I'm coming up on surgery pretty soon and looking forward to some post-op dating experiences once I've healed and recovered. But, I keep having these wierd thoughts about how a man might react once he finds out that I used to be obese and had to cut my stomach out to loose weight.:thumbup1: Like, is he going to go running away screaming at the top of his lungs? Is he going to be thinking that I'm going to blow my surgery and get fat again? Will he think it's just better to dump me before I get big again or before I cut some other part of my body off?

I know this is crazy, nonproductive type thinking, but I can't help it. I'm doing my best to be prepared for how things will be post-op and this is one issue I can't rationalize or wrap my mind around.

So, I'm coming to you guys for advice. I know that the men here will naturally be biased because you're pre- or post-op yourself so you're okay with the need for the surgery. But, can you step out of the situation and think about how you might act if you met a woman who had lost weight because of surgery? Ladies, what has been your experience with dating and telling a man that you had WLS? Did they run off, pretend to be ok with it, or really accept it and continue with the relationship?

For clarification, I'm not talking about telling a man I don't know well about this. I'm talking about the point where I have been dating someone for several months or more and am beginning to build a serious relationship with - someone I don't want to hide things from...

HELP before I drive myself crazy thinking about this! :svengo:

Well said! That was actually what I was trying to say in an earlier post! Self-confidence is an aphrodisiac. That's why "bad boys" are so attractive to women. And a self-confident woman (not a self-centered woman) is usually a better bed partner.

As ouroborous intimated, a person apologizing all the time for her arms, tummy or whatever, is really focused on all the wrong stuff when you're wanting to have a good time. It's been my experience that if you're focused on your mate and you're not worried about your pound of flesh (metaphorically) you're both going to have more fun for sure!