Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Let's get this singles forum going!



Recommended Posts

I am going to be sleeved Wednesday but I'm already thinking a year down the road. An old flame who lives out of state just got divorced, and I'm thinking, in a year I won't be embarrassed to see him lol! Until then I'm just going to concentrate on losing weight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I will admit dating is terrifying! Especially when you are so overweight. I am anxious to see if I feel any different after I take the weight off. I getting sleeved on Thursday, I'm thinking maybe by the new year I will be ready for another try at dating.

Oh, and for what it's worth, I had alot of fun on a site called plentyoffish.com (plenty of fish). It's free, and I met a few nice guys on there.....and a few toads.

K

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh yeah, plenty of fish is lots of fun. I am now writing to 3 different guys.

It really sucks that I went through so many years being fat. It's been lots of fun dating, but I wish I had done this years ago.

Another good site I like is singlesnet. I like that one because only one person has to pay. So if you find a guy who has paid, you can write to him.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am 35 almost *gulp* 36. I had my surgery 3 months ago and am loving it. The only thing i hated was not being able to chug drinks in the hot hot hot weather here in the south. Thankful its winter now down here! I've tried online dating and had my duds too. waiting for that special someone to come along.., trying not to LOOK for him but peeking occasionally. Do we tell them about our surgery to explain why we eat like birds and are losing weight so fast?

Rebecca

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am 35 almost *gulp* 36. I had my surgery 3 months ago and am loving it. The only thing i hated was not being able to chug drinks in the hot hot hot weather here in the south. Thankful its winter now down here! I've tried online dating and had my duds too. waiting for that special someone to come along.., trying not to LOOK for him but peeking occasionally. Do we tell them about our surgery to explain why we eat like birds and are losing weight so fast?

Rebecca

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I still think that in our culture, the overwhelming majority of men are not attracted to obese women.

I see the exact opposite. Look at all the husband/boyfriend photos on here and other obese boards, you see all overweight women with 99% skinny guys. The lack of fat guys is amazing, in fact I see them alone when I finally spot 'em for the most part.

I just came from a Halloween party, consisting of mostly obese women. When I went to flirt with some, they would RUN FROM ME. Like go into the other room, dive into the kitchen where the other people were, anything to get away before I arrived. They averted their eyes, just kinda politely smiled then bailed as I was talking to them. I even had one lady go into the other room ALONE. She'd rather stand alone than talk to me. Seriously?

And then the skinny guys would come behind me and get a great response from the same women that ignored me. But then they would come and say goodbye to me as they were leaving, maybe to rub it into my face.

Reminds of my dating site adventure (Plenty of Fish) where I went on FIFTY FIRST DATES. It's like that movie, except the movie was funny, and a fat guy doing 50 first dates that epic fail is not even remotely funny. I had one woman who saw me from a distance. She was my date. And she got back in her car and drove off. And another wonderful date where this girl gets up from her chair and moves another chair down, so she's out of physical contact range from me.

And of course I start sweating because I'm in a heavy Halloween outfit and fat. So they turn the air conditioner on (without me asking) when it's like 30 degrees outside, and blame me once people start complaining. That really helped too. So I go outside and there's two women smoking, who immediately put out their cigarettes and go inside as I step out the door.

Another party tomorrow night, but I'm gonna pass. Think I'll grab a case of beer and down it in one sitting with some tequila shots alone in my house. Can't wait for the surgery, maybe then women will talk to me after I'm skinny...

You girls think you have it rough, try being a fat GUY.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You girls think you have it rough, try being a fat GUY.

I realize this thread is old, but I wanted to chime in.

My experience is that there is a certain personality that comes with being a fat guy.. It's some kind of combination of self judgement, fear of being hurt, low self esteem, and a general all around negative attitude.

I think women naturally avoid fat guys because of those secondary side effects. No one wants to be around some judgmental negative downer.

Women are looking for strong confident leader type of guys with a positive outlook.... and I think it's hard for fat guys to act that way when they spend most of their time judging their looks, and focusing on feeling like an outcast.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've had a lot of fun dating.

I just met a new guy about 6 weeks ago and things are going well. We met on Plenty of fish. He wrote to me first.

