Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Let's get this singles forum going!



Recommended Posts

I am going to be sleeved Wednesday but I'm already thinking a year down the road. An old flame who lives out of state just got divorced, and I'm thinking, in a year I won't be embarrassed to see him lol! Until then I'm just going to concentrate on losing weight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I will admit dating is terrifying! Especially when you are so overweight. I am anxious to see if I feel any different after I take the weight off. I getting sleeved on Thursday, I'm thinking maybe by the new year I will be ready for another try at dating.

Oh, and for what it's worth, I had alot of fun on a site called plentyoffish.com (plenty of fish). It's free, and I met a few nice guys on there.....and a few toads.

K

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh yeah, plenty of fish is lots of fun. I am now writing to 3 different guys.

It really sucks that I went through so many years being fat. It's been lots of fun dating, but I wish I had done this years ago.

Another good site I like is singlesnet. I like that one because only one person has to pay. So if you find a guy who has paid, you can write to him.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am 35 almost *gulp* 36. I had my surgery 3 months ago and am loving it. The only thing i hated was not being able to chug drinks in the hot hot hot weather here in the south. Thankful its winter now down here! I've tried online dating and had my duds too. waiting for that special someone to come along.., trying not to LOOK for him but peeking occasionally. Do we tell them about our surgery to explain why we eat like birds and are losing weight so fast?

Rebecca

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am 35 almost *gulp* 36. I had my surgery 3 months ago and am loving it. The only thing i hated was not being able to chug drinks in the hot hot hot weather here in the south. Thankful its winter now down here! I've tried online dating and had my duds too. waiting for that special someone to come along.., trying not to LOOK for him but peeking occasionally. Do we tell them about our surgery to explain why we eat like birds and are losing weight so fast?

Rebecca

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I still think that in our culture, the overwhelming majority of men are not attracted to obese women.

I see the exact opposite. Look at all the husband/boyfriend photos on here and other obese boards, you see all overweight women with 99% skinny guys. The lack of fat guys is amazing, in fact I see them alone when I finally spot 'em for the most part.

I just came from a Halloween party, consisting of mostly obese women. When I went to flirt with some, they would RUN FROM ME. Like go into the other room, dive into the kitchen where the other people were, anything to get away before I arrived. They averted their eyes, just kinda politely smiled then bailed as I was talking to them. I even had one lady go into the other room ALONE. She'd rather stand alone than talk to me. Seriously?

And then the skinny guys would come behind me and get a great response from the same women that ignored me. But then they would come and say goodbye to me as they were leaving, maybe to rub it into my face.

Reminds of my dating site adventure (Plenty of Fish) where I went on FIFTY FIRST DATES. It's like that movie, except the movie was funny, and a fat guy doing 50 first dates that epic fail is not even remotely funny. I had one woman who saw me from a distance. She was my date. And she got back in her car and drove off. And another wonderful date where this girl gets up from her chair and moves another chair down, so she's out of physical contact range from me.

And of course I start sweating because I'm in a heavy Halloween outfit and fat. So they turn the air conditioner on (without me asking) when it's like 30 degrees outside, and blame me once people start complaining. That really helped too. So I go outside and there's two women smoking, who immediately put out their cigarettes and go inside as I step out the door.

Another party tomorrow night, but I'm gonna pass. Think I'll grab a case of beer and down it in one sitting with some tequila shots alone in my house. Can't wait for the surgery, maybe then women will talk to me after I'm skinny...

You girls think you have it rough, try being a fat GUY.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You girls think you have it rough, try being a fat GUY.

I realize this thread is old, but I wanted to chime in.

My experience is that there is a certain personality that comes with being a fat guy.. It's some kind of combination of self judgement, fear of being hurt, low self esteem, and a general all around negative attitude.

I think women naturally avoid fat guys because of those secondary side effects. No one wants to be around some judgmental negative downer.

Women are looking for strong confident leader type of guys with a positive outlook.... and I think it's hard for fat guys to act that way when they spend most of their time judging their looks, and focusing on feeling like an outcast.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've had a lot of fun dating.

I just met a new guy about 6 weeks ago and things are going well. We met on Plenty of fish. He wrote to me first.

I finally told him about my WLS and he said he was glad I had it because he would not have written if I weighed 100 lbs more.

It feels so good to be a normal weight. Guys always open doors for me

when I am out and about.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I finally told him about my WLS and he said he was glad I had it because he would not have written if I weighed 100 lbs more.

Boy do I have mixed feelings about that...

The "Growing up on disney movies" side of me wants to believe that people would love me no matter what I look like because I'm a great person.

The "Reality" side of me knows that's BS, and wonders how many amazing people I've missed out on getting to know in my life because of my weight. (And conversely, how many people have missed out on getting to know me.)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I SOOOO feel all of you. I'm 33 and am single. I just have this feeling that guys are going to actually look at me twice and talk to me when I'm average weight. I HOPEEEEE to meet my soulmate, and I feel this is a tool to do it. Call me crazy, but it's true. The quality of guys go down as your weight goes up. At least in my experience. I used to be average weight and I always got the looks. Granted, I'm older now, but 33 isn't too old. I'm just SOOOOOOO excited to do this and get it overwith and be NORMAL and feel cute again!!!! And maybe even meet someone!!!

Oregondaisy- it's true--- people judge a book by its cover. I'm SURE whoever I end up dating would also say they wouldnt have looked twice if I were 100 pounds heavier. Plus, I want that self confidence and mojo back. Sparkle. I call it sparkle. I want it back , dang it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi All,

I have enjoyed this thread. I am due to get "sleeved" on the 22nd of Sept, and was wondering what it is like to be single after being sleeved. I too am 35 (almost) 36. I am making the change to be a healthier, fitter, more active me. But I would be lying if I didnt say that I also hoped that it would help me be more open to meeting a "nice" guy. I have had passing things with quite a few nice guys but havent ever let them in, which I think in the end is why we are not together.

All I can say is bring on the next chapter.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm with a wonderful man now. He is the one I posted about when we were only together 6 weeks and it's been 4 months now. I am extremely happy.

I've had a lot of fun dating. You're lucky that you're doing this so young.

Believe me, it's going to change your life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm with a wonderful man now. He is the one I posted about when we were only together 6 weeks and it's been 4 months now. I am extremely happy.

I've had a lot of fun dating. You're lucky that you're doing this so young.

Believe me, it's going to change your life.

I'm so glad you've found a great guy. I hope that one day I can post the same thing. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm with a wonderful man now. He is the one I posted about when we were only together 6 weeks and it's been 4 months now. I am extremely happy.

I've had a lot of fun dating. You're lucky that you're doing this so young.

Believe me, it's going to change your life.

Thanks :)

Congratulations on your new man!

I too hope to have as much fun. Not sure I am that young, wish I had done it a few years ago now (but I chickened out then, this time I am very sure)

But I guess you are never too old to fall in love.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×