I started on this journey last April when a surgeon refused to replace my knees until I lose 80 pounds. Nearly unable to walk and in constant pain, I still have struggled with the decision to do this. The moment I knew food was going to be "taken from me," I began to eat every morsel like it was my last meal, and gained about another 20 pounds, taking me to my highest and most unhealthy weight ever. The beginning of October came, and the holidays with all the eating events were ahead. I decided to go on a low-carb diet to allow myself some leeway to gain over the holidays without contributing to my all-time highest. To my great surprise, low carb worked for me. I've been struggling with the decision again: if low-carb works, why do this surgery??? But after much prayer, angst, and many tears, I believe I'm finally at peace with this decision. Why am I proud? Because all on my own, I have lost 46 pounds before surgery. Whatever happens in terms of complications, I can honestly say I've done all I could to get myself in the healthiest place possible beforehand. As a food addict, this is huge for me. I'll never know for sure that I couldn't have done it without the surgery, but I do know for sure that I still have a long way to go and I'm now beginning to be excited about the journey, rather than terrified. Just wanted to share!

Your words and attitude are uplifting. I dont know how to describe my emotions. For the most part I am at peace with my decision, however; every now and then I allow fear to creep in. If I had my way there would be a crystal ball with answers to every "what if" question that I have. I'm making pre surgery changes and gearing up for post surgery life. I'd like this part to be over with....... I've asked myself the same question. If you can do it without surgery, why get surgery. This tool will be so much more powerful than what we've tried and failed at. Thanks for sharing.

Writergirl

OMG who wrote the above post, it sounds like me, Last year i was supposed to get my right knee replaced. It was pretty much all set - but when i mentioned to the ortho that i was gonna be having WLS - he said hold the phone (my words!) he said i should lose some weight first before the WLS, my recovery would be better etc.

Well, i was initially very disappointed cuz i really wanted the surgery now. " God grant me patience, just hurry up about it"

Anyways i also new i would not be eating my foods that i love (at least in the large quantities)after surgery, so i ate and ate - my last funeral, and of course i also gained weight. Only difference is that you lost weight before your pending surgery. I didn't, taught a good lesson. I also did know that losing the weight would be beneficial all around.

Now, common to both of us - you will be so excited and scared before the surgery, then more excited, then a combination of the two - but maybe more scared at the end. Thats ok - i think we all feel like that. way.

This has been such an exciting ride for me. I had my surgery 12/15/11 - so i'm still a newbie i guess - loving every new day - really enjoying it. Things will be hard sometimes - but for me it was so totally worth it. :regular_smile:

My journey continues...........and yours is about to start :welldoneclap:

good luck

kathy

Hello, I started my initial journey in 2010. My mother and I were in a terrible, and my journey came to a screeching halt. (At this point, I am still suffering from the accident.) My injuries required steroid therapy; so, doctor put me on steroids and I gained even more weight.

Now, I have to explain that my PCP did not agree with any type of weight loss surgery at first. I had to threaten to find another doctor, if he wouldn't at least research it. He finally agreed and my journey began. My doctor was out of the country when my accident occured. So, when he returned, he could not believe the weight gain or the increase of my blood sugar levels. At this point, he had to put me on medicine for diabetes and made me promise to start the process for my surgery again.

The accident made me look at things from a different prospective, and I made the decision to lose the weight on my own. Well, that was a disaster and the weight continued to pile on & my diabetes medicine wasn't working.

After a major internal struggle, I decided to have lapband surgery. When I went to meet with my surgeon, he threw a monkey wrench into my plans and suggested the sleeve. I struggled with the sleeve because there isn't any long term data to support this type of weight loss surgery.

So, I decided to start watching YouTube videos and join blogs to learn more informtion. When attend my third nutrition class in February, I can now tell them that I will be having the Gastric Sleeve surgery...

Being scared just before surgery is normal, and so is the "I can do this on my own" thought process. But, let's be honest here, we've all tried and tried and tried to lose the weight "on our own". We've all failed, or we wouldn't be in a place where we are seriously considering WLS of any kind! The thought process is normal, but we have to look at things honestly in order to move forward.

