I thought it might be a good idea to have a thread where we could discuss the different challenges/issues we face as being single and banded.

I'll start with introducing myself. My name is Chris, I am 32 and live in a suburb of Boston. About a year ago I got out of a 5 year relationship and have just casually dated (online dating) since then. I have decided to take a break from dating for a bit, so I can focus on myself and adjust to living life as a bandster. (I was just banded on 10/2). One of my biggest concerns when I start dating again is if/when to tell that I am banded. It's not that I don't want to tell people, it's just that my idea of great dinner conversation does not include discussing my weight. Overall I would say that I have a great life. I have a good job, a very supportive family, and lots of friends. I am happy to be taking control over my weight and issues with food, and am excited at the prospect of my future as a not-so-fat woman.

I look forward to meeting more single bandsters and hope this thread takes off!

Chris :cocktail:

No tricks that I am aware of anyway. I went to Italy for two weeks last xmas break by myself and it was great. I wish I was going back there again. Are you doing a singles tour or singles cruise? I would recommend those for mingling purposes. Any ?s ask......

Ugh I offically hate both of yall..Italy..or a beach trip..Man o man I would kill for one..a trip ANYWHERE would be nice at this point..what a great way to meet people

Tifferoni, I'd rather be 22 again

Key West it is, reservations made and everything

Are you going snorkeling or scuba diving? Hey, where do you live? A long time ago on one of your pix I noticed it said something about Dallas, you live here?

i was thinking about that bobby i am about to be single things are not working out between me and my soon to be he is letting his mommy get in the way of our relationship i mean if we have a argument he will run and tell mommy i mean i dont do that i usually don't tell anyone and keep:girl_hug: it between us because that is the way it should be but sorry for venting :whoo:

I'm afraid I'm going to be one jaded girl if the dating increases once I lose weight. Anyone experience that?

Of course the dating is likely going to increase when you're lighter. That's the way the world works. Most people are wired to like thinner & healthier partners (male or female). Don't be jaded, just be glad you're moving that direction.

I went to Italy for two weeks last xmas break by myself and it was great...

Hey, where do you live?

Where did you go? I want to make it to Maranello soon, hopefully this next fall. Re: location, I'm in the DFW area. I try to keep my identity a bit vague on this board, because most people in my meatspace life don't know I have this band

sorry for venting :whoo:

That's what this thread is for, no?

Looks like JC, Di and Chrispy are all long gone, hope I drop off this thread soon

Hey Manatee! I'm still single hon just not dating right now. Gonna wait till the holidays are over. I don't need added stress of a date right now. I'm still a bit bummed about the last guy and feeling bad about it too. So this is a good break for me. How are u fairing? Any new hotties?

<p>NO worries here, your secret is safe with us! Many people here are undercover! lol </p> <p> </p> <p>Letsee....I went alot of places it was one of those rushed, "Lets visit everywhere tours!" LOL I went to Rome, Venice-New Year's Eve, Milan, Tuscany, Florence, Isle of Capri, Sorrento, and one small town that I forgot the name of it but it is one of the cities that make up the "5 fingers." I can't wait to go back and if I am still single in a few years I might pack up and go! </p> <p> </p> <p>What's all on the agenda for Key West? How long are you going for?</p>

Dibaby--When did you decide to start dating? I have a certain goal weight in mind but boy I think it might take a while to get there!

Nope, no hotties, or even coldies

I have absolutely no agenda in KW -- just a B&B room for 6 nights and airline tickets. I like unstructured vacations.

I did message a couple of ladies from KW just to see if they would like to meet up for a drink, but no luck. No surprise there :eek:

Heck, I don't know that I would do that. I mean if I talked to you a while that would be one thing but , these days, you never know what kind of crazy is on the other side of the computer screen! So, you might be better off just going to a bar and finding someone to have drinks with you there!

Are you going to be there on NY Eve? I always love being somewhere new for NY's.

Hey Manatee! I'm still single hon just not dating right now. Gonna wait till the holidays are over. I don't need added stress of a date right now. I'm still a bit bummed about the last guy and feeling bad about it too. So this is a good break for me. How are u fairing? Any new hotties?

