Hi, all -

I've been off the board for a few weeks, my mom died on April 10th, she was only 63. She went into a renal (kidney) failure as a result of a fatal post-surgical blood infection that she contracted from what was supposed to be a minor (lapro) gallbladder removal surgery on Friday April 7th. She was a diabetic, and the doctors said all her co-morbities - to include her morbid obesity - was the reason her body could not fight off the infection so she died.

Sooo... here I am, my own lap-band surgery scheduled for 2 weeks from now (May 9th), with myself, family and friends second guessing whether or not I should do this now. I now have the small fear of having surgery and not waking up, which I'm sure is ridculous since although I am 100 lbs overweight but otherwise healthy as a horse, and need to feel better I am doing the right thing in this tremendously stressful and sorrowful time.

On the other hand, my mom was as sick as she was due mostly to her life-long obesity. This being said, I am 33 years old and have the chance with this surgery to nip obesity in the bud now and be a heathier person down the road, never even getting diabetes in the first place.

Ah, what to do, what to do? Help - need your loving advice!

Oh my goodness, such wonderful advice and empathy - thank you so much to everyone... your posts made me cry. I promise to give good thought to all of what you've said and will keep this band-family updated on what I wind up doing.

My "gut" (no pun intended) is leaning (again, no pun intended...) towards going ahead with the surgery on the 9th. Based on the comments in this forum, I have the utmost trust in my surgeon (Dr. Rumbaut in Monterrey, Mexico) and know I'm physically a great candidate for this. I worry if I don't do it now, I'll won't get up the nerve to do it again - I'm a big procrastinator. We'll see though - the pain of my mom's loss is still so fresh.

Thanks again to all of you. - Dawn

I, too, am so sorry to hear about your mom. I haven't had to face that yet and can't imagine how hard it must be.

Only you know whether you can handle this extra stress right now. If you need to wait, just take all the time you need. Someone suggested that it might be a way to honor your mom to go ahead, and I liked that suggestion, but we can't decide what's right for you.

It's normal to fear the surgery...all of us were a little (or a lot!) nervous, but it is a fairly routine surgery and is probably safer than continuing without it. Know that you have lots of support and love here, whatever you decide.

Hugs~

Emily

I am so Sorry Dawn - My sincere condolances...

Dawn...so sorry about your Mom. I can only imagine. I'd go ahead with the surgery. There will be doubts and jitters before hand. However, I believe your Mother, as in most Mothers, want their children to be happy and HEALTHY! Good luck with your decision. Shawn

Dawn, I'm very sorry to hear about your mom. Your doubts are understandable, but I think that in your position I would have the surgery as scheduled.

Dr. Rumbaut is a wonderful doctor, and if you tell him of your concerns, I'm sure he will do everything he can to help you understand the risks, and what he does to avoid problems.

*hugs*

Dawn, I'm so sorry for your loss. (((((HUGS)))))

Whatever decision you make will be the right decision!

I'll keep you & your family in my thoughts.