I know that surgery was MY last resort. My doctors said lose weight or die. I'm losing, but even with that threat, I couldn't do it on my own, and I knew it. I've lost 81 pounds in the 4.5 months since surgery. NO WAY in H E double hockey sticks could I have done that alone! I have a chance at a longer, better life now!!

So, while I went through the same thought processes you all did, I also went through with the surgery, even KNOWING I was gonna die on that table. I was ecstatic when I woke up from surgery...and I'm still thankful today for my second chance at life. I think that most of us, once we're through the healing and liquid diet phases, are happy that we took the chance and had the surgery.

Good luck to you all!!!

I meant "a terrible car accident"...sorry!

Thank you...I'm actually getting excited!!! I can't wait until June!

Thank you to all for sharing your stories. I did forget to mention that my surgery is on Tuesday. I've spent the past several months in terror, and you made me laugh, Lissa, when you said you KNEW you were going to die in surgery, because that's just how I've been feeling. I've called all my friends to say goodbye and have left detailed instructions just in case. I realized today that throughout this entire process there has been a small voice in my heart saying that I was really NOT going to go through with this. That voice is quiet now. No, I'm not 100 percent certain. But I'm as close as I'm going to get and it's time to just put the decision to rest and get on with my life!

Sunday evening, the 22nd

Dear Writergirl,

Congratulations on your decision to get healthier! I have spent most of my life going to Weight Watchers, Overeaters Annonymous, Overeaters Victorious, Diet Center, Jenny Craig, Weight Down Workshop, etc., etc., etc.!!! Essentially doing ANYTHING I could to lose excess weight.

I did EVERYTHING I could think of, read about, etc to lose weight. And I did loose weight. I ALWAYS lost a significant amount of weight. The only problem was, when I would get bored with my diet, or when I got most of the weight off, I would think "Yeah! Now I can eat again!" and soon I would gain everything back, plus a few more pounds. I have always been "fluffy", but the last few years (I am 62), I gained enough to qualify as "morbidly obese". I finally made the decision in early 2011 that I had to "do something" to stop the madness!

After spending a lot of time on this web site reading other individuals experiences, I made the decision to have a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. I had my surgery on June 18, and have lost a total of 98 pounds so far. I have 10 pounds left to go to get to goal. My weight loss has slowed down considerably, but I am confident that I will eventually get there eventually. And truthfully, if I NEVER loose another ounce, I am happy where I am!

I am so thrilled with how I feel, and needless to say, I am thrilled to death with how I look! I wore a size 26/28 top and size 24 pants prior to my surgery. I now wear a size 8 in slacks/pants/jeans and a 12 or 14 in tops. I have been able to go off my blood pressure medication, my arthritis meds, my cholesterol meds and my allergy meds (can't tell you why on that last one!). I have loads of energy and feel so much better than I did 8 months ago.

It wasn't all easy. I was plagued by a bone deep fatigue for weeks after the surgery. I went back to work 10 days after the surgery, and let me tell you, I had to literally DRAG myself to work every night! I am a nurse and work 12 hour shifts, and I wasn't sure I was going to make it initially when I went back to work. I also fought with nausea for several weeks after the surgery. I still have to eat slowly to "catch" the "cue" that I am full. I try to count my bites as I eat, and chew slowly and really well. I know that my pouch will hold 7-8 bites. If I go one bite past full I am very uncomfortable for several hours, so I try to catch that "cue" when it happens so I don't over eat. I also lost a lot of my hair when I was about 4-5 months post op. But it is coming back now, the fatigue is long gone, and the nausea is only a distant memory.

I personally have four friends who have had various bariatric type surgeries in the past, and have overeaten and gained all or most of their weight back. I am working REALLY hard to make sure that I don't join their little group. I have joined a Wellness Center and work out four days a week. I am doing everything I know of to get and stay healthy.

So again, let me congratulate you on your decision! Be sure and keep us all posted as to how you are doing after your surgery. We all love to Celebrate your victories with you. Will be sending prayers your way as you undergo your procedure! Best of luck and keep us all posted!

Kathy D (alias Helen the Cat)