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Cheated and very scared/emotional



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I was sleeved a week ago tomorrow. My physician said Clear liquids only for week 1, and then progress to full liquids week 2-3.

So Christmas day I had watched as everyone enjoyed whatever goodies they wanted. In a moment of feeling sorry for myself, I ate a sugar cookie. Not that it really matters but I did chew until almost liquified.

I knew it was a mistake, but I didn't feel any reprocussions and I said I wouldn't do that again.

Today, Im feeling great a decided to take my daughter to Chick-fil-a and a movie. I told myself that I could resist the temptations, but quickly found myself in a familiar situation. I had one chicken nugget and one fry (well chewed). I felt terrible emotionally, but physically I was fine.

Then the movies... I took several bites of popcorn.< /p>

So my thoughts/questions:

1. Have I completely messed this up?

2. Why am I never satisfied?

3. Should I be able to drink all day without ever feeling a problem?

4. Has anyone else/ felt similar?

5. Though I have outward incisions, why don't I feel anything internally? I used a very reputable physician.

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I hope you are thick skinned bc you're going to get a serious reality check from some of the posters here...

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When you post on a public forum, you have to take the good with the bad...

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*the bad with the good.

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Well you are still alive and breathing , don't worry and don't feel bad . Some people take everything too serious and I appreciate your honesty. I'm sure you are not the only one in the world who has done this :)

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And this is the exact reason why I planned to have my surgery after the holidays lol too tempting !

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I would say that in the grand scheme of things, and in the long run, these moments of weakness won't matter AS LONG AS YOU NIP IT IN THE BUD now. Believe me, I am on day 10 of the post-op full liquid diet, and I also watched my family eat lots of good food, so I know how you feel. OK, I did eat two small teaspoons of speadable cheese and an equally small bite of mashed potatoes. Not all in one day, but still. I'm not perfect.

I have to ask how in the world you tolerated popcorn? That is crazy....

-Kendra

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1. no but if you continue this pattern, you will.

2. you should talk with your nutrionist and physician.

3. You should be feeling a sensation of being full.

4. Don't know

5. Don't know

You probaly need to stay at home and try to manage and become accustomed your diet. Right now it appears that you have little self control and until you can control yourself and stick to the diet, being in places that could trigger these bad habits are not good for you. Go back to your liquids and follow your doctor and Nutritonists instructions.

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You need to call your surgeon ASAP and let them know. Your stomach is far from healed and they need to know to monitor you extra closely for leaks and/or other complications.

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Unfortunately the sleeve doesn't make the temptation go away. Granted, I'm less hungry than I ever was before - but it still kills me to not eat one of the delicious looking homemade baked goods brought by friends, or to be at a restaurant with friends and sip on the only thing on the menu that meets the liquid or soft food criteria since I'm not on regular solids yet. Meanwhile they partake in all of my old favorites.

Fortunately for me, I'm scared to death of causing a leak so the threat of negative consequences is enough for me to not cheat.

You really need to work out your food addiction issues. The sleeve is a great tool but it cannot make a food addict no longer addicted to food. That is a mental issue and it needs to be addressed separately from the physical issue of the stomach.

Definitely talk with your surgeon and see about getting with a therapist to talk out your issues and concerns. Best of luck.

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I was sleeved on 12/18 and am on liquids until next Wednesday. This is very hard for sure. I have had thinned mashed potatoes and also cottage cheese which is allowed.

Here is the thing, this is really tough and there are a lot of people that post that everything is just dandy and that is great but everyone is different and there are going to be ups and downs with this. I am really surprised that you were able to eat what you did and I think the best way to look at it is not to take it and run but rather to realize that you were given grace and now need to get right back on track. You definitely don't want to harm yourself in any way. The food will wait. This is a lifelong lifestyle change and you can do this but you have to come up with strategies for the tempting times because they will always be there. I'm really preaching to myself and I will confess that my son is home from college and there has been food and treats EVERYWHERE! He made oatmeal choc chip Cookies and I took a couple very small slivers of the "corner" and did okay but was afraid to go any further! Get back on track, we can do this.

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Here is the reality check coming. You have just undergone a major anatomical change to your body surgery to facilitate weight loss because you are miserable being fat. You, like everyone else here, tried everything else and decided to have this surgery as a last resort. You are putting yourself at major risk eating these things, especially the popcorn. It has tiny hard particles that could get caught in the wound that is trying to heal. Only time will tell whether you get an infection from doing that. I hope you don't.

I had my surgery Dec. 7 and knew that Christmas was going to not be the same. It was hard and I ate some mashed avocado and had one bite too much before finally walking away and feeling pretty yucky for 20 minutes. The surgery is a behavioral reinforcement tool that doesn't fix everything. It seems to me that your head hunger is getting the best of you and some counseling to deal with this would be helpful. I spent over 6 months in weekly cognitive behavioral therapy to work on head hunger and food addiction before embarking on this surgical journey. I just stared at my teenager's piece of pizza and my mouth was watering wanting to take a bite. I used some of the self-talking tools I learned in therapy to overcome this temptation. You can do it too but getting help to learn is essential.

My final words are this - do not beat yourself up over it. Reality is that what is done is done and you can only change what you do going forward. You CAN change the way you choose to respond in the future. If that means you avoid certain situations, then do it. Wishing you all the best.

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The bottom line is, as Geaux points out, is you are putting yourself at great risk for complications. I'm guessing your medical team instructed you on this point and that may be one of the reasons you feel guilty. You had this knowledge, yet, you still took the risk. There could be dozens of reasons for this and you may want to talk to a professional to address this.

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Every couple of days there is a thread with these slip ups. Last one was a chocolate chip cookie and the one before that was a dry piece of toast.

Some are going to hit you hard because they fear you will cause a leak. They have lived through it and will feel the need to make you understand what your risking. Every doctor is different and there is no gold standard to when you can eat what in reality but many here do not feel a nipple of junk food is not worth suffering through the torments of a leak! Others here are eatting steak by week three.

Here is my thoughts on your post. You are still trapped in a familiar pattern of failing to resist the temptation, that is cause for concern. It is hard to be full on liquids so I will say I think the temptation is bigger now than it will be when you can fill up on Protein before the chic fila and the movie. However the fact remains in order to set a new pattern that will lead to a healthier you, your going to have to be able to say no.

The answer does not lie in removing all temptation because our love ones still want to eat and go places. The answer comes from with in you. Why did you have surgery? What were your goals? Now why your thinking of those (and I would go as far as to write them out) do a reality check on how you are the one sabatoching your own goals.

After completing this exercise you are back at square one, time to start over. Read through the list of goals and determine not to be the one to sabatoch your own goals. You can be successful by simply not giving up. When things have went wrong pick yourself up, refocus on the goal, and get moving forward. That is a pattern that will lead to success. I know you can do this!

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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