Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Boyfriend totally against WLS dont know what to do



Recommended Posts

I'm about to start my 4 month weight loss management and I'm having doubts AGAIN which is normal but I'm Having lots of talk with my boyfriend and he doesn't feel this is the way out. He feels I should commit to a diet and exercise and just sees me as being lazy and not wanting to put the extra time for exercise. It's easy for him to say but I have so much going on , work , kids , bills, body aches , PMs, hiatal hernia, reflux , GERD etc! I'm 38 years old 5'3 and 320 pounds.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You know what's right for you better than anyone else. My husband didn't want me to do it either, but now he's really happy I did it because I'm happy about it and feeling better!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can relate completely. My SO feels the same way. He doesn't think I've put in enough effort and believes this is way too drastic. His feelings are purely concern for me. He has even gone so far as to buy me exercise equipment this past weekend and offer to help pay for a trainer. His opinions are really clouding the issue for me, causing a lot of stress.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm about to start my 4 month weight loss management and I'm having doubts AGAIN which is normal but I'm Having lots of talk with my boyfriend and he doesn't feel this is the way out. He feels I should commit to a diet and exercise and just sees me as being lazy and not wanting to put the extra time for exercise. It's easy for him to say but I have so much going on ' date=' work , kids , bills, body aches , PMs, hiatal hernia, reflux , GERD etc! I'm 38 years old 5'3 and 320 pounds.[/quote']

Tell him you are going to lose weight if he doesn't agree consider him extra weight too ;) it's not as easy as simple diet I seen postings here with scientific proof . If we feel hungry from inside what can we do I remember I used to diet all the time and used to be so upset and miserable cause all I could think about was food ...

Sent from my iPhone using VST

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm about to start my 4 month weight loss management and I'm having doubts AGAIN which is normal but I'm Having lots of talk with my boyfriend and he doesn't feel this is the way out. He feels I should commit to a diet and exercise and just sees me as being lazy and not wanting to put the extra time for exercise. It's easy for him to say but I have so much going on ' date=' work , kids , bills, body aches , PMs, hiatal hernia, reflux , GERD etc! I'm 38 years old 5'3 and 320 pounds.[/quote']

Please don't mind me I'm just messing with you ;) it's the best thing I did for myself. Sugar , BP gone in 2 weeks no more insulin ;)

Sent from my iPhone using VST

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm going through the same thing. My boyfriend tells me everyday not to get it. It gets annoying! He even went as far to say he is going to leave me if i get surgery. SMH. My surgery is Feb 6 th, and only my God can stop me. i have to deal with my weight not him. I have to deal with heath issues not him. So I'm going to do something about it and get surgery. Its your body and your health at the end of the day!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

.........hiatal hernia, reflux , GERD etc! I'm 38 years old 5'3 and 320 pounds.

These things alone should be the determining factor.....it's your body and your choice.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Tell your bf its not a way out its a tool. If he is not behind you then he is a tool. Just kidding. Let him come on here and read some of the posts. Its probably just fear talking. People always say to me, whe I tell them I am having surgery in 8 days that Oh your'e not that big, Blah blah and I realized I have a lot of really nice friends but they are not helping me. I am doing this for me and luckily my hubby is supportive. Your BF will get there.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At the end of the day...it's ALL about you!! GO FOR IT!! GOOD LUCK!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At 5'3" 320 lbs, you are at grave risk. I agree with him on one thing, you need to commit to diet and exercise but you need the surgery that will supply the tool to lose the weight and keep it off. What people do not understand is it is almost impossible to exercise when you weigh 320. The pressure on your joints and you get out of breath before you can do any good. I know, I was there. You need to do this for your health, he needs to understand this. You need to understand that this is your body, your life and your health. This is a decision YOU must make for the right reasons. If he wants you around for a few more years and a quality of life that is good for the both of you, this surgery is vital. Good Luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The one suggestion that I can make is to have read maybe your Bariatric website or some other medical resource that allows him to see what the surgery is really about, how it is done and why we need it as a tool. Sometimes when people see the facts, they understand better. A lot of times they love you and are worried about the unknown and how it will affect them. Knowledge can be powerful. Good luck and stay strong in your decision to improve your life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Deleted

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I backed out two years ago thinking it was the easy way out kept trying different diets lost 30 and then only ended up 15lbs heavier then where I started.

Try the pre-op diet and have him try it with you and then have him tell you this is the easy way out, this pre-op diet is the hardest thing I have ever done! I have been on so many diets and all of them I can cheat which makes them easy, but unsuccessful, this I can't/won't cheat its a great tool to help me stay strong and save my life. Good luck with whatever you decide. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone for your advice. Yes it a very hard decision that only I can make. I want to be healthy and live a long life . getting this surgery is a risk but staying obese is an eve bigger risk. I want to exercise but I have pain on my heels pain at times in my back, knees. It's just a mess and I know I'll start the gym today and tomorrow ill have to stop due to some pain some where. I know my boyfriend just wants me to be able to keep my stomach the way it is and is very scared I won't ever be able to eat normal again. I know that's his concern.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Good lick in your decision. Remember though that being alive and enjoying life is better than the alternative. Here is hoping that he changes his mind.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Stone Art By SKL

      Decorative Wall Cladding & Panels | Stone Art By SKL
      Elevate your space with Stone Art By SKL's decorative wall claddings & panels. Explore premium designs for timeless elegance.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Losing my hair in clumps and still dealing with "stomach" issues from gallbladder removal surgery. On the positive side I'm doing better about meeting protein and water goals and taking my vitamins, so yay? 🤷‍♀️
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×