Hi, I'm a newbie and a bit of a computer phobic lol just trying to get to grips with things. I have a number of very close friends who are being very supportive of my decision to have surgery. Alas there are lot's who are not! can anyone advise how to deal with negativity? :-)

What I have a tendency to do is to give people the info and then step back and watch there reactions. When my best friend told me I wasn't that big, I didn't need surgery, etc. I then questioned my decision. I did research, I focused on preparing for the surgery and I distanced myself from her....when I did see her, I seen her struggle with my skinniness. Thus my username is MsSkinniness. She still struggles with it today. People are always telling me how much weight they have lost and I'm totally happy for them. No one has told me they have lost a humongous amount of weight and have been able to maintain that weight. It's interesting because my friends are asking me if they lost 20 lbs, would they have a lot of excess skin. My reply is IDK. But I do know that I'd rather be skinny and healthy with a little bit of excess skin than carry around that extra 20 lbs or even the 80 lbs that I lost. This is a journey and it's wonderful in so many ways and also difficult at the same time. It's not the easy way out.

After reading these answers and contemplating things. I have come to the realisation that most of the negative people have indeed been those, that have been helping to kill me with kindness. Some when being told I am dieting have bought me boxes of chocolates. Others have made a point of making my favourite fattening foods. Often "but you have a pretty face" (thats in the eye of the beholder lol) is said while discouraging me to diet and now I'm having the sleeve.

I will change body size, but I will still be me. I think some are worried I will change, become someone else. Well they will see I will just be a happier me and they will have to like it or lump it lol :-)

The secretary at my job is THE only one that questioned me. She was just totally negative..which is nothing new since she's always negative. I straight up told her," if I could have lost the weight any other way I would have by now... And it's my decision. Thank you for your concern, but I'm going to ask you to respect my decision." She simply said alright and we haven't spoken about it since...