Di, I am sorry you're feeling bad. I guess you didn't tell us that you had a relationship break up?

I hope we haven't lost Crispy and Jc for good. Maybe they will check in with us.

Hi all... I haven't been on LBT since late November, so I don't know if anyone remembers me. Things have been a little crazy for me on the road to singledom. My separation from my husband has taken a nasty turn. He refuses to leave the house and, so I have decided to take the step. I was avoiding leaving since we have 2 12-year old children and didn't want to take them from their home, but the stress is affecting my health now. For the past month I have not been able to eat anything without throwing it up. I don't know if this happens to you guys, but stress tightens my band. I have been living on coffee, cigarettes, and soft mushy foods, but only when I am not home. If I am home, I can't even drink water... it just comes back up. Whenever I eat or drink anything, I can hear gurgling (sounds like hunger pangs) which makes me believe that my band is really tight. Anyone have any ideas on this? I spoke to my internist about possibly giving me something for the stress and anxiety (and yes, I am having anxiety attacks from worrying about money and legal fees) but I was told that the "anti-depressives" could possibly make you gain weight (so I am definitely not taking those). My blood pressure which was finally normal after many years has been creeping up again (although thankfully the weight has not crept up -- yet). I feel like I am in turmoil and if I don't get out of the situation, I am going to end up hospitalized. As for me, I cannot wait to be single again, free from the control of HIM!!! I am signing a lease for an apartment tonight (not really big enough for the 3 of us, but it will do for now) and we move in as of February 1st. I hope I make it until then... Hope I didn't bore you guys, but just wanted to catch up. Thanks for "listening"...

Yvonne

Di, I am sorry you're feeling bad. I guess you didn't tell us that you had a relationship break up?

I hope we haven't lost Crispy and Jc for good. Maybe they will check in with us.

Oh I'm good. It wasn't much of a relationship anyways. Just a couple of weeks. I'm getting better at breaking things off early when I know things aren't going to work out.

Hi all... I haven't been on LBT since late November, so I don't know if anyone remembers me. Things have been a little crazy for me on the road to singledom. My separation from my husband has taken a nasty turn. He refuses to leave the house and, so I have decided to take the step. I was avoiding leaving since we have 2 12-year old children and didn't want to take them from their home, but the stress is affecting my health now. For the past month I have not been able to eat anything without throwing it up. I don't know if this happens to you guys, but stress tightens my band. I have been living on coffee, cigarettes, and soft mushy foods, but only when I am not home. If I am home, I can't even drink water... it just comes back up. Whenever I eat or drink anything, I can hear gurgling (sounds like hunger pangs) which makes me believe that my band is really tight. Anyone have any ideas on this? I spoke to my internist about possibly giving me something for the stress and anxiety (and yes, I am having anxiety attacks from worrying about money and legal fees) but I was told that the "anti-depressives" could possibly make you gain weight (so I am definitely not taking those). My blood pressure which was finally normal after many years has been creeping up again (although thankfully the weight has not crept up -- yet). I feel like I am in turmoil and if I don't get out of the situation, I am going to end up hospitalized. As for me, I cannot wait to be single again, free from the control of HIM!!! I am signing a lease for an apartment tonight (not really big enough for the 3 of us, but it will do for now) and we move in as of February 1st. I hope I make it until then... Hope I didn't bore you guys, but just wanted to catch up. Thanks for "listening"...

Yvonne

Hiya Yvonne,

Have you talked to your lawyer about any consequences from you leaving the house? Make sure that your ex isn't going to say that you abandoned the house. Then he can get everything. I had to make sure I still paid have the mortgage even though I wasn't living there. Which really really sucked. Anyways..good luck.

Di

Thanks Di... yes, I did speak with my lawyer. We actually have a 4-way meeting tomorrow to hash things out (should be fun) and we will advise my future ex and his lawyer that I will be moving out with the children on February 1st... By then we will have a separation agreement signed (I hope!!!)... I work for lawyers so I have an idea of what kind of things can happen, but I didn't think he would be so low as to tell me I have to take the kids and leave the house that they have been living in for 13 years of their lives... but that's okay, I hope he and his father rot in hell!!!

Yvonne