much? Apart from the pie' date=' it just sounds like a regular meal.[/quote']

It wasn't too much, just wrong stuff for me. Too much carb and sugar.

In reflection, being focused on the people rather than the good was an awesome! Really hearing the stories people were telling. Watching my 5'10" 148lb (who leaves for boot camp in a week) son put away two HUGE plates of good, and THREE pieces of pie. Knowing he's ok, knowing that he was filled to near EXPLODING (love that he has an ubber metabolism). The laughter was worth everything. Even when they were laughing at the sheer ridiculousness that accounted for my meal...not at me, but that it's so much better/healthier for me...and tiny...still funny though.

I have to learn a better way for me, just taking more time than I want.

Thanks for listening!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

First, I applaud you for spilling your dirty secret. Are you pre or post-op? If you are post-op- How much have you or do you expect to lose base on your mantra about food? Everyone has foods they don't like, for me it's broccoli. However, throwing out foods that are "nutritionally sound", doesn't help you in the long run and is clearly contradictory to the reason most of had surgery. Eating the things you did in the quantity you did, means there are some food issues you may need to address. Unless you are running at least a half marathon, it will take a lot more than a simple run to burn off what you consumed. If this behavior works for you or anyone who wants to take a similar path, good luck to you all. Maybe 6 months from now you'll be 80+lbs down and I'm wrong but skirting everything and dismissing it may not be the best thing. No matter what you reason for your mindset, I wish you well on your journey.

Thanks for the well-wishes. I'm six months out! I don't dismiss anything except the concept of good or bad foods for anyone but myself! I also realize that I am not and have never been addicted to food which definitely has an impact on my philosophy. I do track Protein and make sure I'm getting in at least 8 glasses of liquids. When I don't do those things it slows down my weight loss, the lack of fluids impacts my digestive system and low protein starts to affect hair health. Because I have problems with low blood sugar after physical activity I keep small things on hand to help with that. I eat a diet high in Fiber and note how that effects my body, because after surgery I've found there is a delicate balance between a better-functioning digestive system and dehydration from too much fiber. I have a lot of structure in my eating.

I definitely think we should be very mindful of what we eat but to me that means paying attention to how eating makes you feel and putting yourself in optimal situations to encourage your best eating behavior based on that. This is based on Ellyn Satter's Eating Competence Model, which I've known about for a few years since before surgery I worked with a nutritionist who advocated it, but I never felt the freedom to implement it before because I was certain I would just eat everything. This led to the standard overthinking-deprivation-mindlessness-binge cycle a lot of us have gone through. When I saw it was still happening after surgery, the same "I can't eat this because it's high carbs" or "I have to eat every three hours precisely no matter how I feel" and "every meal must have a vegetable or it's not really a meal," I knew I couldn't live like this forever even if I was losing weight. I would eat too much on my "reward day" (another diet concept) and feel crappy.

Reading this thread and getting fed up with the concept of guilt being connected with something as wonderful as food inspired me to get Satter's book "Secrets of Feeding a Healthy Family" about a month ago. I read bits at a time and started incorporating elements into my life. The overall philosophy of making meals satisfying, delicious and important and allowing the body to adjust clicked for me, but I still didn't trust that I wouldn't just eat a bunch of donuts or something. But that didn't happen at all. I am highly aware of what I eat and why, it's just that nothing is forbidden unless it makes me feel poorly which at the moment I don't tie one way or the other to weight. I'm still losing weight, another seven pounds in the last couple of weeks.

I do work out six days a week and am training for a half marathon. Since I don't track calories I don't eat back my exercise calories, but if I check the myfitnesspal reports at the end of the week I am eating a caloric deficit. The calories consumed on a day of Peanut Butter and bacon are followed by the calories consumed on a day of chicken and spinach.

I got the surgery because I hated the feeling that my body had betrayed me, which is how I felt when I was diagnosed with diabetes. I felt the surgery was my hope for being freed from that because it would go a long way to fix my body and help resolve the diabetes and remnants of PCOS. But it was my attitude about my body that was the betrayal.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can't believe this thread is still going strong, LOL!!!

Going to the renaissance faire with my hubby and some friends this weekend. I'm sure I will return with a ton of debauchery to report come Monday ;-)

Funnel cakes. Turkey legs. Scotch eggs. Cider. Beer. Mead. More cider. Pirogis. Even more cider. Some more mead ... LOL ...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I made the mistake of buying SF Ocean Spray packs on Amazon pre-op. I now have about 450 packets that I finde undrinkable. My family glares at me every time I tell them to finish them up. HA! I need to find the singles before I will buy them in mass quantities again. :D Thank you' date=' though![/quote']

If you have a store called dollar general near you that's where I found mine.

Sent from my iPhone using VST

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh my word this is so freaking funny... :lol: I take it easy on weekends.Last Saturday,after my weekly weigh in, I had 100ml of red wine (yummy , plus I felt fine..not even light headed) and later after dinner, I had one block of chocolate.. :rolleyes: mmmmmm

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can't believe this thread is still going strong' date=' LOL!!!

Going to the renaissance faire with my hubby and some friends this weekend. I'm sure I will return with a ton of debauchery to report come Monday ;-)

Funnel cakes. Turkey legs. Scotch eggs. Cider. Beer. Mead. More cider. Pirogis. Even more cider. Some more mead ... LOL ...[/quote']

What the heck are scotch eggs? I like scotch and eggs :) Im imagining an egg pickled in scotch maybe?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What the heck are scotch eggs? I like scotch and eggs :) Im imagining an egg pickled in scotch maybe?

A scotch egg is a hard boiled egg wrapped in Breakfast sausage, rolled in breadcrumbs and deep fried. So, so good. So so BAAAAAD but so so GOOD! LOL.

That being said ... An egg pickled in scotch doesn't sound half bad, LOL!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A scotch egg is a hard boiled egg wrapped in breakfast sausage' date=' rolled in breadcrumbs and deep fried. So, so good. So so BAAAAAD but so so GOOD! LOL.

[/quote']

A way back I posted a recipe for gluten free scotch eggs baked.. Not fried!! It's delicious!!! They're delicious.. Give them a try!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A way back I posted a recipe for gluten free scotch eggs baked.. Not fried!! It's delicious!!! They're delicious.. Give them a try!!

I've done them in the oven before - and they're just as good!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×