I’m new to this but need some HELPFUL feedback. When I told my husband about me visiting a doctor for my weight he wasn’t happy. When I found out it was the sleeve he told me I’m a failure at life because I can’t control myself. This HURT!! I just told him he could feel anyway he wanted. I feel like this is ME TAKING CONTROL of my LIFE! Then he told me I couldn’t tell ANYONE I was having this because I should be ashamed. He didn’t even want me telling my MOTHER. I went the next day and talked to my Mom and told her what I was going to do. At first she was scared for me because my oldest sister had the Gastric Bypass and has had lots of problems. She doesn’t regret doing it. After visiting with my Mom for a while she was VERY SUPPORTIVE of my decision. Even told me she has been praying for me to lose weight and get healthy.

Next, I talked to my daughters. My oldest said that is good but it isn’t fair that I will lose my weight fast. See she has lost over 100 pounds in the last two years but she did it on her own. I just told her I’m not as young as you are. She supports me now!

Then was my youngest daughters turn, who wants to be a doctor. At first she said why do you want to do this to yourself? I told her then she said, and I quote, “What are you going to do when you GAIN back all your weight?” I looked at her and said why would you tell me this? Again, my feelings were HURT.

The next day I sat my Husband and my youngest daughter down and told them this is a HUGE decision I’ve made in my life and I NEED support not NEGATIVE feedback. If you can’t be supportive then don’t say anything at all. They both agreed they would TRY to understand. They are both thin & fit and can’t even begin to know what I’m going through.

I found this website and have read and read and read your comments and you have HELPED me so much. I NEED support right now and since I CAN’T tell anyone else I hoping to make friends on here that UNDERSTAND what I’m going through.

HOPING my surgery will be in December! I have to diet for three months for insurance purposes!!

I have been visiting this site for about a month now. Just reading and learning about the sleeve. I didn't register until I read your post. I had an appointment with a surgeon for a consultation a few weeks back. I wasn't going to tell my husband because I had a feeling he might be against the surgery. However, the night before the appointment I got the case of the guilt’s because I was keeping something from him. So I told him about the appointment and what I was thinking of having done. He was so against it and was so closed minded!!! I asked him to go to the appointment with me so he could learn about the surgery and ask questions too. BUT I told him to only come with me if he was willing to have an open mind. The next morning he was sitting on the couch and I could tell he was upset. I asked him how he was and he said terrible he didn't sleep all night and was completely against the surgery. I told him to stay home if he couldn't open his mind just a crack! Honestly, we have been married for 15 years and he has always supported me and been by my side for everything. I went to my appointment and loved my surgeon and can't wait to have my surgery.

My husband asked how the appointment went and I said well. He asked if I got the answers I was looking for and I said yes. He didn't ask if I was going to have the surgery or not and I didn't say that I was. I asked the surgeon if he had any patients that had unsupportive spouses and he said yes. Not often but yes there are a few here and there. So, I'm going to have my surgery. I'm not sure of the date yet but I'm a self pay (my insurance will not even consider paying) so it will be in the next month. I haven't told my husband or anyone else. I have relied on these forums for information and now I'll be utilizing it for support as well.

I know this is a long post but your post inspired me to register and become a part of this community. Thank you.

A new life a new day! I'm SO HAPPY I can help you! This is something I've been struggling with for two years now. KEEP in contact with me and we can help each other. This website gave me so much SUPPORT already!! Just me having someone to talk to is such a HUGE RELIEF!