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Friend Telling Me She Has A Vision I Will Die--Nice!



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Hi there. I'm still pre-op. I have a good friend who believes she has visions of future disaters. We were both at a funeral the other day, and right before the funeral started, she grabbed my hand and said, "I don't want you to have the surgery. Are you sure there is nothing we can do?" I told her no and that it was my decision. She then said that she had heard of people recently dying from WLS. I ignored her. Then, a few minutes later she leans over and tells me that she had a premonition that the dead guy at the funeral was going to die. I ignored her and left the funeral quickly after it ended.

This is not the first time she has alluded to a doom and gloom feeling about my surgery although she waits a few months in between saying anything. She has never said it directy, just indirectly like at the funeral. I am so pissed off! Now she has me worrying that I will die from surgery and leave my two young children with only one parent. I feel she is being completely manipulative and even using terrorist tactics with me. I have distanced myself from her.

Just had to vent....thanks for listening.

Shan

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lol wow.

well she loves you and is really frightened. That said, you need to take care of you so you CAN live a long life with you 2 kids. You aren't going to a back alley to receive a hatchet job for goodness sakes :rolleyes:

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Good grief! I think your friend needs to sensor herself a little. I can't imagine saying that to a friend!!!! So much for being supportive! I am still in shock that she would say that to you! Does she ever have a positive premonition?

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Newsflash for your friend....

everybody's going to die from something.

Too much Water

Not enough Water

Too fat

Not fat enough

Too many Vitamins

Not enough Vitamins

Hit by a car while walking

Hit by a car while driving

Hypothermia

Hyperthermia

Lived too long

Born too early

She needs to work on her premonitions, lol! You can't be psychic without details.

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She does care about you. My friend also mentioned to me about this old coworker of hers that died after a bypass wls. I told her that any surgery has complications and I know she also cares about me. I have only told like 6-8 people I think the vsg has me nervous enough that I would not like to be defending reasons for wanting the vsg.

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WOW, why friends like to do this?

I have a good friend and when I was pre op and told her that I want to do the surgery she told me right away that one lady at her work died after the surgery. and I just asked after which one and she has no idea. so Why are they tried to scared people for nothing. I end up not ot tell her about my surgery. it is easy then listen another story that someone died.

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She probably means well - but like many folks, she may not be aware of the statistics with mortality with current WLS practices. My surgeon has been practicing a very long time and has zero fatalities - I am positive most of the surgeons here have the same track record.

Before my husband and I had our surgeries - I too thought the mortality rate was high, until I went to the information seminar and got up to date with accurate figures. I would be irritated as well if someone told me this before surgery. Just know that your current BMI from your ticker puts you in a super safe zone (barring medical issues and comorbidities that you may have) and you should have no problem reaching your goals rapidly if you follow Dr's and NUT orders.

This surgery has been the best thing my husband and I have ever done for ourselves - other than marrying one another :)

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Someone died and hundreds lived long thin lives.... you'll be fine. She won't. (I just got a premonition she'll continue to upset people with her psychic abilities).

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all i can say is "WOW"

totally extreme and unnecessary.

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Don't believe a word of what she said. She might be scared. But she also might be jealous....

However bare in mind that surgeries in general have risks, and no one has immunity, even if their girlfriend tells them that they are going to be fine.

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I didn't tell many people before I had the surgery for that very reason-there is always going to be naysayers & they mean well but don't realize the effect it can have on you. Of course there is risk with ANY surgery so I just chose to wait until after to say anything.

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Tell me, in her premonition were you skinny or fat? I like to keep in mind how much higher the odds are of dying if one stays obese.

Perhaps in her premonition you did not have the surgery and died of a heart attack.

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How strange! Maybe she just tends to have a lot of anxiety and "cares by worrying". It doesn't help when you are already nervous enough already. I have had a lot of mixed reactions: mostly people saying, "Why don't you just try watching your weight first?" Hmmmmm....never thought of that!!! Invasive surgery just looked like fun.....But seriously I am very nervous. I am just more worried about having a heart attack way before my time.

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Like Bean said - my surgeon said that the risk of dying was astronomically higher if we we were obese and sitting in our seats in the conference room as opposed to lying on his operating table. And like Dr. Oz has said - We operate on cancer - if you have something as malignant and health destroying as obesity, you should operate!

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Can she forecast stock market downturns, natural disasters and civil unrest?

I believe she believes this - but I am pretty skeptical. I think she just has some fears and this is how she expresses them.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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