I finally told him about my WLS and he said he was glad I had it because he would not have written if I weighed 100 lbs more.

It feels so good to be a normal weight. Guys always open doors for me

when I am out and about.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I finally told him about my WLS and he said he was glad I had it because he would not have written if I weighed 100 lbs more.

Boy do I have mixed feelings about that...

The "Growing up on disney movies" side of me wants to believe that people would love me no matter what I look like because I'm a great person.

The "Reality" side of me knows that's BS, and wonders how many amazing people I've missed out on getting to know in my life because of my weight. (And conversely, how many people have missed out on getting to know me.)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I SOOOO feel all of you. I'm 33 and am single. I just have this feeling that guys are going to actually look at me twice and talk to me when I'm average weight. I HOPEEEEE to meet my soulmate, and I feel this is a tool to do it. Call me crazy, but it's true. The quality of guys go down as your weight goes up. At least in my experience. I used to be average weight and I always got the looks. Granted, I'm older now, but 33 isn't too old. I'm just SOOOOOOO excited to do this and get it overwith and be NORMAL and feel cute again!!!! And maybe even meet someone!!!

Oregondaisy- it's true--- people judge a book by its cover. I'm SURE whoever I end up dating would also say they wouldnt have looked twice if I were 100 pounds heavier. Plus, I want that self confidence and mojo back. Sparkle. I call it sparkle. I want it back , dang it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi All,

I have enjoyed this thread. I am due to get "sleeved" on the 22nd of Sept, and was wondering what it is like to be single after being sleeved. I too am 35 (almost) 36. I am making the change to be a healthier, fitter, more active me. But I would be lying if I didnt say that I also hoped that it would help me be more open to meeting a "nice" guy. I have had passing things with quite a few nice guys but havent ever let them in, which I think in the end is why we are not together.

All I can say is bring on the next chapter.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm with a wonderful man now. He is the one I posted about when we were only together 6 weeks and it's been 4 months now. I am extremely happy.

I've had a lot of fun dating. You're lucky that you're doing this so young.

Believe me, it's going to change your life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm with a wonderful man now. He is the one I posted about when we were only together 6 weeks and it's been 4 months now. I am extremely happy.

I've had a lot of fun dating. You're lucky that you're doing this so young.

Believe me, it's going to change your life.

I'm so glad you've found a great guy. I hope that one day I can post the same thing. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm with a wonderful man now. He is the one I posted about when we were only together 6 weeks and it's been 4 months now. I am extremely happy.

I've had a lot of fun dating. You're lucky that you're doing this so young.

Believe me, it's going to change your life.

Thanks :)

Congratulations on your new man!

I too hope to have as much fun. Not sure I am that young, wish I had done it a few years ago now (but I chickened out then, this time I am very sure)

But I guess you are never too old to fall in love.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Onedayatatime365

      Looking to connect with others who are also on the journey of better health. Post-Op Gastric Sleeve (4/11/24).
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • jparadigm

      Happy Wednesday!
       
      I hope everyone is having a lovely week so far! 
      It's been a bit of a struggle this last week...I'm hungry ALL the time.
      · 1 reply
      1. BlondePatriotInCDA

        Have a great Wednesday too! Sorry you're hungry all the time, I'm pretty much the same..and I'm sick of eating the same food all the time.

    • ChunkCat

      Well, tomorrow I go in for an impromptu hiatal hernia repair after ending up in the ER over the weekend because I couldn't get food down and water was moving at a trickle... I've been having these symptoms on and off for a few weeks but Sunday was the worst by far and came with chest pain and trouble breathing. The ER PA thinks it is just esophagitis and that the surgeon and radiologist are wrong. But the bariatric surgeon swears it is a hernia, possibly a sliding one based on my symptoms. So he fit me into his schedule this week to repair it! I hope he's right and this sorts it out. He's going to do a scope afterwards to be sure there is nothing wrong with the esophagus. Here's hoping it all goes well!!
      · 4 replies
      1. AmberFL

        omgsh!! Hope all goes well!! Keeping you in my thoughts!

      2. gracesmommy2

        Hope you’re doing well!

      3. NickelChip

        I hope it goes well! Sending positive thoughts for a speedy recovery!

      4. AmberFL

        How are you doing? any update?!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×